To expect an actual invite

[Lolimax]

Apparently we've been invited to an evening wedding party next week. I say apparently as there's no actual invite it's just an informal 'please come' from a workmate to DH. I don't know either of the couple involved, suffer from a little social anxiety and feel awkward turning up without actually knowing that the bride knows we are coming. So, aibu?

Who invited DH? The bride or groom?

I'd trust DH on this one. He's not going to want to crash a mates wedding. If he says you've been verbally invited, and you have no reason to disbelieve him, plan for it and go :) Otherwise your anxiety will probably stop you both from being involved, as they are unlikely to have unwritten invitations having around now, and it'd be very awkward for your DH to ask for an actual invite (unless you're happy for him to explain about the anxiety?)

Thanks :) oh I trust we've been invited. Maybe I'm looking for reasons not to go. The thought of walking into a room full of strangers who know each other!!! DH wants to go, he has all details in his head. I don't want to let him down though. Grrrrrr my anxiety!

They won't all know each other - most of the other guests won't have met before :)

I have anxiety too. I'm working really hard on it. I will say, it gets easier every time!

Not everyone will know each other. Most people won't. You have DH, too, I bet there will be some people who don't know anyone and go on their own. Weddings are friendly places.

Do you have something to wear? If you start thinking about practicalities, you might find you'll feel a bit less anxious about going? It feels well planned, then.

I lied a bit when I said I didn't know ANYONE. DH's best mate and his wife will be there but they are all day guests (and will probably be 3 sheets to the wind by 7 lol). But I've missed out on too many occasions in the past (DH is 2nd H and is fab at helping me) so I will go. Can't really afford new clothes but have got a maxi dress which I do feel good in. Thanks for your understanding.

The good thing about weddings is that you can usually sneak off without anyone really noticing (if your anxiety does get bad) and also there's lots of common ground to talk about - maybe prepping a few questions in your head might make you feel more relaxed about chatting to people you haven't met before..

How was the ceremony? Isn't the brides dress lovely? How do you know the bride and groom? Isn't the venue lovely? What did you eat? Will you be having a boogie later? Etc etc etc...

All might seem contrived and repetitive but I'm sure lots of others will be feeling a bit nervous not having met many others before too so you won't be the only one.

Hope you enjoy yourselves