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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not call the HV back?

75 replies

Lovemcgarrett · 12/08/2015 21:49

After a couple of accidents and a couple of broken bones in the last fortnight, the HV has called for "a chat". This is the same HV who I made it very clear a couple of years ago after her "helpful comments" that I didn't want to see again.
Do I have to call her back? Any implications of I don't? They were genuine accidents to a very accident prone child (I know it sounds a lot!) but this HV is awful (she told me to shut my daughter in her room and just let her cry rather than cosleep as she was 4).

OP posts:
Asleeponasunbeam · 12/08/2015 21:51

You probably ought to just phone, to explain the unfortunate accidents.

Asleeponasunbeam · 12/08/2015 21:52

Hope the DC is okay now.

littleducks · 12/08/2015 21:53

Prob best to phone. chances are you will just leave a message anyway

Anniesaunt · 12/08/2015 21:55

I understand why you don't like her but I think under the circumstances you need to call back or it will look bad. Phone, explain what happened and get it over with.

PuntasticUsername · 12/08/2015 22:03

Could you ask to talk to a different HV?

Hezaire · 12/08/2015 22:03

I saw hv the other day.
She said if kids ever break a bone they are obliged to call.

Hezaire · 12/08/2015 22:04

A legal thing??

Or a health visitor rule at least. Child protection and all that. I hate the hv visits but for an easy life put up with the call

BarbarianMum · 12/08/2015 22:07

You should phone - if only to ask to see a different HV . If you don't it will raise a red flag.

Original poster
Lovemcgarrett · 12/08/2015 22:08

Thanks, might leave a message out of hours. The woman tried turning up a few times after I asked her not to call again. I have requested another in the past but requests were ignored. I understand there is a protocol and it is there for a reason but this woman just winds me up and is a true clash of personalities!

OP posts:
Pseudonym99 · 12/08/2015 22:08

Refuse to speak to them just to wind them up. Get them to take a court order out to come and visit you. And then explain to them the accidental nature of the injuries before telling them to fuck off.

Purplepoodle · 12/08/2015 22:09

could you go and see your gp instead and have a chat with them?

Muchtoomuchtodo · 12/08/2015 22:09

Just phone and explain. You don't need to accept any visits.

Hope your LO is alright

Anniesaunt · 12/08/2015 22:10

That sounds like a very stressful and long winded way to prove a point pseudo.

Purplepoodle · 12/08/2015 22:10

"Refuse to speak to them just to wind them up. Get them to take a court order out to come and visit you. And then explain to them the accidental nature of the injuries before telling them to fuck off."

useful way to waste nhs money rather than a simple phonecall

UrethraFranklin1 · 12/08/2015 22:11

Refuse to speak to them just to wind them up. Get them to take a court order out to come and visit you. And then explain to them the accidental nature of the injuries before telling them to fuck off.

Oh great advice. Waste huge amounts of everyones time and public money just to get your own back because you dont like one person. Hmm And it won't at all make you look like a total loon who warrants even more involvement from social services etc.

sharonthewaspandthewineywall · 12/08/2015 22:11

If someone doesn't call me back I will try once again. If still no response we have to follow a no access policy if there are no other concerns which involves just informing the team leader and filling out a form. Only if it was a family we had concerns about or were receiving enhanced service would we need to escalate. It's just policy to see how your child is.

DurhamDurham · 12/08/2015 22:12

I'd ring as it will just escalate if you don't and will make things much more stressful for both of you than it needs to be. One phone call, job done.

sharonthewaspandthewineywall · 12/08/2015 22:13

Pseudonym why would it wind them up? Trust me there are plenty of other things to follow up on!

Duckstar · 12/08/2015 22:16

Absolutely standard procedure round here for any A and E admission to be followed up
by HV. With good reason. Many of the recent fatal child abuse cases have highlighted lack of co-operation between agencies.

If you don't call back it will raise flags. Do you have well baby clinics/a duty number? You don't need to speak to specify HV just one of the team. My DS2 was recently in hospital for breathing difficulties. Got a call from HV (who is lovely), but I was passing local clinic and just dropped in and talked to a HV there and said could they let x know that I'd been in.

Duckstar · 12/08/2015 22:17

specific

Original poster
Lovemcgarrett · 12/08/2015 22:26

Thanks Sharon and everyone. DC is 4. We have a follow up with hospital. Bit the bullet and left a message saying thanks for concern but he is ok, has a follow up at hospital and no need for a visit.

OP posts:
Penfold007 · 12/08/2015 22:33

OP sorry but two accidents and two broken bones I'd be visiting to cover my back.

jaffacake2 · 12/08/2015 22:44

Health visitors work under safeguarding policies not just trying to wind you up. In UK if a child attends a&e a health visitor will be notified. Most cases are accidental injuries but sadly some are not.I think that those vulnerable children deserve to be protected and health visitors are part of that team.

DurhamDurham · 12/08/2015 22:48

A message is a good first step but the HV may need to speak to you so I wouldn't consider all done and dusted just yet.

PiperIsTerrysChoclateOrange · 12/08/2015 22:48

What have you got to hide.

Let the hv come before SS become involved