To think shouting and swearing during an argument...

[LunaSonny]

Is unnacceptable, shows poor communication skills, and above all is so disrespectful?!!
Everytime DP and I have a disagreement he ends up shouting and calls me all sorts of names. Nothing I can say to him can make understand him hurtful I find it. He says I 'push him to it' because I 'don't know when to stop', almost as though I deserve this kind of treatment and the problem lies with me. Its not like I purposely try and push his buttons until he flies into a rage.
He always says sorry (eventually,begrudgingly) and says he didnt mean what he said but AIBU to think you dont have to resort to anger and insults to make your self heard or try and 'win' an argument??

Arguments between colleagues are very different to arguments between spouses though. The relationship just isn't the same...we do an awful lot with our spouses that we wouldn't do at work.

I don't shout when I argue but can certainly be aggressive with it. And before I acknowledged this in myself, I did sometimes argue a partner into a corner, even following them to another room because I was so determined to get my point across. Not having resorted to shouting and swearing when they did doesn't mean I didn't behave appallingly.

I agree the name calling isn't on in any circumstance, but I disagree that swearing is out of line. Swear words are a facet of our language, one that is very well suited to showing frustration.