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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To want my DS2 age 8 to play on his own sometimes

16 replies

Athyrium · 20/07/2015 14:19

He drives me mad! If he hasn't got either his older brother, the telly or the PC to hand then he just hangs around me saying he doesn't know what to do. He will just lean against a wall sighing or roll around on the floor doing nothing, repeating his mantra of 'I dont know what to do.' He will not be receptive to suggestions of what he could do either, he actually wants to be entertained. He has always been like this. I keep waiting for him to outgrow it. Arghhhh!

OP posts:
TwinkieTwinkle · 20/07/2015 14:23

I could have written this word for word. Love my ds but he can be a pain in the ass sometimes!

Itllbefiiiiiiiiine · 20/07/2015 14:26

My 8 yo does this.

I also used to do this.

And "I'm huuuuuungry."
No, you're bored.

Salmotrutta · 20/07/2015 14:27

Say to him:-
"Oh you want something to do? Well, here's the brush, mop and bucket because the kitchen floor needs a going over. Then the garden could do with a bit of weeding"

Works wonders... Wink

Rivercam · 20/07/2015 14:29

I think sometime children have to learn to entertain themselves, it's not always automatic. Also, sometimes it's good for kids to be bored.

maybe set time frames. Ie. Mummy has to the cleaning/cooking/mumsnet for an hour. I can play Lego/monopoly etc at 3.30pm when I finished my tasks'. If he moans, repeat your instructions, and carry on with your jobs.

AndyWarholsOrange · 20/07/2015 14:37

I feel your pain. DS2 has just turned 7 and it's not getting any better. He still wants my constant undivided attention in a way that the older two stopped before they turned 3. Luckily DD 12 does play with him a fair bit which saves my sanity. He'd been up less than ten minutes today before I heard 'Mummy, there's nothing to do' ...

Salmotrutta · 20/07/2015 14:41

Seriously folks - try the Housework Tactic.

It works - they melt away like snow off a wall.

PlaydoughGirl · 20/07/2015 14:54

Mine is the same. He has no interests whatsoever (aside from Minecraft). I've created a Bored Jar for these holidays - but he keeps pulling ideas out of it, and then putting them straight back in!

Athyrium · 20/07/2015 15:25

I have tried making him a timetable of suggested things to do, so lots of short and sweet activities, some with his brother, some alone. Doesn't work. They argue. He won't do a lone one. He sulks and goes back to leaning against a wall...

Will try the housework thing...suspect he would do said task in a half hearted sulky strop then return to his wall!

OP posts:
reni1 · 20/07/2015 15:31

"Here are your choices:

  1. find a non- screen related activity
  2. practise the 3x 4x and 7x tables
  3. practise spelling -igh and - y words
  4. tidy your bedroom"

He will immediately self- entertain, promise.

Salmotrutta · 20/07/2015 16:30

He might do the task in a half-hearted way but if you keep suggesting chores every time he says he has nothing to do he will soon cotton on OP.

My usual suggested chore was "Tidy your bedroom then and Hoover it!"

Magically they usually then found some previously forgotten book/toy/game... Hmm

Loric · 20/07/2015 17:11

Have you tried encouraging him to read more? My soon to be 8 year old has developed my love of reading so I brought him a kobo mini second hand. Only I can buy books for it so I know there's nothing dodgy on there. It's still a screen but at least it's not an xbox. Plus it saves on bookcase space (which is already full) you can start him off with something silly like captain underpants or the how to train a dragon books. Once he's hooked you'll have at least an hour at time of peace. Plus it widens their interests. Because of the dragon books my son went through a pirates phase. He's just finished Percy Jackson and the lightning thief so he's getting into Greek mythology. This can lead to other solitary games/activities.

bebanjo · 20/07/2015 17:21

The house work thing sounds good.
I would suggest he get a box together for the charity shop, if he has no use for all his stuff.

ilovesooty · 20/07/2015 17:38

What would happen if you removed or rationed screen /TV dependent on his engaging in a range of more varied self driven activities?

Happy36 · 20/07/2015 17:42

reni1 great ideas.

Yes, it is important for him to be able to amuse himself.

coffeeisnectar · 20/07/2015 17:43

Give him an empty cardboard box. Or tell him to build a den. Or suggest he bags up all his toys for the charity shop.

reni1 · 20/07/2015 18:54

Second the bagging up of his (obviously useless) toys and books for the charity shop, too.

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