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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

I can't take dc out of school in term time but...

47 replies

Exactopposite · 12/07/2015 13:12

They have had the last two Fridays off.

They had a weeks trip which included an entire day at a theme park and a day shopping.

They've had two fun theme days.

Tomorrow they are spending an entire day again at a theme park again which means those left behind who can't afford like my dc will watch dvds all day.

I know iabu but Angry

OP posts:
DoctorDonnaNoble · 12/07/2015 15:57

We're still teaching and learning not just going on jollies!

PtolemysNeedle · 12/07/2015 16:05

Have the last two Fridays been inset days or something?

What do you mean by 'fun theme days'? Are you talking about extra curricular things that schools are required to provide occasionally?

What's your issue with a week long resedential trip including a day at a theme park?

I get that you must be feeling crap about it if your dc are missing out on a day trip tomorrow but that's a separate issue. It might be worth remembering that it is possible for children staying at school to still enjoy their day away from routine.

NickiFury · 12/07/2015 16:11

Last week arts week the whole week. This week sports day, school trip, theatre group coming in.

I love that dd gets to do this stuff. I am happy when I get the letter informing of these activities because I know she'll love them. I have no demands that my child should be nose to the grindstone every minute she's at school.

What I object to is being told that me her mother taking her out for a week of "enrichment activities" in another country at the only time I can afford to do it, is not acceptable, that it will irrevocably damage her education and future chances and is also illegal so I will be fined for it.

I refuse to adhere to that and will pay the fine knowing that I have to do that legally but all the time I will know that morally, I am in the right.

Teabagbeforemilk · 12/07/2015 16:14

Nicki that's where I am. Don't really mind the last few weeks being more relaxed, but object to the fact that I am told I can't make that decision.

Bunbaker · 12/07/2015 16:15

"I thought they couldn't leave kids out, whose parents can't afford trips."

They can at secondary school.

Teabagbeforemilk · 12/07/2015 16:17

Oh really bunbaker? Dd hasn't started yet. Is that applicable to all trips? I know at the secondary dd is going to (an academy) if you qualify for free school meals you also get a grant paid at the begining of each term. I wonder if that's to pay for stuff like this.

Bunbaker · 12/07/2015 16:22

The school get something called Pupil Premium funding which is additional funding to raise the attainment of disadvantaged pupils and close the gap between them and their peers. Children who receive free school meals are entitled to this, although the funding goes to the school rather than the pupil. There are strict rules about pupil premium and the school cannot add this to their overall budget to benefit other pupils. The school can only spend pupil premium funding on these children.

I doubt very much that this would be used to take them to theme parks though.

Teabagbeforemilk · 12/07/2015 16:28

That's the one. Our academy gives £300 to the parents each term. They must pass it (or part of it) to the parents. Haven't looked into it too much as we dont qualify for free school meals

ThoseAwfulCurtains · 12/07/2015 16:32

I sent a note in with DC3 who is in yr 9 to say we were taking a long weekend and understood that Monday and Friday would be recorded as unauthorised absence. Dc3 was told by his form teacher to take the note
back and get us to phone in to report as sickness or we'd be fined. What a sensible woman.

Heels99 · 12/07/2015 16:37

Pupil premium is paid to the school not the parents. School have to report on what they spend it on you can normally see it on school website our school goes into vast detail. They do pay for trips uniform and food for some kids. The money is supposed to lead to improved results and it is monitored. If you have never had free school meals your child is unlikel to be eligibly for the pupil premium unless you be military family

CaptainTripps · 12/07/2015 16:38

Please don't blame the teachers and schools. It's the government! And schools are under pressure as a consequence to keep to targets.

Bunbaker · 12/07/2015 16:45

DD's school isn't an academy so they don't give money to parents of less fortunate children. They spend it on the children in school.

Teabagbeforemilk · 12/07/2015 16:47

heels we got the forms from school asking if we earned a certain amount and advising us if we earned less we would get free school meals. It said this would also entitle us to pupil premium. On the schools website it says it is paid to parents at the beginning of each term.

As I said I didn't look into it too much as we don't qualify. However I do know it's paid to the parents. Maybe because it's an academy

Exactopposite · 12/07/2015 17:37

Yes Nickifury that is what I meant but wrote badly.

I have no issue with trips to theme parks, legoland, ice skating, beach, shopping trips etc

It's the fact if I rolled up to school and said I was taking dc out for the day to go to a theatre show, theme park, etc I had got cheap mid week tickets for or took advantage of a last minute show, beach, museum or trip to Bluewater they would tell me to sod off even though it's a DVD day.

OP posts:
Golfhotelromeofoxtrot · 12/07/2015 19:24

exact I guess a huge difference is that they do this as a collective group of their peers and they build friendships and learn important social skills. School doesn't need to be academically educational all the time.

NickiFury · 12/07/2015 20:37

"They do this as a collective group of their peers, they build friendships and learn social skills and learn important social skills"

Just as they do every single day that they spend in school with the same group. I'm sorry I just don't agree that school is the only and most important way to do this. Children socialise and build social skills every single day outside of school with people of all different ages and backgrounds. All you're saying is that they are learning to socialise in a specific way in a specific place with a specific peer group and while that has some limited value! it simply does not reflect real life, unless they join the forces!

I want someone just for once to tell me how a week on a beach, playing with local kids, exploring new environments, eating new food, sight seeing and spending relaxing time as a family holds less value than a week in school with the same old faces, in the same environment. I want to understand how that week in school holds more value for children in a family that cannot afford to go away unless during term time?

Golfhotelromeofoxtrot · 12/07/2015 21:02
  1. Time in class socialising is not the same as on a trip. It's so much more relaxed. It's a lovely time for children and they are worked so rigorously now they deserve the down time.
  1. From the OP I took it that we were comparing HER taking them to the theatre to the school. Spending time as a family is really important, but most children get that opportunity every weekend.
  1. I completely agree with term time holidays, I don't think they should result in parental fines IF the child otherwise has a good attendance record and the holidays don't occur in KS4/5 or exam periods.
BananaInPyjama · 14/07/2015 02:25

we have just come back from a trip to UK. People were asking why our Year 3 daughter was not in school.

EVERYWHERE we went- theme park, historical sites, fun places, London, beach....there were coach loads of school kids. My daughter laughed as she was questioned for being out of school, yet these multitudes of kids were on school arranged trips. Basically June and July seem to be jollies for those not taking exams.
(term time absences are OK here)

Isetan · 14/07/2015 04:51

Hanging out with my Mum and siblings at the seaside or going with my mates from school to the seaside, hmmm it's a toughie but hell yeah, I'd want to go with my class. Inset days are usually on a Monday or Friday at DD's school so long weekends away are possible but DD has a few extra curricular activities during the week so I like to keep weekends lazy.

I think it's great that at the end of the school year DD can let her hair down and it's not all tests and work. She had an afternoon a week ago when it was 30 degrees, where they fired water pistols at each other and played with water, she absolutely loved it.

You mention art week and sports day in your list of, i'm guessing, things you deem unnecessary and Bluewater in your list of alternate things you could be doing, which says it all really.

The end of term stuff isn't about you, it's about the kids who actually go to school, I wish I had done half the things DD does at the end of term.

All this bitching about term time holidays is really quite tiresome, as there are enough non term time weeks and weekends to do all the things on the OP's list.

namechange4this123 · 14/07/2015 08:45

yanbu

dcs (secondary) have reported that they are watching films in lessons all week. Not even any proper enrichment activities, just films (and sports day, but dcs arent sporty and arent fussed)

i could have saved so much by booking holiday this week.

tiggytape · 14/07/2015 08:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

YeOldTrout · 18/07/2015 17:06

The rules about term time holidays are rubbish.

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