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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think he should claim job seekers

29 replies

starrieskye · 07/08/2015 21:24

Aibu to think he should put in a claim for jsa not keep thinking he'll get a job any day. Filled with great plans but no money, £400 left and nothing else.

OP posts:
Boofy27 · 07/08/2015 21:27

Of course he should but if he doesn't, you need to find out what you can claim yourself for being in a incomeless household.

Original poster
starrieskye · 07/08/2015 21:28

I'm not entitled to anything it's him.

OP posts:
GarminGirl · 07/08/2015 22:16

aren't you? jobseekers yourself?

Original poster
starrieskye · 07/08/2015 22:20

no i work ft

OP posts:
ToadsJustFellFromTheSky · 07/08/2015 22:25

Who is "he"? Your DP?

If it's your DP and you work full time then he might not be eligible for JSA anyway.

I'm sure someone with more knowledge on this will come along soon though.

Original poster
starrieskye · 07/08/2015 22:26

He doesn't live with me

OP posts:
ilovesooty · 07/08/2015 22:27

He probably won't be eligible for income based JSA but could presumably claim contribution based JSA.

ToadsJustFellFromTheSky · 07/08/2015 22:28

In that case he should claim.

ilovesooty · 07/08/2015 22:29

Cross post. I see he doesn't live with you. In that case he can presumably make the decision himself but will surely have to claim once his money runs out.

Original poster
starrieskye · 07/08/2015 22:33

I'm so worried about it

OP posts:
marriednotdead · 07/08/2015 22:37

But it's not for you to worry about, can you not see that?

Sometimes you have to step back and let people make their own decisions, and let them live with the consequences.

If they've decided not to worry, advise them once and then leave them to it.

GarminGirl · 07/08/2015 22:39

why are you worried?

KirstyJC · 07/08/2015 22:39

Will he be expecting you to pay his way if/when the money runs out? I can see that might be worrying you. Make it clear you won't be subbing him and then leave him to it.

LIZS · 07/08/2015 22:40

Not clear how this affects you if you are not together. It wouldn't be a significant amount even assuming he qualifies.

Original poster
starrieskye · 07/08/2015 22:40

I have to, I promised I would look after him. I just can't see how he's ever going to get a job, again.

OP posts:
GarminGirl · 07/08/2015 22:42

promised??

KirstyJC · 07/08/2015 22:51

Well, break your promise. He needs to look after himself - and take responsibility for himself by claiming the benefits he needs not sponging off you.

There's nothing wrong with you helping out if you can afford to and want to, but if he is not claiming money he ought to be and expecting you to make it up instead out of a sense of 'duty' then he can go whistle! Why would you promise anyway? Is there some problem with him? Why wouldn't he ever get a job again?

ilovesooty · 07/08/2015 22:52

Why is looking after him your responsibility when he can claim jsa and you don't live together?

Original poster
starrieskye · 07/08/2015 22:54

I promised my mum and dad. I don't know what to do.

OP posts:
RJnomore · 07/08/2015 22:56

Is this your brother?

ilovesooty · 07/08/2015 22:56

Not your partner then.

Really, it isn't your responsibility. He needs to claim if he's eligible.

GarminGirl · 07/08/2015 22:57

I'm confused...who has the £400?

KirstyJC · 07/08/2015 22:58

Who is he to you - is it your brother? Are your parents still around and able to help?

Helping someone doesn't mean paying for them so that they can ignore their responsibilities - it means allowing them to learn to manage their own life. Including messing it up by running out of money by not doing what they should do.

If you can't afford it, then don't. And give his arse a kick!

ToadsJustFellFromTheSky · 07/08/2015 23:09

Well I'm really confused now OP.

Who is he exactly? Is he your brother?

Becca19962014 · 07/08/2015 23:13

OP I think you need to post more information for people to help. It sounds like this person is a relative? Hence the promise made to your parents to look after him. Is there a reason for that? Is the reason why he left his last job (you mentioned being worried about him getting another job).

Obviously you just need to put as much information as you are comfortable doing on this thread, but it's hard to advise or say if you are being unreasonable without more information.