To ask for a woop woop on the day I got my first buggy shaming?

[toomuchtooold]

I've waited so long for this day to arrive - my kids are really growing up! I was picking blackberries with my 3y3m old twins in a quiet pedestrianised lane near our house and a woman cycled past us, stopped, looked back, shook her head, said "those children are too old to need a buggy" and cycled off.

Dear cycling lady, I've no doubt that at 3 and a bit your wonderful children were doing 6 mile hikes through the Schwarzwald (we live at the Swiss/German border), but I also suspect that if they were tired you gave them the odd sneaky carry. Which I cannot do with 2 15kg kids, not at the same time. Also, when we are waiting for the tram it really helps to only have to keep my eye on one stationary object instead of two that move randomly in different directions.

Anyway, it's cool, it's just funny. Loads of people on here have posted about getting judged when they went out with a buggy and a tall two year old and I was like . I get it now!

[MostlyCake]

Saltyseabird same here my just turned 2 ds will not use the buggy but also won't walk very far. No matter how far we walk he has to be carried at least halfway there and all the way home on our shoulders and he weighs a TON. No solution but I feel your pain

[toomuchtooold]

Let me be 'that' person who says my dc3 is 3 years 3 months and it's a year since we used a buggy for her. And I don't drive. And she walked four miles without complaining a couple of weeks ago. She's not especially advanced for her age, small physically and has a hole in her heart.

johnny props to your daughter, but why does her ability to walk 4 miles mean that I shouldn't take my buggy out when I take my girls out for a day out? Why should I negotate two three year olds, a massive changing bag, a picnic and a blanket through the supermarket, via the park, to the post office and then to the zoo (that's what we did on Monday) when I can instead take the buggy, shove all the crap underneath, and let the girls hop in and out when they want and when we have to wait at e.g. the busy tram stop? Different days out, different family structure, different circumstances - so there is a wide variation in what's appropriate, and your daughter walking 4 miles is fine, and me taking the buggy out is also fine.

[YeOldeTrout]

That comment doesn't sound in the slightest bit rude or shaming to me, Frusso. Maybe you left out the bit where he sneered it at you.

[Spindelina]

I don't use a buggy - never really have (mainly because of the large number of steps between my front door and the pavement). But I get sling shamed quite a lot (DD is just 3). Mostly not from strangers, though. I don't own a car; we do long distances; yada yada as above but with a sling instead of a buggy.

I often ask whether they would say the same if I were using a buggy. From this thread, it sounds like actually they might! Oh well. I'd still rather have DD in a sling than on my shoulders / in my arms / being dragged by the arm.

[SaltySeaBird]

Thanks Notso, MrsFfrumble and toomuchtooold

We do have a trike but it's not good on rough terrain and she is always getting on and off it. We also have a scooter which is a bit better but I'm not keen on using it on narrow pavements alongside the road.

I think we need to try again as she is too heavy to carry (and early days but DC2 on the way). She won't like it though and she seems to have the capacity to scream for a long time!

[Aridane]

What's a 'woop woop'?

[toomuchtooold]

Salty mine are now allowed to come and go as they please from the buggy and that seems to suit them. They did hate it for a while and would ask to be carried but with two of them I could only insist that they walked or took the buggy. They still take the piss at the weekend when DH is around and they can cadge a carry off of each of us...

[Mrsfrumble]

Salty DD went through a phase of that when she'd just turned 2. She'd scream "I NOT A BABY! LET ME OUT!", but then refuse to walk and insist on being carried. Fabulous toddler logic! We got one of these which she very happy to ride on. I don't know if they sell them in the UK, but there might be something similar.

She's 2.9 now and once again happy to ride in the pushchair for long distances.

[Notso]

Salty DS2 was the same, I just persevered with him in the buggy kicking, screaming etc and developed a thick skin to the inevitable tuts and stares. He has always been a brilliant walker but only on his terms, a ten minute walk through the park can take 40 minutes with him. I used to have to fasten the straps really tight, lie it back and push the buggy on it's back wheels only to stop him climbing out.
When I had to pick DS1 up from school it was a case of shrieking child manhandled into the buggy or poor DS1 picked up late again.

[Pythonesque]

Oh, meant to say, thanks for the heads up about ripe blackberries - now I know what to send me kids out for when they say they're bored! (eldest nearly 13 and do we ever know it ..._

[Pythonesque]

hazeyjane :) at the "on your bicycle" comment - I guess the retort should have been along the lines of "we're still waiting for the adapted one" (not that I ever think of good responses till ages after they are needed!)

My two were both around 21 kg at 3.5 and about that time I could no longer carry them on the bicycle seat, was very glad to get them on a tagalong at 4. With nearly 3 years between them we managed without a double buggy but I had thought seriously about getting one (till I discovered that eldest would be too big to fit in many). Eldest was back in buggy for a while at nearly 4 due to illness though.

I didn't have it as hard as my mother did with me though - age 3 I had poor balance and little speech due to ear problems, so if I ran off couldn't be called back. But was big enough that she had to carry my birth certificate in order not to be charged a child's fare on the bus. And when I started school, young in year, someone took one look at me and said "the primary school's that side" (ie year 3 up).

[thatsshallot]

Blackberry vodka/gin - just shove a load of berries in a bottle of spirit of choice with a load of sugar, shake loads and stick in dark cupboard, shaking whenever you remember.

after a couple of months taste and poss add more sugar, then strain through muslin and rebottle, drink at Christmas and it's delish

[m0therofdragons]

We've just started getting blackberries in Somerset

[Ledkr]

We are taking it to a festival soon to smuggle our drinks in and so she can sleep if we stay out late.
Matvelous things they are.

[Ledkr]

My dd is 4 but will happily jump into the buggy at every opportunity she can yet this is a child who is on the go constantly.
I like it to carry things too, we are on holiday in France ATM and last night I carried beer and wine in it back from the super u

[SaltySeaBird]

I'm just at all of you who can get your older children into a buggy still. DD has refused since 18 months old to go in one - and I mean full hysterics for the duration, requiring multiple people to force her in and then twisting, thrashing, screaming get me out, help me.

I haven't even owned one since before she was two and glance jealously at people with older children who do go in one.

I have to take a rucksack instead of bag everywhere, and have a bad back as a result of carrying an almost three year old a lot when she gets tired (she just lies down and screams I'm too tired to walk).

I am at my wits end with it but nobody has any suggestions on how I can change it.

[tobysmum77]

Tizwailer I'm not convinced that having no sense of danger at 3 only applies to those with autism .....

[JasperDamerel]

My kids both used a buggy until they could competently ride a bike because we travel long distances without a car or public transport.
DS didn't really need a buggy when he was 5, but I still hung on to it for when he was ill so that he didn't have to walk several miles to the the doctor, or to take him home if he was ill at school. As it turns out, he has managed a year without illness, but it certainly came in handy for his big sister at the same age.

[HexU2]

Had family like this who we ended up on holiday with - oh no you won't need a buggy. Two days of carrying the youngest and they were suddenly behind the idea of hiring one .


I've yet to receive a decent explanation as to why strapping children into a car and driving them 2 miles to the shops in the rain does not make them fat and idle, but pushing them in a buggy does

^^ Yup.

Now there are older they walk everywhere for miles and will go all day - but you'd never have thought that from the comments we got.

[MakeItACider]

Blackberry vodka?

Do you just shove a whole lot of blackberries into vodka, close bottle and let it stew?

My Terrys chocolate orange dishwasher vodka was a hit at the last mum's night out.......

I even found some wild raspberry bushes recently.

[Twentyninedays]

Ds2 was so tall his knees hit his chin in his buggy at 21 months. I became inured to the comments.

Mind you, when he went to school the reception and nursery children shared a playground, and in the first week there were a couple of misunderstandings about which class he belonged to, to his indignation.

[Roonerspism]

We need a "like" button on MN ????