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AIBU?

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Original poster

My cleaner refuses to call me by my name!

39 replies

cavkc · 06/08/2015 20:05

I'm finding this a little odd but would appreciate the thoughts of others.

I employed a new cleaner a couple of weeks ago and whilst she is good at what she does, she insists on calling me Madam. I've asked her to call me by my name but she just won't .. Apparently she prefers the distinction between her working life and home life.

My husband was around today and she called him Sir even though I introduced him by his name (I have a sneaky feeling he rather enjoyed that lol)

It just makes me feel really uncomfortable in my own home but not sure what I can do apart from telling her it's not working out.

She also gave me a typed list of jobs she won't do, including toilets, cooker, inside of kitchen units etc etc (she didn't mention this when I interviewed her)

Should I stick with her a bit longer or not?

BrewWineWine

OP posts:
DinosaursRoar · 06/08/2015 22:31

hmm, a cleaner who doesn't clean toilets, I've heard of them, they tend to be rather reluctant to be cleaners and don't tend to do a good job overall as they do seem to think actual cleaning is beneath them.

The fact you currently will give your bathroom a once over before hand isn't the point, many people hire cleaners for different reasons, some because they are just don't have the time to clean or some because they don't want to, but many people employ cleaners because they can't clean themselves (often due to mobilty issues that arent always as apparent at first glance), if she is being hired to clean the house, she's being hired to clean the house and should be prepared to do it, or as much as possible in the time the person hiring her is paying for (and if that's not enough time to do the whole house, she should ask what the homeowner wants to be the priority).

I refuse to believe any office or pub would hire a cleaner who'd refuse to clean the toilets.

Anyway, get rid, she's clearly doesn't really want the job, hire someone who wants it, is prepared to call you by your name, is prepared to do the work they are being paid to do. Use an agency if you can't find someone directly.

GlitterNails · 06/08/2015 22:41

Really, MsMcWoodle? As a severely disabled person who employs a cleaner, I would be pretty upset if she turned around and said I should clean my own.

To me it's a normal day-to-day task along with hoovering, dusting and wiping down surfaces.

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 06/08/2015 23:25

She refuses to address you by your preferred name, which under ECHR everyone is entitled to.
There are also aspects of cleaning that she won't do. Erm am I missing something. As her employer you call the shots

maggieryan · 06/08/2015 23:30

Never been called madam in my life. It's like in crèches. They never call me by my name. Its always "mammy, can you bring in more nappies" or "mammy, Maggie was out of sorts (bold) today. Same as maternity hospitals. Btw would love a cleaner. Count yourself LuckySmile

GemmeFatale · 07/08/2015 00:17

I'd get rid. You obviously aren't comfortable with her or you wouldn't be posting on here. She failed to disclose at interview she'll only do half a job and she's now making you uncomfortable in your own home.

mimishimmi · 07/08/2015 01:08

I wouldn't care what she prefers to call me but I'd be hiring a cleaner expecting them to do the 'deep cleaning'.

Gruntfuttock · 07/08/2015 01:36

It's horrible being called 'Madam' when you'd prefer the person to use your name. My MIL always addressed me as 'Madam', and yes, I am serious.

Moopsboopsmum · 07/08/2015 02:04

Is she from the Philipines? If so this is completely normal. The not cleaning the loos though? No sorry, let her go.

Original poster
cavkc · 07/08/2015 08:53

I think she's Indian but I could be wrong

I employ her twice a week for 4 hours (8hrs total) at £10 ph (seems to be the going rate around here)

That's to clean, change beds and ironing (her ironing is spectacular!!)

I get the impression she sees herself as a housekeeper rather than a cleaner

OP posts:
BallsforEarrings · 07/08/2015 18:40

I don't understand, did you find her by her website or word of mouth, was she selling cleaning services or a housekeeping service. This doesn't sound right to me?

I'm struggling to get why toilets are not within her service list, they are a basic part of a cleaning service.

She seems very unprofessional to me and I wouldn't trust her if she hadn't produced her service list at the point of sale but AFTER the agreement, that is unfair and wrong.

Also I think a service list should include what you DO offer first not just what isn't available, that again sounds a negative and unprofessional way to present services to the customer.

I'm all for being clear as to what's being offered to clients but this seems a little odd. What's wrong with cleaning toilets, sounds like she just doesn't want to which is fine but plenty of cleaners will include this as basic.

SlayZ · 07/08/2015 18:51

You pay £80 a week for a cleaner????

I will do anything for that price. Take me instead!

On a serious note, how big is your house?

firesidechat · 07/08/2015 19:52

Toilets are a deep cleaning job TheHouse? Really?

Marmitelover55 · 07/08/2015 19:55

Blimey - how big is your house? Shock 8 hours seems extreme!

nickelbabe · 07/08/2015 21:01

Your list is basically what I would class as cleaning.

I wouldn't bother hiring a cleaner to dust and hoover! (unless i was physically incapable of doing those, which i'm not i'm just a lazy fucker )

The onyl thing on your list that i would say was deepclean was the oven - the hob i would class as standard cleaning.

Idon't think your issue is what she calls you - your issue is the fact taht you've employed someone who refuses to do the job for which you're employing her.
Sack her and hire an actual cleaner

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