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AIBU?

To spend so much on a hotel for dh's 40th next year?

56 replies

EmmaU123 · 14/08/2015 20:25

Basically my MiL and FiL have agreed to have our three children next May whilst I take dh away for three days to the Lake District. I wanted to really treat him considering it's his birthday and we haven't had a night out I thisbjosie alone in over 4 h'years and we've had a really shit year. I found an absolutely stunning hotel in Ambleside, it has every mid con, ie jacuzzi, stunning decor, circular rotating bed (lol), whirlpool bath that lights up and has a docking station so that you can playing lovely romantic music, mood lighting throughout the suite and best of all a completely free cocktail bar and mini bar.

Now like I said I've splashed out and it has cost me £840 for the weekend. Now to us that is slashing out as we aren't well off, at all but I've got 8 months to save up for it and we only have to pay on arrival (already paid £200 deposit) so it is doable. But I told my sister about it and all I got was hostility and her quizzing me about "how on earth we would afford it" and why why would I want to spend so much! I can't help feel a bit peeved with her as she's knows it a special occasion and what's more, it's got nothing to do with we really has it? It's like she never wants us to be happy as one odd occasion we've had something nice come out way she's always had something negative to say, so Aibu to rather peeved?

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BeaufortBelle · 14/08/2015 20:55

......it sounds a lot of money. My DH wouldn't have appreciated money being spent on that. But if yours would then it's absolutely the right thing to do. But, do you really need a rotating circular bed to have birthday sex?

Trying hard to remember DH's 40th. Was a long time ago. Clearly not very memorable. We probably took the DC to Chessington or something

happygirl87 · 14/08/2015 20:55

Please someone tell me the name of the hotel!

Dynomite · 14/08/2015 21:17

YANBU to splash out! YABVU to tell others how much expensive stuff cost because they will always have an opinion!...I've learned this the hard way. If my nosey parents/PIL ask me how much sth expensive was, I just shave off a few hundred quid to avoid the comments.

EmmaU123 · 14/08/2015 21:21

I don't usually talk about money, not at all but my sis asked so I didn't want to lie. And no lol, we don't need a rotating circular bed to do the deed, but it's what comes with the room, it was a deal breaker put it that way.

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mrsdavidbowie · 14/08/2015 21:24

Hope it rains everyday so you don't have to leave the room

EmmaU123 · 14/08/2015 21:25

And to be fair I want my dh's birthday to be as memorable as as possible. Time alone now a days is a rareity and considering for my 30th I had severe morning sickness and was in hospital and for his 30th he too was in hospital with meningitis (very scary, we almost lost him!) I want to make this weekend amazing and fun filled.

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EmmaU123 · 14/08/2015 21:26

Haha thanks Mrs!

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Blamenargles · 14/08/2015 21:28

I'm jealous love the lakes Ambleside is lovely. Such a beautiful place we was there last week.
Been twice this year but with the kids would love to go with just DP
You won't regret it

EmmaU123 · 14/08/2015 21:30

I agree, it is a gorgeous place. We went once by ourselves before we had our second child but that was a long time ago lol. We've taken the kids with us a couple of times but it's always nice to have a bit of alone time, especially if you get good weather.

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IamtheDevilsAvocado · 14/08/2015 21:44

Sounds a bit of greeneye! Never fails to amaze me how people get all passive agressive over others' spending. It really is personal choice.

A now ex very well off friend got very very angry when we went on a cruise..i think it was a case of she was fine as long as she was having the 'better things' with us poorer folks having a holiday under the underpass with the tramps!

What she didnt take into account:

It was our first holiday in 5 years.
we got a good deal last minute
It wasnt in school time
It came in cheaper than some self catering places!
Aldo neithet of us smoke or drink excessively, we also dont have expensive cars or hobbies. All of which rich friend did. Her fag bil alone was 200-250 monthly!

Hope you have a fabulous time!

HeyDuggee · 14/08/2015 21:45

Sorry OP, but if you have to "save up" for it, then I think it's money wasted. When you spend really hard earned money on something service-oriented, like a hotel (because let's face it, you are paying for the service as much as the decor)... you are going to be disappointed.

I've stayed in places that retail £400 a night and thought, I'd be livid if I was paying my own money for this....it's as good as the £150 a night place down the road, etc.

BettyCatKitten · 14/08/2015 21:55

Yanbu, tell her to butt out. I hope you have a lovely time

ThisNameIsBetterThanMyRealOne · 14/08/2015 22:10

Sorry OP, but if you have to "save up" for it, then I think it's money wasted.

What a load of bollocks!

I was on free holiday to Las Vegas (My first ever trip abroad at the age of 30) when it was dp's 40th, I knew in advance that we were going so I saved my money to give him something special for his birthday.
I paid for a Helicopter ride over to Arizona for the day, returning at night and flying down the strip, How can that possibly be money wasted? It was money well spent and memories which will last forever.

I hope you both have a great time op, The Lakes is beautiful and I'm sure it will be worth every penny, tell your sis to mind her own :)

ilovesooty · 14/08/2015 22:13

Why did you tell your sister how much it was costing? Of course it's not her business but you didn't have to give her so much information.
Since you asked if you're being unreasonable none if us are in your position so we can't judge can we?
Not something I'd spend money on but I'm not you of course. For that money I'd want a week away somewhere.

Muchtoomuchtodo · 14/08/2015 22:15

I'm saving up for a trip away for my 40th next year. I am very much looking forward to it and don't consider it a waste at all.

YANBU OP. I hope you both have a wonderful time.

ThisNameIsBetterThanMyRealOne · 14/08/2015 22:18

Can someone please link to the Hotel?

EmeraldKitten · 14/08/2015 22:21

I love the LD but I really couldn't bring myself to spend that much on a weekend for two there tbh.

You could have a look at flights and whip him off to Paris for that! It wouldn't be a luxury hotel obviously but still!

RhinestoneCowgirl · 14/08/2015 22:22

DH is 40 next month, I am spending similar amount on weekend away in UK. Don't think it's a waste in any way!

I'm looking forward to some very rare child free time with just the two of us in a lovely place and so should you...

mrsdavidbowie · 14/08/2015 22:23

I'd rather be holed up in a fabulous hotel, shagging the man I love senseless, than
Wandering round the Louvre

PiperChapstick · 14/08/2015 22:25

YANBU I've stayed at Langdale and its worth every penny. Enjoy!!

EmmaU123 · 14/08/2015 22:32

I only have to "save up" because we are currently living on my dh's salary alone as opposed to a few years back when we were both working full time at which point i could have paid the £800 in one go. I know it's expensive and your right, I could have gotten flights abroad for less but we can't leave the country and leave our kids incase something happens with our youngest, at least by staying in the UK we could get home quickly if needed.

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EmmaU123 · 14/08/2015 22:33

Haha you make me laugh MRS!!!

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ThreeQuartersEmpty · 14/08/2015 22:57

You sound very sensible. Saving up for a treat and not putting it on credit card.
She sounds jealous. Ignore, and have a lovely time.

PingpongDingDong · 14/08/2015 23:03

It's entirely up to you. I think it sounds amazing and Ambleside is fabulous anyway. Sometimes it's nice to save up and do something really special.

TurnOffTheTv · 14/08/2015 23:06

We went to Gilpin Lodge in The lakes for three nights and it cost 1k. It was a one off, and total luxury. I'd go again in a heartbeat.

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