To ask you to help me with my evening routine?

[Poppy1983]

I have two dds, youngest has just turned two and oldest is nearly 6. I am a sahm and DP works in our busy town centre. As the parking there is so expensive I collect DP from work at 5.30 (it's a 15 minute drive). There is no direct bus route to our house. My current routine is not working as dds are getting over tired and fall asleep in the car at 5.15 and over hungry. This is my current routine:
3.45pm get in from school and dds have snack (cereal bar)
4.00pm baths and any reading/homework
5.15pm collect DP
5.45 cook
6.15 eat then clean up
7.15 dds upstairs to get change and read story brush teeth etc
8pm lights out

I then have to wake dds at 7am to take DP to work and they are over tired.

What could I do differently?

Is there another way for your DH to get to or from work? Even one way would help. If transport is a nightmare could he car share?

I wouldn't give up family meals if you can help it.

Clean up after the kids are in bed.

Don't bath every night.

Bath time should really help them wind down, it's a very last-thing-at-night thing, so I'm not surprised it isn't working with the bath coming before leaving the house and eating.

Always does the opposite for my DCs.

Kafri what the fuck? Take a breath!

Or some valium.

You've had some helpful suggesti one but they are all just sticking plasters and don't address the real problem which is that running your husband to and from work with 2 children in tow just isn't practical or sustainable in the long term. Isn't there any other way for him to get to work? Is there a bus stop or train station he could run / cycle to? Surely there must be some form of public transport somewhere nearby?

OP I wouldn't worry about a "them and us" dinner situation although it's hardly a great description. It sounds like it would be better for the DC as well as for you.

Fwiw DH and I work full time although we have some flexibility. Probably 3 nights a week the children eat before us although one of us will be there with them. We get sold the idea that the whole family must eat dinner together each evening but that often isn't doable for lots of families.

Of course this situation with drop offs and pick ups won't always be practical as the DC get older so likely DH will need to start considering alternatives.