Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To come out...

26 replies

TheMummalo · 24/06/2015 18:58

that I have Aspergers?

OP posts:
TheMummalo · 24/06/2015 18:59

very afraid tbh

OP posts:
Saltedcaramel2014 · 24/06/2015 19:01

Brave and honest - there's no need to be afraid

AnnieOnAMapleLeaf · 24/06/2015 19:02

I have zero experience of Aspergers, but my gut feeling is that there is no reason why you should feel as though you need to hide this aspect of yourself. It may be a naive view, but I firmly believe that mental health issues ought to be out in the open - hiding them away only further entrenches the idea that it is abnormal.

Whatever you decide, I wish you strength. Flowers

MrsTerryPratchett · 24/06/2015 19:03
Flowers
MaggieJoyBlunt · 24/06/2015 19:58

YANBU Smile

twirlypoo · 24/06/2015 20:01

YanbuSmile

My brother has aspergers (diagnosed as an adult) he said everyone finding out made it easier as he didn't have to try so hard to fit in all the time.

I wish you well for the future Thanks

MrsJamin · 24/06/2015 20:08

Annie... mental health issues? Aspergers isn't a mental health problem!

OP - YANBU, be honest and people will appreciate it.

CrohnicallyAspie · 24/06/2015 20:12

I'm 'out' on here but not much in RL- my close family and a few colleagues know but that's it. I want to do it but I am worried that the people that don't like me (particularly at work) won't have their opinion swayed by the revelation, and might even think I'm making it up for attention or whatever. And the people that do like me already accept me quirks and all. So I'm not quite sure what would be gained.

MaggieJoyBlunt · 24/06/2015 20:18

I hope you don't mind me hijacking slightly to post this NAS survey link here where lots of aspies and their relatives will see it. Pplease consider completing it yourself OP.

It is a a survey NAS are running to inform a planned campaign tackling public understanding of autism. Annie's unfortunate 'mental health problem' remark brought it to mind. Thanks Smile ;

www.surveymonkey.com/r/?sm=vKymRb574SC6CkFSUyTmmKGsgIbw7DfqZfXE56WTYFXs2TWMYxjexspbgtEipaX7ujkvFJ8NJtKZoK5zvOHTGJTJb9Ky602T5nzNnTabE9i5WgouLUTVXIlD%2B2n%2FFbedwlSnWdl38pMV2lbwI%2FG3LPrIx%2BHQ3%2BhmBuB8%2B4iXtoPBQtdmG5e2ZAW8Rl7D9%2BcPmjrPBbvFp%2FKQrmIA2VUV9fk59y8jv5qfY08XmEb2E0xv4bt6owkDwW1mK9EMQo6TG77VoFTAN7e1Lvl%2BkGIyVA%3D%3D

maryhadalittleham · 24/06/2015 20:20

Mental health issues ? annie WTF ?

Wolfiefan · 24/06/2015 20:24

YANBU. What a shame Chronically. People shouldn't have to hide this or worry about how other people will react. Time to educate the public?

WoonerismSpit · 24/06/2015 20:24

Before everyone jumps on annie, I don't think she meant it offensively, she just doesn't know the correct terminology. Her heart was in the right place.

WoonerismSpit · 24/06/2015 20:25

Obviously she needs telling it isn't right, but don't everyone jump on her.

MaggieJoyBlunt · 24/06/2015 20:25

Abbreviated link

MaggieJoyBlunt · 24/06/2015 20:26

Agree Wooner - I think it was unfortunate rather than unkind. (Let's hope she doesn't come back and stand by it, thereby proving us wrong Wink )

ToadsJustFellFromTheSky · 24/06/2015 20:35

Tbf to Annie, I have encountered quite a few people who think autism and Asperger's are mental illnesses. I think it's a common misconception.

There just isn't enough awareness out there.

CrohnicallyAspie · 24/06/2015 20:37

And toads I got my diagnosis via mental health services, previously my problems had been misdiagnosed as depression and anxiety, I can see why people might get confused.

ToadsJustFellFromTheSky · 24/06/2015 20:41

Very true CrohnicallyAspie.

While we're on the subject, what is the best way to correct people when they are under the impression it's a mental illness? I watched a presentation about mental illness a few years ago and it contained information about various different mental illnesses and amongst them was a slide about Asperger's. I didn't really know how to tell them it wasn't a mental illness so just kept quiet.

AnnieOnAMapleLeaf · 24/06/2015 20:47

I am so so sorry for my ignorance! I genuinely did not know the correct terminology and did not mean to offend anyone. Sad

Spottypjs1 · 24/06/2015 20:53

If I knew someone who didn't always react in a way I would expect them to, I would be relieved to know that there was a reason. I would certainly not judge them negatively, I think it would ensure that I am more understanding of unusual behaviour. I think you should let people know and that will hopefully promote discussion and understanding about Asperger's.

LokiBear · 24/06/2015 20:56

I work with a lot of autistic and aspergers pupils. My brothers both have aspergers. My youngest brother once told me that he saw all humans as computers. The neurotypicals' brains are running microsoft Windows. However, Aspies are running Apple softwear on a Mac. Both computers have the capability of producing a word processed document. However the Mac can do it with a little more flair and in a way that leaves Windows scratching it's head. You can't teach a Mac to run like Windows, but you can still read the word document and that is the most important thing. I use this analogy with pupils all of the time. Having aspergers isn't a secret that should be hidden. Be the best you thst you can be and be happy with yourself.Flowers

AnnieOnAMapleLeaf · 24/06/2015 21:17

Can anyone provide guidance as to under what classification autism and Aspergers would fall? I hate the thought that I have operated under the assumption that both fell under the heading of mental health.

Again OP and everyone else, I am truly sorry if my abject ignorance caused offence. It genuinely was not intentional.

MamanOfThree · 24/06/2015 21:25

Loki I love your image with the computers! I'll steal it if you don't mind.

SaucyJack · 24/06/2015 21:30

Whilst I know that it's factually incorrect to describe ASD as a mental illness, anyone who thinks it's actually offensive needs to take a look at their own prejudices before jumping on the PP.

OP- I hope you find peace. Best wishes xx

EllenJanethickerknickers · 24/06/2015 21:33

I think of it as a developmental disorder. My DS2 has ASD and his development is disordered. But that's not the whole story as some areas never 'catch up' and develop differently. Hie brain operates differently to a neurotypical one. He senses the world differently and in his case he's mostly under sensitive.

The NAS talks of the triad of impairments, difficulties with social communication, interaction, imagination and added to that rigidity of thinking, need for routine or obsessional interests etc. They call it a lifelong developmental disability. Though some with ASD or AS may disagree that it's a disability, more a difference.

Swipe left for the next trending thread