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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

My cats and cat poo in neighbours' gardens

555 replies

Blahdeblah1 · 12/07/2015 08:52

I moved into my house a year ago and have three cats. My neighbours are all quite elderly and have lived there for decades, they are all keen gardeners and very proud of their gardens.

Several months ago my next door neighbour started complaining to me about my cats pooing on his drive, so every time I go round and clear it up. Although to be honest I'm not convinced that the poo is from my cats.

Anyway, I'm now having complaints about cat poo from people who live way down the street, that my cats are pooing in their garden, although they admitted they hadn't actually seen the cat that did it. I live on a large suburban housing estate where there are loads of cats.

AIBU for thinking that cats are cats and I shouldn't be expected to be picking up any cat poo really, and to tell my neighbours to deal with it themselves and stop complaining to me? I can't control where my cats poo, they are not dogs.

OP posts:

PosterEh · 14/07/2015 15:32

In real life that is what I've done lurked. I'd rather have a good relationship with my neighbour than complain to her about picking up her cats poo. I made a passing comment about it and she clearly didn't want to accept responsibility (I apologised that I would be shooing her cats from our garden because of the poo and she said it must be foxes). I haven't mentioned it since.

But I do get upset on these threads when people say it must be foxes, or cat poo isn't that bad, or cats bury their poo, or it's fine and they'd be happy to pick up someone else's cat shit everyday so I should just get over it. Rather than acknowledging that it must be pretty shit to have the neighbourhood cat toilet and that it spoils their enjoyment of their garden to constantly have to be on the look out for it.

PosterEh · 14/07/2015 15:36

Evans you just said a few posts up that your veg patch was cat-poo free, didn't you?

Lurkedforever1 · 14/07/2015 15:39

Funny thing is poster in real life if it was my cats shitting in your garden I'd have asked you to tell me (like I do now) if they did, so you wouldn't be trying to politely bring it up, and volunteered to come round and clean it up 2x a day same as I do with the corner of my garden they mostly use ( litter tray done minute it happens)

EvansOvalPiesYumYum · 14/07/2015 15:40

I did, you're right. I've not had to pick up any, but I'm sure cats do poo in it (judging by other comments), maybe I just haven't noticed. Point being, whether or not cats poo in it, we are still here.

PosterEh · 14/07/2015 15:45

lurked

I've been thinking about trying to encourage them to just poo in one particular area in the far part of the garden after one of them pooed there the other day. We mostly play close to the house. Maybe I'll get dh to leave a patch next time he mows the grass as they seem to poo more when the grass is longer. They seem to go through phases of pooing in a certain spot so maybe this might work.

It's only a rental and we don't expect to live here long so it's more of a temporary frustration. I can see why people get worked up about it though. It's different to when you find the odd poo gardening - it's every time we go out to play, right there on the lawn. I'll give less of a shit in Winter when I don't want to use the garden.

EvansOvalPiesYumYum · 14/07/2015 15:47

Have just run out to take a quick look. We have lettuces, strawberries, raspberries, courgettes, beans (probably not affected anyway, as they grow upwards ^) carrots, beetroot, cucumber, cavalo nero, swiss chard, spinach and something else that DP has planted that I can't quite identify. But no cat poo, so perhaps I was being presumptuous in assuming a cat might have got in amongst it all. It is a free-for-all. Slugs aplenty.

PosterEh · 14/07/2015 15:47

Or maybe they don't Evans because you have a cat...

EvansOvalPiesYumYum · 14/07/2015 15:49

No Poster it makes no difference because we have a cat - the others come in anyway

Lurkedforever1 · 14/07/2015 15:51

Or poster a patch/ litter tray filled with sand/soil/ cat litter in a far corner, easier to remove than hidden in long grass

PosterEh · 14/07/2015 16:03

I'm not sure I want to remove it though. If it's far enough away we can just avoid that part of the garden.

A bit of googling has just revealed that it might well be cat urine causing the weird dry, dead patches on the grass. The images I've found on Google look just like it. I might try one of those automatic sprayers.

Lurkedforever1 · 14/07/2015 16:43

Thats kind of what I meant, just leave it in a place of your choosing. Sprinklers might work but try a cheap version first, one of mine loves water, others have been indifferent. Try telling your neighbour you're going to get a sprinkler so you apologise in advance if her cats get soaked and see if it spurs her into action.

nigelslaterfan · 14/07/2015 16:43

There is a fairly lame article from the Pet Owners Association here
which states very clearly it's illegal to harm a cat which is shiteing in your garden.

LashesandLipstick · 14/07/2015 16:49

Nigel all your posts on here are just a thinly veiled "I dislike cats" rant!

EvansOvalPiesYumYum · 14/07/2015 16:53

I've just skimmed through that article, Nigel - what makes you think it is 'lame'? Much of it seems fairly good advice to me, meeting some opposing posters on here halfway . . . ?

Water guns = good idea
Cruelty = not a good idea

Do you think it's lame because you are not permitted to harm a cat?

LashesandLipstick · 14/07/2015 16:57

I don't see why it's lame either it has good suggestions for humanely getting them to not shit on your lawn

nigelslaterfan · 14/07/2015 17:00

No it's lame because I genuinely think having a domestic cat in a built up area is untenable. it's not acceptable to have a pet that craps on your neighbour's property. And you that opine, well i have a cat and there's no poo in my garden are like my sister, her cat keeps all the other cats out. She does get the odd fox poo but there's nowt any of us can do about foxes.

So I love cats, I grew up with them, I had my own when I was a teenager, I cleared out the litter tray. They are wonderful. But when I realised what it meant for all the non cat owners and my garden became a cat toilet. one or two turds a day? I just thought, this doesn't work ethically.

That cat documentary demonstrated that you free range cat owners don't know where they are most of the time unless asleep in your house. So you have no idea where they are crapping. Only the in-house cat owner is truly responsible, if slightly mean to the cats (imho).

I love cats, but I couldn't have a pet which craps in an other person's garden full stop. it's just indefensible. Would you let your child crap next door? Your dog? would you piss in your neighbour's garden? No, that would be abominable. So why is this ok? It isn't ok. We all know it. I love cats, but my garden ain't your cat's toilet. Don't have a cat.

LashesandLipstick · 14/07/2015 17:05

Why is it indefensible? It's a crap, not a WMD, Jesus get some perspective.

nigelslaterfan · 14/07/2015 17:05

Oh btw, we tried all the anti cat stuff when we were in London, the noise machine, the anti cat plants, the super soakers, I'd love to know what kind of fence might work!

They work inconsistently, like til the batteries run out, until you're not sitting there ready to super soak! 2 am? 11 am? with night vision glasses, come on!

You know what works? Moving somewhere with fewer cats. Although recently a local great hog of a cat has started shitting in our garden. God give me patience.

lunar1 · 14/07/2015 17:06

I've had to give up my vegetable garden because so many neighbours have so many bloody cats. The things are a bloody menace and should be indoors.

nigelslaterfan · 14/07/2015 17:07

But it isn't ok with me. It is ok for you because most of you have less crap in your garden because you have a cat.

I am telling you, I have plenty of perspective, I just think your pet choice is really selfish, that's it. I have no problem with perspective. Your pet's shit in my garden = unacceptable. There is nothing else to say.

LashesandLipstick · 14/07/2015 17:09

And I think you're ridiculous. What about other animals, do you get so angry about wildlife pooing in your garden?

nigelslaterfan · 14/07/2015 17:11

No because wild animals don't have owners

nigelslaterfan · 14/07/2015 17:14

All you have to do is say this

"I am sorry that my self-indulgent pet needs cause my neighbours to regularly have to clear up my pet's defecation which causes stress and upset to them. I have no justification for this accept that i want a cat and I don't care that you suffer for it. Your feelings and property don't matter to me. I don't care about your distress. My needs are paramount."

If you could say that, I would at least respect your honesty!

LashesandLipstick · 14/07/2015 17:15

So it's not the poo you have a problem with is it. It's you getting on your high horse about what you think people SHOULD do. If it was the poo you'd have a problem with poo in heberal

nigelslaterfan · 14/07/2015 17:16

I'm waiting to hear one of you just be honest.

It's easy just tell the truth

"I don't care that my pet craps up your garden"

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