To demand answers from OH?

[Spicysugars]

Okay, so recently (last month or so), my OH of 1 year isn't ejaculating anymore when we have sex, which I find really hard because 1. It makes me feel satisfied when he does and 2. He isn't really enjoying it as much anymore, I know he isn't, and I'm usually the one inisiating sex.

Here's my issue: He gets SUPER touchy and gets his back up when I try and mention it. I only ever mention it calmly and in a considerate way, yet he still gets so pissy!

I want to try and help/talk about this but he just won't, which is making this all 10 times work. I can't bring this up to him as I did again 5 minutes ago and he dismissed it and got angry.

I know he does masturbate a lot, but yesterday he went 4 days without masturbating and STILL couldn't cum when we done it. I feel like absolute shit.

In the past, if he had a
bit of trouble ejaculating, he'd just wank and then when he was ready to climax, I'd take him in my mouth etc (sorry for TMI)

Oh, and might I add, he's only ever ejaculated through vaginal penetration once, possibly twice, since we've been together.

If he speaks to you in such a horrid way why are you with him? He doesn't sound very nice. I can only presume you are young and have your whole life ahead of you. Shame to waste it on someone who when you want to talk tells you to fuck off?

Is he on anti depressants? That can sometimes cause this issue.

I agree butterfly
21 is very young and to be having sexual issues is not good at this age.
His porn and wanking is making you miserable.
He swears at you.
He gets SUPER touchy
He won't talk to you
He won't speak to a health professional
He gets angry
His being unable to cum inside you will become a real issue and porn use and more masturbation is not going to make things better
You need to really consider this.
If he was much older etc.... this might not be such an issue.
But it makes you feel crap and he won't talk and won't do anything about it.
You can put up and shut up or realise that this just isn't for you and end it before you waste too much time on this porn watching wanker!

Are you trying for a baby? You didn't mention it - hence I didn't address it. I think there are some basic issues you BOTH need to resolve before baby making time. Are you crying / scratchy face longing because you want a baby?
Does he / can he ejaculate when he watches porn?

But what if we were to try for a baby? How the bloody hell would that one work
OP isn't trying just thinking ahead. Very sensible too.

If you can get him to accept that porn has caused this then he should look at

www.reddit.com/r/NoFap/

This Reddit support thread is to help people like your OH..it says...

Whether your goal is casual participation in a monthly challenge as a test of self-control, or whether excessive masturbation or pornography has become a problem in your life and you want to quit for a longer period of time, you will find a supportive community and plenty of resources here.

Thank you hellsbellsmelons

Yes, I'm seriously going to invite him out for Dinner somewhere casual next week and have a deep talk about this, as I know he listens more and is more open to opinionswhen we're not at home.

I get really frustrated when he doesn't cum because it's not a case of every now and then, it's every bloody time we do it, and I'm just not satisfied.

Have you dropped any baby talk into recent conversation. That's the main reason a man wouldn't choose to come inside you in my opinion. Maybe he only trusts himself in the contraception process.

As for you not being satisfied? I'm not sure why not if he can make you orgasm. Lots of women don't orgasm during sex. There would he a lot of unhappy blokes about if they all took it as a personal insult.

Yes but male ejaculation is a far more common than female orgasm..

And no, I haven't. He brought baby talk up a little while ago himself, and is the one to mention it, not me.

Spicy, this sounds like a lot of angst and hard work when you are still early in a relationship and both young!

He wanks so much that he can't orgasm inside you.
When you try to talk to him he tells you to "fuck off"
you are having to go out to a public place so that he will talk rationally.

all of this bodes badly long term and is a huge amount of angst at the beginning of a relationship between 2 young people.

One piece of advice often given on here is "when someone tells you who they are - listen!" He seems to be telling you loud and clear!

Good luck

said ''if you don't like it, fuck off''

He is shouting loud and clear who he is here! I would heed his advice and he would not see me for dust. He completely disregards women in general and you in particular!

I have name changed so I don't out myself. I would never admit this in RL or on my usual username.

Me and DH were young when we got together. At 19 we had this issue in our relationship too. Now everything is fine (well actually much better than fine ).

Despite us being a very honest and open couple, DH would not discuss this. It was a nightmare for both of us, because we both felt like failures. I felt useless and inadequate for not making him cum. He was also feeling inadequate, useless and very angry with himself for not being able to.

After my breaking down in tears in front of him because I felt so useless and inadequate, he admitted he thought it was because he watched too much porn and wanked but couldn't bring himself to stop wanking and watching porn because when he'd tried stopping for a few days still hadn't been able to cum during sex.

It took a while for him to cut the porn and wanking but once he'd properly cut it out, that was it. He was fine, started cumming no problem. Then started getting stronger and stronger orgasms. A few years down the line he's admitted that porn had, at the time, ruined all forms of sexual pleasure - apparently even when he cummed when wanking it wasn't particularly pleasurable. Now with no porn and no wanking his orgasms in actual sex are "unbelievably strong". He hates what porn made him miss out on.

Thank you for that info name change, it's really appreciated. Thank you so much

It's so hurtful when he wants to cuddle up to me after sex (he loves cuddles) but all I want to do is scratch his face off

Fucking hell!! Because HE can't come, really? You want to scratch his face off?

Do him a favour, leave him. You sound like horrible.

Imagine if a man was saying this about his girlfriend/wife?

Please don't have a baby...what will you want to do to it if it won't breastfeed? Get yourself some counselling first & find out why you are reacting so flipping irrationally.

You say that you are being kind to him...this thread implies otherwise.

He is shouting loud and clear who he is here! I would heed his advice and he would not see me for dust. He completely disregards women in general and you in particular! So is op...(shouting loud & clear who she is) I think they are both far to immature to be together, let alone to have a bloody baby!.

I agree with some of what name says. If a woman said this about a man moaning about his gf not orgasming it would be a different story.

Some People are being very harsh here.

Of course it would be self esteem crushing if your husband never came when you had sex. It is NOT the same as a woman not orgasming.

The guy orgasming is sort of the "natural end" to a sec session. I can't imagine if enjoy sex with DP if I knew there was no end point!

You have my sympathies

A man who can't ejaculate whilst having sex with his partner, fair enough.

A man who is always watching porn and can ejaculate from madturbating to it but can't ejaculate from sex with his partner??

No, no, no, no.

I would find this extremely, extremely hurtful.

You should take his advice and fuck off.

Find a proper man who is willing to have a normal sexual relationship and leave your porny partner to it.

He doesn't need to see the gp , he just needs to stop watching porn.

yourbrainonporn.com/