AIBU?
Spider laid eggs on babys coat: what do i do?
Freakingthefeckout · 06/07/2015 18:01
Just that, I found a spider on the coat of the baby I'm looking after, I tried to get it to go from the coat to a tree trunk outside and eventually it did, but it was reluctant. Only now I've realized there's a clutch of eggs covered with a web on the coat. No idea how to remove it without destroying the eggs, mother spider is gone. Kids mother will be home any minute.
Help?
VoyageOfDad · 06/07/2015 18:03
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Message withdrawn at poster's request.
Freakingthefeckout · 06/07/2015 18:57
Yes, it's for real. I don't see the need in killing something for the sake of convenience and the spider had made a very secure pocket in the fold of the coat to stash the eggs in. I'd have had no dilemma if I'd been willing to dump a kettle of boiling water over them. I've seen people getting spider advice here before, I figured it was the best place to get a quick useful response (rather than the Reddit stock responses '0/10, pics or it didn't happen, cool story brah.')
Anyways, just as I was getting ready to remove the webbing and the eggs, another spider popped out of the coat sleeve and made straight for the eggs (wasn't the mother, she was safely on the tree trunk outside) and looked like it was trying to tear the webbing to eat the eggs 
so I had to get rid of that one too. Then I managed to very slowly remove the egg sac with all of the eggs intact. They're stowed behind a vine out of the rain now.
The toddler thinks the baby spiders are going to call me Mummy 
Toofattorun · 06/07/2015 22:58
Get a mixture of cyanide, bleach, hydrofluoric acid, 2,3,7,8-Tetrachlorodibenzo-p-dioxin, strychnine and last but not least, febreze (to make it smell nice you understand), mix it together and drop said coat into concoction. Then fucking bomb the house and live in a sealed oxygen tank.
Littlegreyauditor · 06/07/2015 23:13
Burn the shit out of everything. EVERYTHING.
Start with the coat, scorch the garden, bomb the house, leave the country.
Do not use a dyson/Hoover. The fuckers will hatch inside it and solemnly march out the spout en masse.
(Weeps at memory, scratches furiously at self, gibbers)
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