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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To be furious at the way our cleaner has been treated?

45 replies

listsandbudgets · 08/07/2015 08:39

Our cleaner has been with us just over a year and shes brilliant. She actually has a waiting list for people who want her so what's happened can be repaired but I'm so angry for her.

She's been on the waiting list for an operation for ages and a few days ago was suddenly told that there had been a cancellation so her operation is now today and she'd need 4 weeks of after that to recover.

She phoned to tell me and obviously I'm not pleased but I accept she'll be back eventually and as its nearly the summer holidays we'll be away for part of the time anyway.She's also been in pain so its best she gets this done.

I phoned her last night to wish her good luck with the operation and to talk about giving her some sick pay to tide her over and she burst into tears and said 2 of her clients had sacked her over the phone as soon as she'd told them what was happening. One was apparently really vicious and told her if she wasn't there next week there wouldn't be a job waiting for her as there were plenty willing to work harder for less. (she charges £10 an hour and brings all her own cleaning equipment)

Our cleaner is hard working, honest a good cleaner and normally bar family emergency reliable about time (then she phones) and the single mum of 2 children one who has ADHD. She was quite open about all of this when I interviewed her and also told me she was on the waiting list for the operation so may need some time off at some point.

AIBU to want 5 minutes alone in a room with the client who treated her like sh**t so I can tell him exactly what I think of him? She's a human being not a robot.

OP posts:

Skiptonlass · 08/07/2015 09:39

Bloody hell. Some people are just beyond belief.

Ten quid an hour is nothing for someone trustworthy - if you're letting someone into your home then you being able to trust them is priceless. I'd continue to pay her something token the weeks she was off and send her some flowers.

Incidentally, I looked into getting someone in to clean our place here in Sweden. The local cleaning service cost two hundred quid a month (for two visits of a few hours each.) Labour costs are much higher here, as frankly they should be.

If you really need someone into clean why don't you ask her if she knows anyone trustworthy who could do a couple of visits while she's out?

dixiechick1975 · 08/07/2015 09:42

Hopefully it will bite them on the bum and when they get a poor cleaner they will realise what they are missing. Had a few cleaners and the best are definitely worth keeping. does make me think of the jury thread and self employed people from yesterday - no doubt those 2 clients would have got rid of her over that too.

Smoorikins · 08/07/2015 09:45

Sounds like she is well rid.

Why would she wasn't too work for people that treat others like that anyway,?

Original poster

listsandbudgets · 08/07/2015 09:50

skiptonlass making mental note NEVER to move to Sweden. I don't think I'd last a week before being mired in debt and I'd have to do all my own cleaning

Hopefully we won't be drowning in filth. I shall do my best. I'm dyspraxic so organisation, co-ordination and so on don't come well to me though I do try. It may sound like lazy excuses but hoovering and dusting with little co-ordination is hard. I will miss her but look forward to her return :)

OP posts:

CardinalRed · 08/07/2015 09:52

That is so awful.
My DM had a lady coming to clean all my life - they weren't just cleaners, they became friends. When I got married, I invited the lady to my wedding.
DM now in a home - her last cleaning lady visits her regularly.

Wishing your cleaning lady a good recovery.

You have what is known as "a treasure" - a reliable, conscienscious person. What a pity her other clients are too ignorant to realise this.

RiverTam · 08/07/2015 09:54

Can I just point out that the OP's own initial reaction to being told about her cleaners operation was to be 'not pleased'. Those other people have been shit but I don't think you're exactly a charmer either!

Original poster

listsandbudgets · 08/07/2015 10:00

Rivertam I didn't tell her I wasn't pleased it was just a fleeting panic at my arrangements having to be changed for a month. I doubt anyone would be pleased at having to rearrange something that was running smoothly and on fairly little notice at that.

Your right though I am certainly not a charmer!

OP posts:

flushingfreda · 08/07/2015 10:10

I'm a self-employed cleaner although I work for just one family if I was ever treated badly or spoken down to they would get told to stick it. Iam good at my job and can provide excellent references so move on to the next one cleaning jobs are ten a penny where I live.

And I also think you should treat your cleaner with respect and decency we are human and not beneath you.

notinagreatplace · 08/07/2015 10:19

My cleaner's mother died last year and she had to go back to her home country for a few weeks. I think we are the only clients who didn't just sack her and move to someone else. It does horrify me a bit.

We did a combination of doing our own cleaning and getting an agency cleaner in for a one off. Setting aside the fact that sacking someone who is grieving for their mother seems like a horrible thing to do, I also really value that she is so trustworthy and good at her job, so have no interest in looking for someone else.

LovelyFriend · 08/07/2015 10:25

YANBU those people have been badly behaved. It's their loss though and as you say the cleaner has a waiting list so she will be fine.

I did at your first reaction to be "obviously not pleased" that your cherished cleaner was finally getting a major op she needed, and that you were aware she would be needing.

On this basis, perhaps some of your fury is a little misplaced and projected from your own inconvenience and importance in the scheme of things.

MrsKoala · 08/07/2015 10:47

I don't think anyone is going to come on here and say those people behaved well. It is horrible to speak to people like that and be expectant and rude. But the being replaced part is all part of the nature of self employment. If you provide a service to someone and cannot do so when they want you to it is completely normal for them to find an alternative.

I come from a family of self employed people. Getting no holiday and sick pay is part of that (which is why the charges incorporate that) and someone finding someone else when you can't do the date/time they want is also par for the course.

My dad is an electrician and has worked reliably for years for someone, he called dad while he was visiting me and asked him to go to a job that day (non urgent) and dad said he could do tomorrow but wasn't in London atm. They guy said he'd find someone else and dad has never heard from him since. But he is stoic about it. It happens so often and if you got upset self employment isn't for you.

It's swings and roundabouts, a lot of SE people choose this specifically because they like the flexibility, being able to choose their hours and to pick and choose jobs.

SuffolkNWhat · 08/07/2015 10:51

It's cleaning. Do it yourself for a few weeks it won't kill you. They've behaved shockingly to a dedicated employee.

paxtecum · 08/07/2015 10:55

It's a servant attitude.
I bet he wouldn't talk to a Doctor or Professor like that.

diddl · 08/07/2015 10:59

That sounds awful.

Hope she gets on OK with her op, recovery & replacing those who have dismissed her.

And of course depending on how many hours the cleaner does per week, it's surely just an inconvnience to have to fit in a couple of hours cleaning that you don't usually do.

It's not as if they have to suddenly do hard labour for 12hrs a day for 4wks!

Some people just don't think it through.

MrsKoala · 08/07/2015 11:03

She is not an employee Suffolk. She is a self employed professional service provider. It is not the same thing.

I would also say people like that talk to everyone they pay like that. They see it as their right as they are paying.

BettyCatKitten · 08/07/2015 11:55

Outrageous. Some people are cunts!

CommanderShepard · 08/07/2015 11:56

You're a good sort, OP.

Where are you? I'll take her on after her op if you're anywhere near me! (though for £10ph I doubt it )

Katedotness1963 · 08/07/2015 12:22

What a disgusting way to treat anyone. I would have though that having a hardworking cleaner that you can trust to do their job well, on time and not be sticky fingered would be worth doing your own cleaning for a few weeks while they recover from surgery.

She should tell the people who don't like it to eff off and when she's ready to go back to work, move onto the waiting list.

PtolemysNeedle · 08/07/2015 12:29

It's fair enough for people to decide that an arrangement isn't going to suit them if it has to be cancelled last minute, I don't think the other clients have done anything wring by saying they'd rather look for someone else instead of wait four weeks for a service that they rely on. It's likely to be them that misses out though, good cleaners that work hard for the time they are paid for and are trustworthy aren't easy to come by ime.

The problem is that one of the clients was rude to her. There's no need for that and it's just nasty, selfish behaviour. Your cleaner is better off without the one that was rude to her.

ShirleySmears · 08/07/2015 13:08

It's like when a valued staff member tells you they're pregnant. You're thinking "oh bugger" but you have to remember to smile and congratulate them. You are genuinely pleased for them but the natural self centred reaction is to think about how it affects you.

But You Must Not Let It Show

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