AIBU to not want to smell smoke in my house?

[YourFredIsBoring]

I am expecting to be told that IABU or at the very least, have mixed opinions.

I had new neighbours move in last week. We live in a semi detached house. My living room window is roughly two feet away from their front door.

My neighbours have 3 small children and they both smoke. Quite heavily. Not a problem at all, except that they stand outside of their front door to smoke. It carries the really strong smell of smoke in to my living room and my bedroom if the windows are open. I have had to start closing my windows and I really feel that I shouldn't have to in the summer. I wouldn't mind so much if it was once every couple of hours, but it is consistently every 10-15 minutes.

I appreciate that they don't smoke in front of their children. DH smokes, and he doesn't smoke in our home or in front of our DS either. He sits in the back garden, away from windows to smoke.

Am I being petty? Should I just keep my windows closed and suck it up?

You could politely ask them if they'd consider moving away from the door or smoking in the back garden as the smell is getting into your house, wouldn't be surprised if they won't though as they ARE outside.

But are you sure it's all them, surely your DH is bringing the smell into the house on his clothes?

If your dh smokes in the garden, then presumably it wafts into other people's gardens who are also trying to enjoy some fresh air? Perhaps your dh as well as your neighbours should take up 'vaping' instead!

Perhaps, LittleLion

It isn't my husband, he has been away with work since the neighbours moved in.

I am 100% sure it's the neighbours! I can see them, but as you say - they're outside, there's nothing really I can do!

I would hate this too, there's very little more grim that the smell of old smoke. I would very politely (maybe taking a 'welcome to your new home' bottle of wine/cake/chocolates to soften the blow) ask them to move away from the door, explaining why. But if they refuse then sadly there's not a lot else you can do, other than close your windows.

I really don't think smokers realise how bad the smell is and how far it travels / lingers. This is said as an ex smoker. My H still smokes and I hate it, it literally turns my stomach now. I can't believe I used to smell so bad

Should I just keep my windows closed and suck it up?

Why would this be your first thought, instead of 'Should I just nip round and ask them to smoke in the back garden'?

It turns my stomach too. I find the smell revolting!

For the same reason I asked on this thread in the first place, Worra. I really wasn't sure whether it would be unreasonable or not to ask.

The thing is, I don't actually think that my neighbours are being unreasonable at all. But I don't believe I am being unreasonable either. It's a hard situation, which is why I am struggling to decide whether it's worth acting on.

I don't think ywbu to have a word with them over it. If they're reasonable people they will try to make some adjustments. I also can't stand the stink as well.

So difficult! My dad is a heavy smoker and I feel for their neighbours!

He also comes to my house and thinks it's fine to stand in door way to continue inside house conversations whilst smoking, it stinks the house out! Every time I tell him to move / shut door and every time he still tries to do same thing. I hate, loathe and detest the smell of smoke in my house. I don't think smokers are aware at all.

Anyway, I'm not sure what you can do, as you say, they are outside in their garden so can do what they want. I feel your pain though!

I agree no-one's being unreasonable.

It could well be that they just don't know their smoke is drifting through your window, or it could be that as your DH smokes, they might think it's less of a problem.

That's why I think it would be ok to have a polite word, just so they're aware and then they can make their own minds up about what to do.

I'm a smoker and I'd still have a friendly word and ask if they could use their back garden instead. They are being quite thoughtless but I'd do my best not to phrase it like that if you want some cooperation.

If it was me, I think I'd put up 6ft fencing or something similar, as a physical barrier between the 2 front gardens. It won't look great but even 1 panel might be quite effective and it does sound grim - but it's not 'wrong' of them to do it and I'd feel rude asking them to stop/change where they smoke.

I'm in a similar position, but it's our downstairs neighbours, and they smoke at. The front and back door. We either smell it in our bedroom, which is fucking disgusting, and means we can never have the window open, or it goes into the dcs bedroom on the other side.

Ugh. Bloody disgusting.