That parents should take young children to school

[Peachybanana]

There's a new family moved in a few doors down from me who have a son in primary 1 so he must be 4/5 yo. Every morning I see him walking to school on his own, the school is relatively close however there is a road to cross which does tend to be busy with school traffic in the mornings and home time.

The parents seem like a lovely couple, would it be wrong of me to
1.mention my concerns to them?

1. go out there myself and make sure he gets across the road safely

what would you do?

Jeez. . YANBU OP

That is way to young to go alone . Mine when still at same school started to go together in Year 4 and 6 respectively and that was a 5 minute walk away.. I am amazed the school allows him to leave alone (do they collect him?).

It is too young. Our local schools put out an alert last week because a man had tried to lead a 6 year old girl away from her mother whilst they walked home from school. These things are unusual but they do happen.

Our school won't release reception children unless a guardian is stood waiting for them and they have clear policies in place for older years, too.

DS' school is a five minute walk and no roads to cross, he won't be walking alone until I feel he's ready and he has friends to walk with, as it is a judgment call. No one age is definitively 'ready', but 4/5? Nooope.

God yea, there is that threat as well like Ostentatious pointed out. The little chap is in danger of quite a lot.

When my two began walking to and from school alone the Year 6 was fine but my youger son had to take a letter from me giving permission We had 2 roads they crossed, side roads.

My son's school wouldn't release child in infants until they'd seen an adult (and if they were going home with a friend you wrote it in a book so they knew who they were going home with).

The junior school didn't have any rules and a lot of the kids would go home with older siblings at secondary school (who might only be 12 or 13 themselves).

But I'm not sure about dropping off at infants - I think the kids went on their own into the classroom after the first few weeks so teachers would not be aware if they'd come with parents/adults or not.

This does seem rather strange. I know in Germany for example they are a lot more relaxed than we are about kids taking themselves to school but 4/5 is very young.

I would not talk to the parents but inorm school. pretty sure school will take it up which will probably have more impact than you approaching them.

how does he get home? our school would not release the child without somebody picking up.

I still walk ds3 to school and he has just finished P4. I am one of 3 parents in his year still to do this, the other two live much further away. I would have been happy for ds to walk to school and back for the last 6 months but he "doesn't feel ready yet" and I walk the dog at the same time anyway.

Every year there are a 3 or 4 P1's walking on their own. At this time of year they will be 5 or 6 years old. I'm not sure there's much you can do. They probably get changed, get their bike, scooter, football and head out again. When we were at the park at the weekend the oldest children there were 6. They took ds3's remote control car from him and wouldn't give it back until I threatened to set the dog on them intervened.

how does he get home? our school would not release the child without somebody picking up.

At our school they are 'released' when the bell goes and they are collected (or not) by parents at one of three gates. The school will have little idea of how they are getting home. Ds3 knows that if no one is there to collect him he should go to the after school club (in school grounds) and they will phone me. It's happened once in four years when his Dad 'fell asleep'!

You should inform the school although it's very surprising that they haven't noticed it that another parent hasn't said something.

I think you should mention it to the child's teacher or someone else at school. They can then give the parents appropriate advice without it coming from you.

Op please give the school a ring and let them know.

If you don't something awful could happen to that poor child!

I think it's disgusting behavior on any parents part to make/let a young child to walk to school on they're own.

We weren't allowed to walk to school alone until we were 11 and I'm 40 now and adults and children did see the world as a safer place back then.

I can never understand parents that take risks like that with they're children's lives and futures,not when nearly every single day were inundated with images of young children on the fronts of newspapers or on the News that have gone missing,been abducted,been seriously harmed or murdered.

In any of those cases where the parents weren't involved I bet they would beg all other parents to be more vigilant when it comes to they're children's safety outside of the home.

I honestly just can't say it's worth the risk!Something goes wrong for that poor child or any child that is made to get to and from school on they're own to young is a wrong that could have been so easily prevented!

I dunno. Is it a cultural thing? If so, and it's something that's the norm in that culture fair enough. Have a word with the parents, though, if it bothers you. At least you (and other parents) are in a position to look out out for him.

I know I walked to school with friends and alone at that age and it was a decent walk, but with little traffic. I think cultural norms have changed, that's all.

I'm not sure why how a child gets to and from school is the school's business though?(not being goady-genuinely curious..).

Absoloute the school would get involved because it's a child safety issue.

I've worked in schools for years and the way schools are run and the attitudes of schools have changed by a vast amount in the past 10 years.

Years ago the schools wouldn't have got involved unless what ever the issue was was happening at school.Now they realize that being more involved with the children's life's out of schools is a much better way of being able to see if any red Flags are being waved about the childs/childrens home lifes.

Thanks ohthe.

I think it's too young. The children at my DD's school aren't allowed to arrive or leave by themselves until year 6, the final year.

If he's in P1 they've been on holiday for a few weeks so I'm not sure where you're seeing him going.

This ^

Your welcome absoloute

Chwat we have the same at the primary schools our children have attended and the local schools I've worked at.

Year ago the local schools had a rule that they had to be 8 or over and have a note from a parent saying they could walk home.But after a few near misses and a few children being hurt by older teenagers and one child nearly being taken off they upped it to 11 years old.

I dunno. Is it a cultural thing? If so, and it's something that's the norm in that culture fair enough

No it's not fair enough.

Not if a 4 year old child is walking to school alone and crossing a road.

Way to young, I would speak to the school to address it with the parents. I get my judgy pants on with one parent who drops her reception child 100 yards down the road from school and let's her merrily skip to school on her own, often way too close to the road, I haven't said anything but have often had to guide the child away from the road and in to school safely. YANBU

I had an argument with DHs DD from his first marriage many years ago. She allowed her 4 year old DS, who was physically the size of a two and a half year old, to walk to school. The route was through an estate and along a main road. He was often stopped by people who thought he was an 'escaped' toddler!
She couldn't be bothered to take him.
The school insisted he was collected so she reluctantly did that, she claimed it was a waste of her time as he wouldn't walk with her and ran off!
It wasn't cultural...she was neglectful whole other thread

absolutelynotfabulous Someone's 'culture' shouldn't exempt them from taking proper care of their child.

Of course it's the schools business how children get to send from school, in this case it would be a safeguarding issue.

koala I think 4 is waaay too young too. The point I'm making is that sending a very young child to school alone could simply be part of what the family do and would not necessarily mean the child was somehow neglected. Odd, yes. Nowadays, anyway. It wasn't always the case that children were so heavily supervised. It was unheard of in my day to be escorted to school, for example, at 5.

Mind you, I AM ancient.

I watched a documentary once about (I think) Japanese children where the mother got in one carriage and her 4 year old daughter was put in another at the other end of the train. They were reunited at the end of the journey. The purpose of this was to build independence in the little girl.

So I wouldn't necessarily connect a little person on his own with neglect, that's all. Of course, there may be genuine cause for concern. But I also think that we are sometimes too quick to alert the "authorities" when some simple support for the family from within the community would be a more appropriate course of action. And that may simply mean, in this case, ensuring that the littlun gets across the road safely.

That's a good post absolutely and I agree 100% apart from the last bit where you said, "And that may simply mean, in this case, ensuring that the littlun gets across the road safely."

I think in that case it would simply mean telling the parents that it isn't how we do things within our culture, and that they need to take the child to and from school, or it becomes a child protection issue.

I would tell the school and not the parents. The parents may well resent your interference. The school will talk to them.