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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To go silent in front of my 3 yr old

35 replies

LittleMissRayOfHope · 22/07/2015 08:09

Simply because I can not take anymore interrogation over every single thing I say!

If I talk on the phone she spends the entire time that I'm talking asking why I said that. 'Why did you say X mummy?' 'Mummy, why did you say X' until I have to pause my call and explain that she shouldn't talk to me when I'm on the phone.

If I speak to her brother she questions everything I say 'why did you say that mummy? Why did he do that mummy? Why did you tell him not to do that mummy?'

If I mutter under my breath, about anything in another room behind closed doors she is there questioning it.

And it's not just once. It's 3 or 4 times with each question. And even when I do give a full answer about why I said something she just asks again and again, until I say something like 'I've given you an answer, you don't have to keep asking the same question' then it just goes on endless questions about why she doesn't have to ask the same question....

It is exhausting and mind numbing. I now find myself (subconsciously until now) trying not to say things in front of her because I just can't cope with the endless endless interrogation of every single word I utter.
Even if it is too another adult. She just endlessly asks why I have said anything and everything!!

Even my mum and ExH have both noticed and commented to me that she doesn't do this with them. She doesn't do this at nursery. Just to me.

It's 8am and I've had an hour + 20 mins already if this. Confused

OP posts:
Millionprammiles · 22/07/2015 09:44

Reverse it - ask endless qus of your 3 yr old. It drives them nuts and is very funny.
After being repeatedly asked why she had been given a sticker at nursery my 3 yr old finally replied in exasperation "I just did!" before storming off in a huff. Bought me 10 mins peace.

Gruntfuttock · 22/07/2015 10:50

Honestly! It's like some of you have never even heard of duct tape!

Tsk.

LittleLionMansMummy · 22/07/2015 10:52

Feed her more. The only time ds is ever quiet is when he has a mouthful of food.

CigarsofthePharoahs · 22/07/2015 13:00

Ds1 is four and we get this
He's old enough to understand when he's being given a silly answer now, so when I asks what I am doing I say -
I'm riding an elephant
I'm wrestling a shark
I'm flying a jet plane etc
Definitely agree with turning it back on them, he can dish it out with his endles questions, but can't take it!

LittleMissRayOfHope · 22/07/2015 14:04

I do the silly answers. Dd loves that!!
I have tried reversing it and asked her endless questions and repeated the same one endlessly and she gets frustrated but it feels mean as she doesn't really understand what's doing!

OP posts:
YBR · 22/07/2015 14:11

I use "same answer as last time" a lot, along with "what do you think?"

ILiveOnABuildsite · 22/07/2015 14:33

Snap. I don't have the energy to say more, just reassured that I'm not the only one thus is happening to.

BertieBotts · 22/07/2015 14:50

DS is six and is still like this although mostly he gives me a running commentary of the contents of his brain now instead of just asking questions. I watched a video recently which explained about the different parts of executive functioning and at what age they all develop, and apparently three is the time where the ability to talk to figure stuff out comes in. But they don't develop the ability to do it silently in their heads until six or seven. So she's a thinker :) But you have a while of this. Sorry!

kungfupannda · 22/07/2015 14:56

I feel your pain.

Which way are we going? This way.
Why is it this way? Because this is the way to the shop/preschool/gran's house/*delete as appropriate
Why is this the way to gran's house? Because it is?
Why is it because it is? I can't answer that question. It doesn't make sense.
Why does it doesn't make sense? Because it's not a question that needs a why.
Why is it not a why?

Aaaaaaargh! [disappears in cloud of advanced metaphysical and theoretical linguistics]

EmeraldKitten · 22/07/2015 14:56

Ds2 is 5 and sometimes repeats questions.

The first time I say 'didn't I just give you an answer to that?' with a slightly puzzled air, and I'll answer once more if he persists. The second time I'll say the same but with [death stare] which usually works and he surprisingly manages to remember the answer.

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