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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that mother & baby spaces are for people with babies & small children?!

354 replies

cranberryx · 08/07/2015 19:12

Parked up at asda before work and low and behold what do I see?

3 vans, an elderly gentleman and a young couple all park up and get out of their vehicles and stroll into asda. Not one car seat, not one small child in sight!

I know it wasn't a busy time (8am) but still, I would be so peed off if I parked up with my little one and couldn't find a space with space to get a car seat out of etc!

Next time I might have a word! Or am I just being a grump!

OP posts:
DJThreeDog · 09/07/2015 12:11

Love all the sneery comments about being lazy or toddlers not melting in the rain.

I assume you just gloss over those comments (like mine) that actually it can be dangerous trying to get a baby out of a car when it is super busy and you have no space to either side?

I once had to manoeuvre both kids into the car via the boot because two inconsiderate pricks had boxed me in. Then I had to crawl
in too!

But no, wanting a bit more space is because I'm precious about my kids getting wet Hmm

daisywellies · 09/07/2015 12:14

DJ Why do these spaces have to be beside the door?

itsmine · 09/07/2015 12:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Sirzy · 09/07/2015 12:45

What I really don't get is how some people who need these spaces cope in the vast majority of car parks which don't have them!

Basically if a space is free and you need it (for child, disability whatever) then use it, if not park in a space that's available

Bodgebodge · 09/07/2015 12:46

It would annoy me, but there are far worse things in life.

starkers1 · 09/07/2015 12:49

YANBU. These spaces are for parents with young kids needing space to manoeuvre in and out of the car. For these lazy slobs to take it- is appalling. To all those who comment "oooh well they weren't around in my day" well you are just bitter about that. As well as the fact you don't understand that so many buggies these days i.e. bugaboos are 2 part contraptions that can't easily just collapsed and gently slide into car with door barely open. My car door needs to be fully open with space next to it for me to get DC out of it and buggy into car. Hence why I need these spaces/ wider space. I've left notes on windows where selfish idiots not needing these spaces stroll into shop with no DC. I'm not the loony- they are for being so clueless, lazy and selfish.

As for comments saying we are "entitled" I think you have this wrong. This sense of entitlement to park wherever they like as if making some kind of twisted point, is in the selfish people taking spaces not intended or marked for them, not us.

FraggleHair · 09/07/2015 12:56

To all those who comment "oooh well they weren't around in my day" well you are just bitter about that.

Oh yes, I bet they lie awake at night shaking their fist at the ceiling and gnashing their teeth at the injustice of it all.

Dawndonnaagain · 09/07/2015 12:57

I've left notes on windows where selfish idiots not needing these spaces stroll into shop with no DC.
How do you know it's not me with my dds? Or do you leave notes for BB users too?

FanFuckingTastic · 09/07/2015 13:00

I'm disabled and when I forget my blue badge, I'll use one. I don't drive, so I am usually with my mum, hence forgetting. Otherwise she has to let me out before parking and let me in after moving out the space.

Icimoi · 09/07/2015 13:06

Have little ones is hard, and you can do.with little helping hands like this. It's not vital, but a nice thing and it doesn't really hurt able bodied childless people to park further away.

But why does it hurt able-bodied parents to park further away? The chances are that parents of young children are a great deal more able-bodied than many others who don't happen to fit the definition of disability.

daisywellies · 09/07/2015 13:09

Your (rather ranty) post still doesn't explain why they have to be beside the door starkers. Or is it just 'bitter' of me to wish that those spaces could be freed up so that elderly people like my 80 year old mum could also avail of a space near the shop.

Or are you one of those people who just thinks that any elderly person who's a bit frail or shaky on their feet should just 'get a blue badge'?

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 09/07/2015 13:09

People are lazy bastards in the main.

we often have to park a block away to go to the beach with DD, despite having a blue badge, as people going to the gym just have to park in the disabled spaces and cant walk along from next block. This is just more of the same. Not the worst crime ever, but why not just show some consideration for others?

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 09/07/2015 13:10

I mean this parking in P & C spaces is not worst crime ever.

parking in the disabled spaces to go to the gym, when able bodied, is really shitty and lazy.

bigbuttons · 09/07/2015 13:12

Christ, there are some bloody entitled and bleating parents on here. You chose to have your children so you must deal with everything that entails. The disabled and frail elderly don't have a choice.

queentroutoftroutss · 09/07/2015 13:12

I think some people are wayy to over Invested in this issue. Leaving notes on window screens, who exactly do you think you are? Just because you have a child it doesn't mean that the world has to adapt around you. It is helpful but it is not an entitlement, if there is one available then great and if not then just move on fgs.

daisywellies · 09/07/2015 13:14

People are lazy bastards in the main.

Nothing like making sweeping statements.

daisywellies · 09/07/2015 13:16

I agree queen. Anyone who goes around leaving notes on people's windows or encouraging their 11 year old to ask people where their baby is seriously needs to find something a bit more important to focus on.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 09/07/2015 13:16

'If I can get three children out of my fanjo, I can get them out of my car in a normal parking space.'

Definitely a witty come-back, Elpheba - although, in fairness, when I squeezed three children out of my fanjo, I was given plenty of pain relief, tea and toast, and a nice rest in bed afterwards - that never happens after someone has had to prise their child out of a barely open car door. Maybe if it did, people would be less testy about P&C spaces.

Teeste - early in the thread you mentioned cars in P&C spaces with no car seat in them - these could be people whose baby is tiny, and who have taken the baby into the store in the car seat, couldn't it?

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 09/07/2015 13:24

daisywellies I am speaking from my experience re parking.

Dunkyourcustardcream · 09/07/2015 13:26

YANBU .... In fact I will happily join forces with you, we can build a vigilante gang against these tyrants and hang around the p&c spaces with baseball bats. Or we could go more passive aggressive and walk in front of them round the supermarket with our trolleys... really slowly.

I've got loads more ideas.....

daisywellies · 09/07/2015 13:28

But how can 'your experience' tell you why others park in P&C spaces without children? It could be because there were no other spaces available when they were looking, or because they've an elderly person in the car with them, or it's lashing rain and they've no coat or umbrella, or they're recovering from an illness or surgery and feeling a bit fragile.

I'm sure sometimes it's laziness, but how can you say that 'people are lazy bastards in the main' when you don't actually know why they've used a P&C space.

I'm not talking about bb spaces as there is no circumstance where they should be used by anyone other than a bb holder or someone driving them.

popcornpaws · 09/07/2015 13:28

Its a marketing ploy, the supermarkets don't actually give a shit who parks in them because its not a legal right!
I work in customer services in a huge supermarket and if you complain i can tell you, your wasting your time! No one cares!
As others have said, they didn't have them years ago yet we all managed no problem at all,

daisywellies · 09/07/2015 13:32

I know someone who works for a large supermarket chain and they also told me that the supermarket couldn't care less who parks in these spaces, they're just there for the optics as a bit of PR.
Any parent charging in foaming at the mouth about someone parking in them 'illegally' would be considered an idiot.

ghostyslovesheep · 09/07/2015 13:35

SDTG maybe they should offer gas and air to people parking in normal spaces - bet the P+C ones would be empty then

Can I just add - while wearing my flame proof suit - I hate seeing babies in car seats out of the car - they are hard plastic seats - take them out and lie them flat in a nice comfy pram or in a baby seat on a trolly - stop squishing them up for hours in car seats

starkers1 · 09/07/2015 13:37

daisywellies I don’t care how far away from the shops they are, I'm perfectly able to walk with buggy an extra few mins and would so do happily. I am very grateful for the space/access to car doors they provide, inafct they should be moved further away which would hopefully stop the purely lazy (not the elderly/disabled before you jump on me) people using them to jump quickly into shops without needing them as well as those of you fuming at us mums who do use them and expect to use them when available.

Obviously if someone disabled/frail or/and elderly can’t find a space and there only option is to use these- of course that is ok and understandable. But if someone not in the above categories nabs these just because they are “there”- that is completely and utterly selfish- how can you argue that its not?