To think someone should flea treat the bloody dog?!?

[MoreCakePlz]

DH got a dog when he lived with his parents before we got together. When he moved out, first with friends, then with me, the fog stayed at his parents but he diligently continued to go back there once a day to walk it. Fast forward 8 years and this ridiculous arrangement still continues.

Now to the AIBU bit...

when FiL and MiL go away the dog often stays with us. However twice in the last couple of years he's had fleas so bad they've stayed in the Capet after he's gone and I've had to pay for an exterminator to get rid of them. On another occasion I bought flea treatment and treated him myself because I couldn't bear to see him scratching.

MiL came over to our new house yesterday and bought the dog who scratched a lot while he was here. Now I have bites on my feet and I'm worried the house has fleas again!

MiL struggles to treat him because he's a big dog with a thick coat and she's frail, FiL isn't really interested at all in the dog and DH sees his responsibilities as ending firmly with the walks.

AIBU to think that for the sake of the dog and my sanity , one of them should bloody step up and get him regularly treated???

[EponasWildDaughter]

It sounds as though it's MIL and FIL who take the dog to the vets. Maybe you could somehow organise for your DH to take the dog to the vet next time OP. You could go along as well and at some point announce that the dog has fleas most of the time due to the shared care set up.

The vet will hopefully then talk about how unpleasant and unhealthy (and cruel) it is for the poor dog to have these parasites biting him all the time. His skin will be suffering from the scratching and his coat will not be in anywhere near the best condition it could be.

Perhaps a bit of a stern word from the vet might shame tip him into making the best decision for the poor dog. ie: coming to live with you and be cared for properly. MIL 'missing' the dog is not a good enough reason to leave him being neglected. And leaving him with fleas all the time is neglect.

[KinkyAfro]

Well if none of you are willing to ensure this dog's need are being met then the dog needs to be placed somewhere it will be better cared for. I can't begin to imagine how uncomfortable that poor dog must be, if I knew of a dog that wasn't being treated well I would be reporting the owners.

If MIL wants to keep the dog then your DH or you need to go round and ensure the dog and the house are de-flead regularly.

It is just cruel and unnecessary to watch this happen and do nothing

[GotToFTFO]

If the dogs riddled with fleas all the time eventually he/she will get I'll.
Fleas are hard to get rid off when they over run a home and I've seen it take years before they all disappeared long after the pets had died.

Poor dog!

[SmillasSenseOfSnow]

Nothing short of thoroughly (and I mean thoroughly) blasting both houses and regularly treating the dog will solve this problem for any of you.

[lardyscouse]

Tablets, work within 15 minutes. When dog arrives give tablet and take out for walk. Bring back 30 minutes later. No fleas.

[MoreCakePlz]

The dog does get treated, just when I've made a fuss not regularly. It doesn't help that his fleas seem to be resistant to off the shelf stuff - the only stuff that really works is from the vets.

I can see where people are coming from talking about rehoming but that seems a bit strong. In other respects the dog is well cared for and loved.

My frustrations are that neither my DH not his parents will take full responsibility for the dog so this (very important) task has fallen through the cracks.

If the dog was ours then I'd happily get stuck in and be responsible for treating him (as I have done while he's been staying with us on the past) but I've no desire to muscle in on what is an already complicated situation.

[MoreCakePlz]

I want him to come and live with us, or become wholly MiL and FiLs so boundaries can be set and responsibilities fully taken care of

[SmillasSenseOfSnow]

The dog does get treated, just when I've made a fuss not regularly. It doesn't help that his fleas seem to be resistant to off the shelf stuff - the only stuff that really works is from the vets.

There is no point in treating the dog when it is going back to a flea-ridden hole every day. If you can see fleas on you when you visit somewhere, it is absolutely crawling with them.

[SugarOnTop]

I can see where people are coming from talking about rehoming but that seems a bit strong.....In other respects the dog is well cared for and loved

neither my DH not his parents will take full responsibility for the dog so this (very important) task has fallen through the cracks

obviously the dog is NOT well cared for or loved - because responsible owners would not ignore something as simple as fleas! your husband bought the dog -HE should be fully in charge of its welfare no matter where the dog lives. your pil are not fit to look after a large dog due to their age/health complications - plus they live in a flea infested house! how on earth is the dog meant to remain flea-free living in that infested pit?!

i would refuse to allow the dog into my home until either he and pil house was treated and flea free or the dog was handed over to you to look after. People like your husband and pil should not be allowed to keep animals they can't be arsed to take full responsibility for - so lazy and selfish!

[bimandbam]

Why don't you take the dog to the vets when they are next on holiday and treat the house at the same time? Do they still sell flea bombs? You set them off in the hpuse and it does its stuff. Get proper stuff from the vets and treat the dog and maybe your own house at the same time. That should break the cycle.

Fleas cause anemia and can eventually be fatal. It's not fair that the dog suffers to save peoples feelings.

[lilacblossomtime]

OP I know how difficult it I when something is not quite your responsibility and you feel bad about it. It think you have to set that aside as it really is now your responsibility to ensure this poor dog is properly looked after. As you are the only person who seems to recognise this is a real health problem for the dog. Even though he is not your dog you still have a moral duty to make someone look after him. However what I would do first is go directly to your pil and offer to help take him to the vet flea clinic and if they still refuse say you absolutely insist on taking him to the vet as it is cruel not to.

[girlywhirly]

Perhaps telling the PIL that every person who comes into their home risks carrying fleas out on their clothing to their own homes, and those of others. People will not want to come. If the dog goes in cars, there will be fleas and eggs in there too.

A heavy flea and worm load will definitely impact on the health of the dog. Get some information off the internet and print it out for DH and his parents to read, perhaps they will then see that it is an important issue. Get some information from the vet about treatments and costs.

As I said in my readier post, fleas and worms will only be eradicated by using stuff from the vets. The dogs medication needs to be given exactly as the instructions describe, so if it is once every month it needs to be done every month without fail, no breaks because it's run out or can't afford it and only doing every two months to save money. Once doses are missed it weakens the protection of the animal and that's why they can then start to support fleas again.

Please work on DH, and when he is onside, discuss it with the PILS. It could only mean a very short time every month administering the medication which you and DH could do, and come to an arrangement with the PILS about costs. It could be as little as £10 a month.