To think DP should care that he's hurting me during sex?

[Pained1]

DP has this habit of digging his face right into my shoulder during sex. If he's not doing this, he's further away digging his face into the pillow. It's hardly romantic is it, that he can't be arsed to hold his head up during sex!! So this morning when he was digging his face into my shoulder I told him he was hurting me (bare in mind he has longish stubble too so it feels really sore). As a result he stopped completely. I told him that if he just stopped hurting my shoulder there wouldn't be an issue. He says there is no other way to do it we tried again and he immediately starts it again. I asked him to lift his head so I could look at him at least and he says it's not possible . He's managed before. He then decides he's too tired to carry on anyway and stops!!
AIBU to think he should care that I'm being hurt and also to think that this is a really lazy and disrespectful way to have sex on with someone?

Agree Pictish.

Blimey op, is he this inconsiderate out of bed too? How long has he been like this?

Nothing the OP had posted so far indicates that she's interested in what her partner wants/likes, only about what she would like him to do. She's also posting about a position where she's expecting her partner to do all the work. That's how it reads to me anyway. Others may interpret differently.

Clearly he doesn't sound energetic or interested in her pleasure either!

Agree with MamaLaz, it's pretty degrading for you.

I don't know about LTB but certainly TTB because YADNBU.

That's not lovemaking, that's using your body for an assisted wank

Agree 100% with this. He's using your body as a convenient vessel for his assisted masturbation.

"Nothing the OP had posted so far indicates that she's interested in what her partner wants/likes, only about what she would like him to do."

FGS, Oneday, don't be such a meanie! She hadn't indicated that she's not interested in his feelings and demanding that he actually lifts his head up and acknowledges the person he's having sex with is hardly her being a high maintenance diva is it?!

Do have a

Maybe he's under confident rather than selfish. You can go on top OP, or you can have a lazy shag both on your sides, facing each other or not, or doggy style. God there's so many ways to fuck, take control, you both might enjoy it.

Hehe thanks I'm gluten free though

I didn't say she was being a high maintenance diva- but it's a two way street. Sex isn't something your partner does to you, as we all agree. The whole thing sounds mismatched really. Completely agree he sounds absolutely crap in bed, btw.

Do you like having sex with him op when his stubble isn't hurting you?

Do you get on, how is your relationship in other areas?

I don't think that's what oneday means messy

It takes two to tango, sex should be two people enjoying sex and foreplay together, whats described sounds pretty crap and selfish from him and a lay back and think of England from her. To change this it's to be talked about before the event, find out what turns each other on. Also try going on top op, then you can be incharge.

Next time, if there is a next time, you go on top and gently press your thumbs into his eyelids. When he complains that it's uncomfortable or hurting him, tell him "there's no other way....."

Op- oww that hurts.
Dp - I can't be arsed then. (Stomps off)

Posters- op, you are a lazy/selfish lover.

The mind boggles.

Just let him push his face into the pillow then if that's what he wants to do?

The pillow wouldn't bother me. I'm don't always need deep and meaningful eye contact. Wouldn't like being made to feel I had done something wrong to complain about pain though. That's not on.

I don't like lots of eye contact either. Only sometimes.

sounds like he needs to work on his upper body and core strength! Lots of planks and press-ups needed. He also sounds rather selfish but I don't know what to advise for that other than getting him telt.

DisappointedOne that made me cackle!

Just read your post disappointed - made me cackle as well.

Eye contact isn't that much of an issue for me but I wouldn't want DH just lying on top of me with his face squashed into a pillow while he was ramming into me either!

I don't know how men can even have sex in the on top position. It's like holding a plank position for several minutes. I get exhausted on top after a few minutes and I'm basically in a sitting position.