to ask my F- in -L to control his dog

[LG]

my 79 yr old f in law has a 3 yr old german shepherd dog which he has never managed to control/train. Last time we went there (for fathers day), the dog jumped up at my 11 yr old DD (it is as big as her), ran at her and put its jaw around her legs leaving scratch marks from her teeth. This happens every time we have tried to go out in the garden. My f- in law cannot control the dog or get hold of her. The dog is simply too strong. The situation only ended when my DH came and screamed at the dog and we were able to run indoors. My f-in-law told me not to come any more as he wasn't going to get rid of the dog. I'm fine with that but my DH say I can't stop my daughter visiting with him as its not my decision. AIBU to think this is wrong and that my F in law shouldn't have this dog. (It has attacked him as well causing him to need hospital treatment).

I am shocked and appalled that your husband wants to put the daughter in a situation where she will be attacked by a large dog.

FFS he sounds like a monster :(

He hates being shown up how little control he has over the dog
and a man's pride is always the most important thing isnt it

stupid stupid man

Oh, to hell with analysing FIL's motives or DH's. Just tell them both that DD is not going there until the dog is gone. End.

Can they come to you? Or you take parents out to the park/cafe? I know it mightn't be practical though?

You just don't take dd there. DH is on a very sticky wicket insisting his dd must be exposed to another attack if he wants! Meet at a restaurant instead. Or he picks up pil to come to you.

Really don't see why an elderly couple should have their day to day loved companion and support (the man is living with a wife with altzeimers, he probably depends on the dog) removed/killed so a child can occasionally visit in safety for a few hours. They will likely not see that as anything like a fair transaction, will likely never forgive you for it (or dd) it will be devastating for them, and that kind of devastation is awful at their age, not to mention they won't appreciate being so drastically 'done to for their own good' which is on the officious/patronising side. If they don't keep the child safe on visits she doesn't visit and pil have told you that's their decision. They're elderly, not children. So no more visits at their house, problem solved with least damage to everyone involved.

Was nothing done when the fil was hospitalised due to the dog attack?

This dog is a serious incident waiting to happen.

Astonished that a dog can hospitalise an elderly man and nothing be done but perhaps I am being naive.