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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Aibu about pil's dogs

20 replies

Dogprobs · 26/06/2015 08:55

I have a 4 week old baby and an 18m old dog. Dog is easygoing and has taken to baby well, obviously I'm never going to leave them alone together. He can be quite excitable due to his age and jumps a lot which I'm teaching him not to do.

Since having ds we have been to my dm's house once. She has a dog from the same litter as mine, who is twice as jumpy and bounces all over visitors as they enter and will climb on your head if you dare sit down. Dm locked dog in another room for this visit.

Baby has not yet been to pil's house. They have 3 dogs who jump, bark and one has even bitten bil's friend (a teenager not an adult). They can't be locked in another room as previous attempts at this have shown they can break back in! Pils don't mind that they jump over everyone either. I'm not so bothered about the two non-biter dogs but the one who bit bil's friend I am terrified of.

My question is aibu to say we aren't taking baby to pil's yet at least til he's bigger because I'm scared of what this dog could do? Especially after what happened in the news last week to that poor baby. Also dogs could jump and accidentally harm the baby!

OP posts:
TerrorAustralis · 26/06/2015 08:59

YANBU. I'd be terrified.

But be prepared for fallout. Some people have a massive blind spot when it comes to their aggressive dogs.

MythicalKings · 26/06/2015 09:00

YANBU. Dogs outside or you don't go.

StockingFullOfCoal · 26/06/2015 09:00

YADNBU. I'd also be terrified.

ImGoingForATwix · 26/06/2015 09:01

I wouldn't say you'll never visit them (that may not go well), but you could say that you're worried about the dogs around the baby and would like to know they'll be out of the room if you visit. I know you say this isn't an option but how are they able to break back in? Can the dogs be left outside in the garden during a visit?

PaigeMahoney · 26/06/2015 09:04

YANBU. At all. Had exactly the same problem in my family but as PP says watch out for the fallout. The dog owners in my case went completely batshit at the suggestion that the dog be kept in a separate room to DC. We don't see them anymore.

SumThucker · 26/06/2015 09:05

I have a dog myself and also a baby. I absolutely wouldn't take my children anywhere a known biter was, and would expect no visitors to call at my house if my dog had bitten before. YANBU.

Dogprobs · 26/06/2015 09:35

When pils lock dogs in another room the dogs are now wise to it and can open the doors and get back into living room and kitchen. They could always be locked outside however, good idea. Thanks for the reassurance, i couldn't decide if I was being sensitive or pfb

OP posts:
CoogerAndDark · 26/06/2015 09:39

YANBU at all and I am a dog owner with a bouncy one myself. Somewhere secure or I wouldn't go.

Gileswithachainsaw · 26/06/2015 09:43

Yanbu.

they are idiots having dogs and not training them. or addressing issues properly so they don't jump all over people, bite or escape all the time.

Poor dogs

muddymary · 26/06/2015 10:15

Yanbu. I am a dog owner with a jumpy dog (we are addressing it; we just haven't been successful yet!) and even though I'm 99% sure she would never hurt a child, she's still put in another room when young children or people who don't like dogs come to visit. When babies/toddlers are around, I just think better safe than sorry.

Handsoffmysweets · 26/06/2015 10:34

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request

Dogprobs · 26/06/2015 21:35

The baby has to come first in all instances and protected from avoidable danger surely! Thanks all.

OP posts:
Wolfiefan · 26/06/2015 21:39

You are so not being in the slightest unreasonable.
Wasn't the dog from that awful episode put down? I may be wrong. Put it to your relatives that you'd hate that to happen to their beloved pet!

WeAllHaveWings · 26/06/2015 21:51

Yes wait until the baby is older around 16 yrs and dogs will be gone by then.

We have a dog, but I still wouldn't take a baby, toddler or child to a house with uncontrolled dogs.

Purplepoodle · 26/06/2015 21:53

They can get dog gates, similar to baby gates but bigger and stronger

sadwidow28 · 26/06/2015 22:05

I have a dog (totally calm and submissive) but he gets put in a separate room when non-dog-lovers visit. My Mum can stand him if he is in his cage (which makes him fell very safe from my Mum) Grin

I would never introduce a bouncy, untrained, non-aggressive dog to any child under the age of 14 years. I use 14 years as my cut-off because I can teach a 14 year old how to turn their back, ignore and use strong voice commands. I won't allow a dog to control an environment under any circumstances.

Babies and children first - dogs are secondary. But it is wonderful if a child can actually play (under supervision) with a family pet. My DN was terrified of dogs but eventually my dog became his reading companion, the snuggle pillow, the friend he cried on when he missed his deceased Daddy.

ChickenMe · 26/06/2015 22:16

I would say dogs in garden but then it's getting quite hot atm so you might want to go in the garden.
Sorry to hijack but I'm in a similar predicament. IL's trusted old dog died so they are getting a puppy. I have a three month old baby and I don't know how to handle it.

Pastaeater · 26/06/2015 22:28

YANBU at all. Stand your ground on this and do not let anyone pressurize you into a situation that you are not comfortable with.

Dogprobs · 27/06/2015 23:28

Thank you all I'm glad Im not the unreasonable one. Today the three dogs were locked in the back garden and we were in a room at the front of the house.
I've even gone off my dog atm and almost want rid of him which is sad because he's a good dog :(

OP posts:
PiperChapstick · 27/06/2015 23:32

YANBU. Peoples ignorance towards their dogs is astounding, trust your instincts and get them to come to you

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