To ask for a woop woop on the day I got my first buggy shaming?

[toomuchtooold]

I've waited so long for this day to arrive - my kids are really growing up! I was picking blackberries with my 3y3m old twins in a quiet pedestrianised lane near our house and a woman cycled past us, stopped, looked back, shook her head, said "those children are too old to need a buggy" and cycled off.

Dear cycling lady, I've no doubt that at 3 and a bit your wonderful children were doing 6 mile hikes through the Schwarzwald (we live at the Swiss/German border), but I also suspect that if they were tired you gave them the odd sneaky carry. Which I cannot do with 2 15kg kids, not at the same time. Also, when we are waiting for the tram it really helps to only have to keep my eye on one stationary object instead of two that move randomly in different directions.

Anyway, it's cool, it's just funny. Loads of people on here have posted about getting judged when they went out with a buggy and a tall two year old and I was like . I get it now!

[PHANTOMnamechanger]

seriously ducky ??
How rude!
OP sounds like she is being very sensible - her twins are safe in a buggy where they can't run off. She cant physically carry them both, or even hold one still while comforting one who has fallen etc. Nothing about being lazy and how on earth can you assume her kids are on the road to obesity.

[PHANTOMnamechanger]

and of course it's just rude and judgemental to comment, for all the same reasons that you don;t comment on seemingly able bodied people parking in disabled bays and using disabled loos, and other reasons.

the cycling woman has NO IDEA of the childrens health, or their mothers for that reason. what if she is physically unable to lift them, or to run after them. some people just need to MTOB and resist the urge to comment on everyone elses lives and choices

[MrsHathaway]

People who usually walk use buggies.

People who usually use cars don't.

Which children do we think are actually en route to obesity?

[AugustHasToBeBetter]

Exactly MrsH, a non-driver who walks a lot, I used buggies for my children for ages but they weren't always in them, far from it.

They still walk a lot to this day (unlike a lot of their peers!)

[noeffingidea]

duckydinosaur none of my kids are obese, lazy or idle. But carry on being ignorant if it makes you happy.

[redredread]

I have two DCs,18 months apart. My younger DC is 4, and small for his age. I still take a little buggy along if we're walking more than a couple of miles (fairly routine), carrying a lot of stuff, or either/both child is particularly tired. That's when one starts bolting, whilst the other lies on the pavement in immovable protest. I could alternatively deal with this by driving those journeys. But I'd rather walk and use public transport. I do sometimes end up pushing an child free buggy for quite long stretches, whilst they wander/run along happily.

People who judge me for any of this are welcome to a long and tedious explanation (including details of the hip pain I get carrying a child for any great distance). They should all mind their own business.

[JammyGeorge]

I used the double buggy until ds1 was nearly 4. It was nothing to do with his ability to walk and all about restraining him. He was a bolter and couldn't be trusted to walk sensibly alongside ds2's single buggy so it was used in town/shops/roads.

I also used it if walking into town and back which is 2 miles either way and a bit much.

No one ever said anything, if they had I would of probably told them to fuck off - I found going anywhere with ds1 a nightmare.

On the flip side Ds2 is 2.5 and I've not used a buggy for months unless it was a long walk, he's a dream, he never leaves my side.

Either way anyone that makes remarks to someone managing 3 year old twins needs to give their head a shake.

[Slippersandacuppa]

I would LOVE to hop in the buggy sometimes, and I'm 39 and perfectly capable of walking several miles.

My eldest, when he was six, had an emergency appendectomy. On the school run the next day (his brothers' - I kindly let him have a week off), a lady commented that he was far too old to be in there. He was pale, half asleep and still had his hospital bracelet on. I told her exactly what had happened and she had the good grace to look marginally embarrassed.

[FixItUpChappie]

You don't need to justify or explain in any way OP. It was a bitchy, rude and totally uncalled for judgement - biker cow should mind her own business full stop.

[DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen]

Mrs Hathaway is correct , it's usually the walkers who have buggies and the car drivers who spout utter shite about obesity

[tobysmum77]

My 3.5 year old is perfectly capable of walking 6 miles.

It's none of her business, however.

[DustBunnyFarmer]

There's 2y8m between my two. The little one was desperate to get out walking once he was toddling and would do so for miles (honestly) without complaint - his big brother used to get in the buggy as it was all too much and his legs were tired, his feet hurt yada yada. I am sure there are people who judged me. I miss having a nifty shopping trolley that I can take from shop to shop now they're big.

[SusanHollander]

As someone with less than a year between my two, it would be dangerous not to use the buggy at times! Plus it takes for-bloody-ever to get anywhere on foot with little ones. I can do the nursery run in 10 minutes with DS in the pram and DD on the buggy board but if she walks it's at least 30 minutes....seriously, if I let her walk everywhere we'd always be late and I'd be more stressed. She dawdles like mad and stops to pick up or examine every sodding twig or leaf. Sometimes you just want to enjoy something without having to rugby tackle a bolting toddler. I can't spend time looking at anything in public let alone pick blackberries unless they're restrained...DD has no sense of danger whatsoever and just wanders off and DS thinks it's hilarious to bolt.

Who are these interfering pillocks who stop strangers to give their opinion and why don't they come and see me? I would have a field day!

[meglet]

no one ever judged me .

ds was still in and out of the back p&t seat at 4.5yrs. an elderly lady came over to speak to us during one outing and I thought she was going to grumble. I instead she said she thought our p&t double was wonderful and she wished they had them in her day.

[tobysmum77]

Well yes containment is one of the biggest factors re buggies. I am always at these 20 month olds who apparently walk everywhere in the right direction

[KevinKnowsImMiserableNow]

I occasionally used to hoof my 2yo out the buggy so the 4yo could get in it on her way home from school when she was in reception and exhausted (August baby so v young for her year!)

[Psycobabble]

Ds is tall ! Age 4 is in 6 year old clothes !!

The looks Id get!!

At just turned 3 (and still likely to get extremely tired when walking any distance ) looking about 5 in his buggy

The "why is you child not at school and also why is he still in a buggy" look

[HelsBels3000]

My just turned 4yo DD made full use of her baby brother's buggy today - we walked miles around a forest and her legs were tired. I don't give a shit if anyone thinks she lazy and idle - if her legs were tired then why not let her sit down? Its just mean to force her to walk and scream and strop and stamp feet if she's asked nicely and she's genuinely tired.

[cherrybakewelltart]

My dd has just turned 3 and she refuses to walk anywhere. A minute after we leave she is begging to be picked up, standing in front of us and eventually parking her arse on the floor refusing to budge. I am genuinely in awe of these 3 year olds who walk miles, what is the secret? I want to ditch the pushchair!

Back on topic, some people are just rude, but I'm paranoid people are thinking the same things about my dd she is a small one though

[tobysmum77]

you see in an entirely non judgey way isn't it a good thing to tire three year olds out walking? So they go to bed nicely at 7..

[tobysmum77]

hellsbells you have to be very firm I think....

[tobysmum77]

sorry I meant cherrybakewell, user name confusion

[youarekiddingme]

Is remember being buggy shamed for not putting DS in the buggy

I use to take it and use it to carry bags - so I could chase DS hands free if needed! Always wore a across body handbag.

DS is autistic and when he was that age (and still at 10!) couldn't walk and would hop skip and jump everywhere. Some interfering old bat kindly older lady told me I should be carrying the bags and strapping ds in if he couldn't behave
(In his defence he walked when told - it's just it lasted about 3 seconds!)

[MinesAPintOfTea]

Its nearly a mile to ds's (3.5) nursery, and about a 20minute adult walk. He runs until he's tired then I fling him in the buggy and get him there with enough time to catch my train. The rest of his friends arw transported in cars, which do you think do the least moving ducky?

[AlisonBlunderland]

Of course 3 year old twins are capable of walking.
Depends on whether you want to get to the shops and back before it gets dark