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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to think that Graduating from Reception class isn't really a thing?

44 replies

Est2011 · 15/07/2015 11:39

So, my friend's child has just "Graduated" from their reception class. AIBU to think this is a bit silly? I'm all for celebrating success and enjoying our children's achievements, but I don't see what the achievement is in moving from reception class to year 1 - if I am missing something then please do point it out to me!

This also makes me think I'm not sure we are helping our children in having 'everyone's a winner' days instead of sports days. I don't see what's wrong with some healthy competition and learning about sportsmanship. I think it also helps children to learn that they don't have to be good at everything.

By celebrating non-achievements and by telling children they excel at everything they do, are we setting them up to deal with real life? Also, if we have Child A who is very good at sports but not academic, yet on sports day everyone wins regardless, are we diminishing Child A's strengths and achievements? Are we telling them they are not good at anything?

I think every child should be celebrated for their achievements and what they do best, be it sports, academia, or for having huge EQ!

OP posts:

MrsGentlyBenevolent · 15/07/2015 14:28

I think it's silly as well, seems a very recent thing? Then again, reception - year 2 were all in the same 'class' in my primary, same teacher. Obviously we did different levels of work, but all three years in one room. How would you 'graduate' in that situation I wonder? Seems rather unnecessary, I believe these sort of events should be for truly special occasions and achievements or they mean nothing.

reni1 · 15/07/2015 14:38

Oh, don't be so miserable. Its a bit of fun for the children, mortarboard picture and talking about how they went from holding the book upside down and worrying about managing to go to the loo to reading and navigating the whole school building. They enjoy it, parents don't take it too seriously.

No child achieves nothing in that year, so no "everybody is a winner" mentality needed.

ollieplimsoles · 15/07/2015 14:41

Load of rubbish imo, its a transition, not an achievement

FrenchJunebug · 15/07/2015 15:53

YABVU it's fun for the kids (think face painting). Also quite a moment in their life. For example mine has been there for 3 of is four years. So why not?!

FrenchJunebug · 15/07/2015 15:55

also it has nothing with 'graduating' just celebrating the time they have spend at nursery. They are only four ffs and you are seeing for too much into is.

LovelyFriend · 15/07/2015 15:57

YANBU - It's not like they would be 'held back' for not meeting all the Reception standards is it?

Thankfully our school is free of such fuckwittery.

SecretRed · 15/07/2015 16:24

It's just a bit of fun. I think it's quite cute.

FrenchJunebug · 16/07/2015 13:19

Kids who have been there for years are leaving for school and might not see each other ever again. How is the nursery wanted to mark 'fuckwittery?!

seriously.

LovelyFriend · 16/07/2015 13:24

The OP is talking about Reception, not nursery. Reception, where they have been one year, not years.

FrenchJunebug · 16/07/2015 14:13

my bad. Still think it's nice.

crazykat · 16/07/2015 14:33

I hate things like this. My nieces school have a graduation from nursery complete with cap and gown and professional photographer. Yes it's cute but it's way over the top.

Our school are having a prom for year 6 with many kids having limos. It's a two hour party for crying out loud.

I'm all for leavers assembly and a party for year 6 but why does it have to be a 'prom'? I'm mid 20s and we were only the second class to have a leavers party in year 11.

Graduation should be for highschool and university imo.

I also hate the everyone wins sports day. My dcs school did this last year and it was the kids complaining that nobody won. This year everyone got a certificate for participating and the winning class from each year got a rosette. It gives them something to aim for and teaches them they can't always win/come first which is a good thing imo, and I was the least sporty child in school.

kimistayingalive · 16/07/2015 15:01

Yeah i thought it odd when my son "graduated from Nursery" last week.
He had a laugh and I got to watch him dress up and wear a gown and hat and even got a fancy PIC out of it.
The downside is how long before proms start happening at a young age too. :-s

HamishBamish · 16/07/2015 15:16

DS2 had a 'graduation' ceremony at the end of nursery. It's just a bit of fun and a way of marking the children's move up into school. They made little paper mortar boards and went up one by one to receive a certificate from the Head. I don't think it's supposed to be taken seriously.

HamishBamish · 16/07/2015 15:17

I suppose if it's something your nursery/school does and you don't like it, you could always request your child doesn't take part?

somemothersdohavethem · 16/07/2015 15:20

YANBU learning to lose or try harder is an important of growing up. We can't all be great at everything and it's just a fact of life. If you learn it when you're young but also know your strengths then you become a stable adult who can brush off a wee failure here and there. I think it also allows you to celebrate the success of others.

Atenco · 16/07/2015 18:35

I do think wanting to make four and five year olds compete is a bit bizarre. I remember I was about six when it turned out that I was fourth in the class at the end of the year, I hadn't a clue what the adults were talking about and certainly didn't get my magnificent fourth place because I was comparing myself the other children. Children learn to lose in games and suchlike, but I think too much competition is bad for one. In the end there are always going to be people better than us and we should really, in the adult world compete with ourselves, trying to be better every day.

Original poster

Est2011 · 17/07/2015 09:11

I am referring particularly to reception where the kids have only been there a year. There's no denying they learn a lot, but they also learn a lot in the first year of their lives but we don't graduate them to be a 2 year old! What about the parents that can't get time off to attend all of these events? How will those children feel when they are made to think this is such an important thing but they don't have anyone there to cheer for them?

I know that for many this is just a bit of fun and in general the children won't remember this, however where do we draw the line? At what point do we stop?

I think every child should be celebrated for their own strengths and achievements, no idea how this would be done in an awards ceremony! I saw a letter one year from a head teacher to his pupils regarding the 11+, saying it's not important who passes and the board doesn't know that some of them have strengths outside of academia and they should all be proud of everything they have achieved ; this is the message I want to pass to my children.

OP posts:

Original poster

Est2011 · 17/07/2015 09:17

As for the competition part of sports day, I'm not saying it needs to be a mini Olympics! keep it fun but allow for winners. The importance of it being fun, its not a bad thing to not win and celebrate your friend's win are what I'm getting at. Maybe 4/5 is too young to understand it, but my 4yo was playing musical chairs at a party, when his 5yo friend burst into tears because he didn't get a seat, my son offered his. I said to my son he would be out of the game and he told me it's ok he wanted to keep his friend happy. Lots of praise for doing something nice for his friend.

OP posts:

PerspicaciaTick · 17/07/2015 09:21

Why do you feel the need to draw a line?

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