..to think I'm sliding into alcohol dependency.??

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Hi all. Ok I don't think I'm an actual alcoholic. I usually drink quite moderately, can take it or leave it, etc. However I am currently (initially voluntarily) unemployed, and am starting to find myself a) drifting during the day b) becoming demotivated c) drinking earlier and earlier in the day. I feel very aware that this is not a good progression, however am feeling a bit cut off from it all and in need of a kick up the arse. Anyone got any similar experience of needing to keep self-motivated/ pulling yourself out of a slippery slope? Know it sounds trivial, but am really aware of a slide away from discipline and reality (it's been about 7 months now- longer than I intended or expected) and am genuinely looking for support and guidance! Anyone been in this hole situation/ have any advice??

I'm starting to feel more and more (and earlier and earlier in day) that I just want to be DRUNK. It's becoming more and more compulsive. Am also smoking again, which I don't normally do. I know it's only me who can make my behaviour more positive, but would really welcome moral support from anyone who's ever felt the same.

You may or may not be starting to head in that direction but clearly you haven't slipped too far yet and the fact you have recognised you may have a problem is half the battle

It may help to apply some self - imposed rules to yourself at least until you get out of the current rut - e.g. no drinking before 7pm except on a weekend and ensuring you have at least 2 alcohol free days a week

Hi, thanks so much for the thoughtful responses. I suppose, on reflection, it's not really about drinking. It's unemployment. It's driving me crazy and I'm struggling now to stay on the ball and motivated. I think drinking is more of a symptom of that than anything. I literally am losing interest in EVERYTHING. Going out seems like a PITA. Socialising seems tiresome. I have to pull myself out of this.

Do you keep a stash of booze in the house? If so, stop. If you shop daily, try going for your groceries first thing in the morning (when you're sober and your willpower is strongest) and buy everything but alcohol. If it isn't in the house, it's obviously much easier to not drink.

Good luck. I think if you are firm with yourself and nip your drinking habit in the bud ASAP, it'll just be a tiny blip rather than anything more serious.

I can't relate to the drinking bit but pretty much had a nervous breakdown after being unemployed for 8 months. I couldn't motivate myself to do anything, stayed in bed till 2pm because otherwise the day was too long. I went to see a therapist, who was useless but the act of going to see her spurred me into action. Got a job washing dishes in a cafe (which I was mortified about) which gave me a routine and that was the catalyst to getting my motivation back. As a side note I was sick of people (my mum) telling me to do volunteer work - most places want a commitment and i felt I needed to be able to take any job that came along.

Try to find a hobby which keeps hands busy, such as crosstitch or knitting. Takes effort to put it down to pick up drink....

So right that alcohol is a slippery slope. I could happily have my first glass of wine at 4. I force myself to wait until 6 or 7.

I agree that busy hands are very good, as is a brisk walk at the bewitching hour.

Could you take up something like the couch to 5K? Running would make you feel much better about yourself and it's something free that you could do more than once a day. You could join a running club, too, which would give you some social interaction.

What are your skills? Do you want us to suggest things you could do to get back into work? Sometimes it's easy to go down the negative route.

I was going to suggest increasing your exercise, op.
I recognise myself in some of the things you describe, and I define myself as an alcoholic (though teetotal now, thankfully).
You might find this site helpful www.drinkaware.co.uk

I have a similar situation going on. Drinking to fill a void in my life and feeling like I might be losing control. I find reading a few sobriety blog helpful. I also listen to the Bubble Hour podcast which I find useful in keeping me focused on what could happen if I slide.

www.thebubblehour.com/?m=1

Logging what you are comsuming on the drinkaware app can be a real eye-opener, and might be motivation to moderate.

Especially as it tells you - as well as your number of units (banded green/amber/red over previous 7 days) - the number of calories/burgers, number of minutes running to offset, and price.

Come over to the Dry! thread.
Lots of lovely supportive people over there as well.

I know what you mean about wanting to be drunk earlier and earlier.
It was to shut off anxiety in my case and although I didn't ever go over 2 glasses a night /half bottle wine, it wasn't healthy.
Do you think you might be depressed ?
Lack of interest in anything can be a sign.

I stopped without too many issues and the reality that the anxiety was being caused by the alcohol was an eye opener.
If you are depressed the alcohol will drag you deeper into the spiral of depression.
Your GP can help, good luck OP.