Hello, you have a problem with your router

[LumelaMme]

I was expecting a call so I picked up the phone. It clicked and whirred, and then,
'Hello, you have a problem with your router.'
'No, I don't.'
'Madam, you have a technical issue with your router.'
'No, I don't.'
'Who told you you do not have a problem with the router?'
'Well, me, because it's working just fine.'
'I am calling about this problem-'
'No, you're not, you're calling to waste my time.'
'No, madam, about your router.'
'You're wasting my time but if you want to sit there and waste your own time too, that's fine by me...'
'Click.'
AIBU to be getting so bloody rude to cold callers?

Oops press post too soon said they'd to pay £500 to be able to keep getting their medication. Some fell for it and lost a lot of money others were so worried about money they stopped ordering their medication. Some ended up hospitalised.

I had one who tried to tell me I had a problem with a router I don't even own. It's even better when DH picks up the call because he's in IT and lets them give him the spiel before asking them technical questions. They usually hang up at that point.

FryOne - I probably haven't used the correct terminology. Here's a link to the gov.uk site: www.legislation.gov.uk/en/uksi/2013/3198/schedule/3/chapter/2/made

which shows that the Open Register is used to pick up ages of electors, albeit for "businesses selling age-restricted goods or services, such as alcohol and gambling online, to meet the rules on verifying the age of their customers".

I suspect that many older people won't have realised the need to tick the relevant opt-out box on the paper form, because that wasn't necessary back in the past. It's one of the ways that technology has advanced, but has left some people vulnerable.

Not cold caller related but having chuckled through the thread wanted to return the favour.

Spent good 20 minute trying to explain myself to an overseas call centre when I rang 3 customer service today.

When I told him for the millionth time he didn't understand when I was saying and I did STILL want to escalate my complaint, he assures me before transferring me across that he "trusts me from the bottom of his heart" seriously I nearly choked!

SideOrderofChips Please share what kind of technical questions your DH asks these scammers. Not that I've ever received one of these calls, just out of curiosity.

If 3yo DS is home, he loves to tell cold callers and scammers all about his day, will recite every single nursery rhyme he knows, or give them the whole story about how many Thomas trains he has.

I had one of the scammers the other night. I normally just call them fuckwits and hang up, but I'd had a few wines and was in a mood. I told the guy that I needed to verify his identity before I was allowed to do anything to my computer, and made him push about 100 buttons on his computer before he yelled at me and hung up. At least the ten minutes of his time I wasted is that many less calls he could make to annoy others.

Like Hassled, I don't use DH's surname, so when I answered a call from a Withheld number and the Indian voice asked if I was Mrs Husbandsname, I very nearly launched into my usual patter. Luckily, I held back, only to find it was DH's consultant ringing from the hospital

Oo Marion - lucky escape there!

This made me snort out loud:
dontcallmelen Tue 18-Aug-15 20:56:36
"Last cold call I had "hello madam you have recently been injured in a car accident" me - " yes thats right my head fell off" not had a call since."

Scammers make me sick.
I have been checking all my email accounts today because of the bloody hacker whose been in - and found a phishing email purporting to be from Paypal, and a hacked email from a friend in the UK. I've also had a previous phishing email supposedly from a racing stables in South Africa - that was exciting!

I feel so sorry for anyone who doesn't have the technical nouse to know when they're probably being scammed, it's upsetting. (this includes my Dad).

Oh and I forgot to mention the 3 emails from Apple telling me my account is suspended. Which is amazing, because I don't have an Apple account

Sometimes physhing can be difficult to distinguish from my normal emails.
How would you rate one froma NameExoWorlds contest? (It's to name extrasolar planets, btw)

I never answer my home phone as I don't give the number yo anybody, it's only there so I can get broadband, in case of a powercut and so I can find my mobile. On the rare occasion it does get answered it's a sales call/a scammer.

All my email addresses are ho tmail now - which are run through MS Outlook - whenever I see a dodgy looking email, I right click on it and then click on View Message Source - it brings up all the code in the email and you can see where the return email address etc. is, so you can generally work out from there whether or not it's genuine. I believe it doesn't actually open the email as such either, so no hidden viruses are activated. It can be hard to read to start with but it's worth doing, IMO.

I have enjoyed these.

Re emails, DH's techy advice is to NEVER open a zip attachment.

In the past week I have had emails supposedly from:

Barclays - about my bank account
HSBC - about my bank account
Paypal - about my account

Several headed "From Joe Bloggs*" which is the name of a friend of mine but they are NOT from him.

One from the "UN Compensation Fund"

All are binned upon receipt. I've told my friend his email has probably been hacked. I never open anything with an attachment. IF it is genuine, then the person/s can contact me by post.

*Not his real name

I haven't had any more phishing/hack type emails this week than normal, for which I'm profoundly grateful as it seems some folk who have been involved in the whole MN hack fiasco have suddenly seen a huge increase in spam and phishing emails.

My head is hurting from all this drama just now, I'm sure wankface is thrilled with himself.

WandaFuca Thanks for the list. DP and I opted out as soon as the opt out system started, but I think I'll check with parents that they've done the same.

Thank you for calling. I charge my time at £200 per hour so please let me have the number of your credit card.

Or a suggestion from another thread:

Arthur, at last, did you get the horseradish? and then bang on about the horseradish till they give up!

Ha ha. Loving some of these responses.

My favourite is when i get the accident claim calls.

"someone in your family has had an accident, you can claim for this"

me: "OMG! Who? Who had an accident? Are they okay?"

Click....

I let the answerphone pick up, anyone who actually needs me will start talking to it and then I answer.

We get loads at work though - I'm not sure of the wisdom of some of the callers. We are an IT/Software consultancy and the number of calls we've had telling us we have a virus beggar belief . The best of it is that they argue that we do, 'oh yes, you do...it will be catastrophic' . Why then are you calling from 'Microsoft' when we run Apple machines? Click.

On a more serious note, though, my dad was taken in by this scam and lost around £600.

I get so much email spam these days that it's almost impossible to find the genuine emails - some of it may well be due to the MN hacker (I'm on the list), but it has been increasing rapidly over the past couple of years. I suppose all it takes is a couple of missed tick boxes and you open yourself to 'information' from all and sundry.

I might try "my head fell off" next time though,