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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to take this cat to our vets

18 replies

StarlingMurmuration · 25/08/2015 17:19

Background: we have recently moved house, we've got two lovely kitties who are nearly two years old, and a lovely DS who is nine months old - he gets on reasonably well with our cats, the boy cat in particular. The cats have adapted really well to the house move and the baby.

The house is rented and while we're allowed the cats, we're not allowed to put a cat door in, so we leave a very small window open for them to get in and out. Since we moved in, there's been a thin and quite scabby cat who comes in sometimes - we think it's stealing their food, and on cold or rainy days, we often find it asleep in the conservatory. Our cats seem a bit perturbed by it but aren't actually fighting with it - but then they're not very aggressive in general when defending their territory, so we're not sure whether they're just frightened of it.

We're not bothered about it eating their food, as long as they're still getting enough. We're not bothered about it sleeping in the conservatory, as long as our cats aren't unhappy. If it were in good condition, we'd in, it was a neighbour's cat and probably just chuck it out whenever we see it in the house but we think from its condition that it must be a stray.

So finally here's the AIBU - would we be unreasonable to take it to our vets to get looked over? And to treat it for fleas? I'm not worried about it passing anything on to our cats because they're both up to day with their jabs but I don't want it to bring fleas in. A further AIBU - would we be unreasonable to adopt to, informally? We wouldn't shut it in, but we'd make it welcome. I'd not want to steal anyone's cat but I don't think it's being looked after.

OP posts:
MaidOfStars · 25/08/2015 17:22

The vet can check if it's microchipped.

You could put up some "lost" signs.

And if the answer is negative on both counts, I'd think you were very nice to look after him!

pigsDOfly · 25/08/2015 17:31

Definitely take it to vet, it might possibly be microchip and be someone's lost pet.

Also you really need to know if it's got anything it could pass on to your cats. We had a poor stray coming to our garden when I had my cats, it looked really ill so I rang the RSPCA and got a trap to catch it. Turned out it had feline aids and had to be pts. Fortunately, our cats and the stray were all non aggressive and there was no danger of our cats being bitten, which is how it's passed on but I had my cats tested even so.

If you find out it's reasonably healthy and no owner is found, can't see a reason not to adopt it. It's a lovely thing to do. You could try putting up found posters up locally before you get too fond of it though.

pigsDOfly · 25/08/2015 17:32

X post with MaidOfStars. Must type more quickly.:)

StarlingMurmuration · 25/08/2015 17:39

Now I'm worried! Our cats are up to date with their regular inoculations, would these include feline AIDS?

OP posts:
Miloarmadillo1 · 25/08/2015 17:47

There is no vaccine for FIV ( feline AIDS) but it's only spread by biting or sex, not sharing bowls etc.
The vet could probably supply a paper collar to alert a possible owner that you are worried about the cat.

googoodolly · 25/08/2015 17:51

Take it to the vets and get it scanned for a chip. If it's not chipped, they'll probably advertise it on their site for a while (a week is normal) and then ask you whether you want it before they give it to a shelter.

StarlingMurmuration · 27/08/2015 20:26

Thanks everyone! I'm going to give it a few more days to make sure it really is adopting us, then make an appt at the vet. At the moment there's no guarentee it will be around to take it to the vet, it doesn't turn up every day yet. But this morning and yesterday morning we found it in the lounge on the sofa when we got up at 5am with DS, and when I came home this afternoon, it was there again, then followed me into the kitchen and shouted for me to fill the cats' bowls!

OP posts:
Fluffycloudland77 · 27/08/2015 21:49

I'd put down extra food, he must be starving.

Floralnomad · 27/08/2015 21:56

It does sound like you've got a new pet !

LumelaMme · 27/08/2015 21:59

Definitely a case of taking it to the vet to check for a chip and on the cat's state of health, and put a few posters up.

We did just that for a stray 7 or 8 years ago. He's never moved out: he sleeps on DD's bed and hammers on the box for his pouch of Whiskas.

WorraLiberty · 27/08/2015 22:00

Can you describe what you mean by 'scabby'? Does it have a skin condition? I'm wondering if it could be passed on to your cats.

Basically, your house is an open shed to this cat...with food and comfort thrown in. So even if it does have a nice home (and is being treated for the skin condition), it's still going to make a bee line for your window at night.

It wouldn't hurt to take it to the vet though, to make sure it's micro chipped and being treated.

MrsPCR · 27/08/2015 22:19

We had a 'stray' cat around our way. Very thin and matted fur. Took it to the vets and it was microchipped but owner had moved and not updated their address. Rang RSPCA as well who refused to do anything as cat was owned. We downloaded some paper collars from the RSPCA which allows you to put your number on the cat so if it is going home, its owners will call you.

Owners turned up. They have a new dog.... Poor cat is permanently outside, still matted but they won't rehome it. I feel so sorry for it sat on the doorstep ALL the time. Will see what happens when the weather turns....

thecatneuterer · 28/08/2015 03:36

I would certainly take him to a vet and get him looked at and neutered if he isn't already. They can check for a chip. I definitely wouldn't put up posters though. If he has a home nearby they obviously aren't taking care of him, so there is no point trying to find them.

He could easily be FIV positive if he is an unneutered male. But he won't pass it to your cats unless they start have very vicious fights. And FIV isn't the death sentence that HIV is in humans without treatment. Most FIV positive cat seem to lead happy, healthy lives, so it's not something to worry about or even test for, unless for diagnostic reasons.

Mermaidhair · 28/08/2015 04:35

I'm so happy you are caring for this kitty! I smiled when you said he followed you into the kitchen and asked for food! It sounds like he is happy. Yes take him to the vet, and go from there.

StarlingMurmuration · 28/08/2015 06:51

Neutering is a god idea, I hadn't thought of that. I'm really keen to check if it has a chip - ours are chipped and we updated them as soon as we moved house, but I know people don't always remember. I'm worried that the previous tenants in our house may have left it behind when they moved, because it really did appear on the doorstep as soon as we moved in.

Worra, it has scabs on its head and one of its legs... DP is concerned it might be contagious, and so am I, but his solution is that we should drive the cat off whenever we see it in the house, which I can't bring myself to do. We talked about it last night and I told him I am going to take it to the vets and pay for its treatment if necessary - I just can't bear the thought that it thinks it's found a safe happy home with us and then we send it packing. I know it could have a home on our estate somewhere else and just be taking advantage of us, but I'd rather that be the case than we scare it off and it's got no mummy or daddy to look after it. Especially since winter is coming.

It was in the conservatory again this morning - I fed it when I fed our cats, just put a bowl away from the others. It's very thin, poor thing.

OP posts:
StarlingMurmuration · 28/08/2015 06:59

We've also just mentioned to our landlady about having a cat flap installed, and she said we could, but it would have to be in one of the conservatory doors, which would mean we'd have to get a specialist to fit it in glass. If we then got a cat flap which only let our cats in and out (which DP suggested as tHE only way to stop the new cat getting in), it would end up costing a fortune! So I said I'd rather we spent that money on vets bills for the cat than on a cat flap to keep it out.

I'm going to call it Maximus because it tools quite gladiatorial to me, with its battle scars. Max for short. Just outing myself with this pic now since I've mentioned him on facebook too!

AIBU to take this cat to our vets
OP posts:
Fluffycloudland77 · 28/08/2015 07:04

I couldn't drive it off either. Men eh?.

BathshebaDarkstone · 28/08/2015 07:11

Poor cat. I'd definitely take him to the vet. I agree that if he isn't microchipped and his owner can't be found then you can adopt him. Smile

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