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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think if you invite someone around your house...

8 replies

AutocorrectShit · 19/07/2015 14:31

It's rude to uninvite them about 4 mins later because they remembered they had to go out somewhere.

My friend has done this a few times to me. She makes plans to invite us around and then stops us from going around. I find it incredibly rude, yet she is always dropping in whenever she's passing or whenever she feels like it with all her kids.

I know she has other people go around. She's good friends with my cousin too and my cousin has been around loads of times with her children. I'm paranoid it's because of my kids but they're all good kids...her youngest son breaks our toys and we've had to hide precious things when he comes...my kids don't break things.

Maybe she's just using me?

OP posts:
TheRealAmyLee · 19/07/2015 14:35

If she drops in again tell her she can't come in as you are going out in 5 mins. Doesnt sound like someone I would want to be spending time with.

pasturesgreen · 19/07/2015 14:36

Yes, it is rude.

Just stop being available when she drops by, say you're busy or something.

CamelHump · 19/07/2015 14:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AutocorrectShit · 19/07/2015 14:37

I actually end up feeling embarrassed I said "yes" to her invitation. Maybe I'll just say I'm busy every time she invites us now.

OP posts:
CamelHump · 19/07/2015 14:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FenellaFellorick · 19/07/2015 15:28

Next time she invites you, say - before I say yes, will you just check you don't actually have somewhere else to be because you've invited me several times then told me you forgot another appointment. Just check first and when you're sure there isn't one, we can meet up.

Maybe she is just that scatty. I just can't see what she would have to gain from inviting you then uninviting you 4 minutes later. But if for some reason she is (maybe to feel like she's inviting you without actually having you in her home?) then this stops that.

And take control of her coming to you. Tell her to check first because it's not always convenient. Don't be afraid to not let them in.

She can only take the piss if you let her.

AutocorrectShit · 19/07/2015 17:55

I think she invites me just for the sake of saying it, so it doesn't seem like she's using me by coming here every 2 minutes. She seems to be able to invite my cousin over at short notice and have pizza parties or dinner in the evening. I think she doesn't want my kids there because they're younger? But then again, my children aren't trouble. They play happily without causing havock or fighting (unlike her son who fights and breaks everything in sight).

Well I won't be available anymore. Today was just incredibly rude. I really felt like she was counting on me saying "no" and then thought "shit she said yes" and then made her excuses.

OP posts:
bigbumtheory · 19/07/2015 19:39

Sounds like she likes to show how busy she is. Good on you OP, I wouldn't be available either.

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