Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask how or why you found your way to Mumsnet if you don't have children

123 replies

Tangerineandturquoise · 17/06/2015 18:07

And aren't TTC or don't see yourself having children in the near future .
I read some threads and responses and see that some posters seem to be in this boat.

OP posts:
alltoomuchrightnow · 18/06/2015 00:21

Maybe the OP doesn't have children?
To me personally, it's more 'womensnet' or 'people net' than mums. It's a place where can safely have a rant/ ask a q/ ask for advice or support/ share something/ have a laugh.. /advise others if able to/ review something... etc etc

Original poster
Tangerineandturquoise · 18/06/2015 00:33

Right it isn't or wasn't a hostile question but a genuine one
I joined Mumsnet under a different name when I was pregnant several years ago after seeing an article in The Times- I miscarried but I don't use that as a weapon as someone else seemed to
I left Mumsnet because actually to me it was at the time quite a painful place to be just by it's title
As to the person who posted about how offensive I was because her sister is infertile if you want to talk about infertility go have a look where else I post on this site

I was just curious wondering how some people end up on here- for instance someone a few days ago posted about being in a relationship where her OH didn't want children and I thought so how did you find AIBU?
Someone else posted on a thread that basically said they didn't ever want children and I thought Hmm why choose Mumsnet
I find some people could be offensive offended and snarky about the opening of a packet of crisps if they wanted to.

All I wanted to know was what was special about Mumsnet for some people that they come here even though the website name isn't relevant to them
Some people have responded with the sort of things I was wondering about friends- media etc

OP posts:
Feawen · 18/06/2015 00:36

MitzyLeFrouf, oh yes indeed! Strolls off in the direction of Style & Beauty to discuss the perils of vpl and white britches.

I hope this wasn't a goady thread. They upset my faith in human nature.

Feawen · 18/06/2015 00:37

Apologies for cross-post (and vpl reference).

SmashingInAthleticWear · 18/06/2015 00:41

Came across it when Googling for people who regret having children/hate parenthood (never wanted kids myself but at the time was in a relationship with a man who did). I mostly just lurk, but I stayed for the humour, the creative swearing and the Relationships board - silently cheering on the depressingly huge number of women making their escapes from their complete cunts of partners.

SmashingInAthleticWear · 18/06/2015 00:43

Cross-posted, but maybe I've answered Tangerineandturquoise. If you google "regret children" Mumsnet is the top result.

SmashingInAthleticWear · 18/06/2015 00:44

And the second result for "partner doesn't want children"

TheFormidableMrsC · 18/06/2015 00:52

Came to the site when I was on my knees with grief when my husband left me for somebody else. It saved my life, literally. I also know plenty of childless people who use this site and quite a few men. It's an amazing resource!

Trills · 18/06/2015 00:53

Because the internet

Bahh · 18/06/2015 01:43

Step kid!

I am still such a lurker though.

possum18 · 18/06/2015 01:53

Looking for advice and reassurance whilst ttc

jenkait · 18/06/2015 02:02

I'm Canadian and my friend in the UK recommended it to me. We're both ttc actually but even if we weren't, I would love mumsnet! I enjoy the questions and how helpful and caring so many people seem to be. Most posters come across as genuine and lovely! I always liked advice columns, and I like comparing my own reaction to a question to others' points of view and gaining different perspectives.

Also: I love the British English words/phrases we don't use over here ("stroppy", "get on with it", "have a go at" etc.) and I find myself wanting to use them in conversation. I read so much mumsnet that the other day when my dad mentioned "tea" (the drink) I thought he was talking about dinner!

jenkait · 18/06/2015 02:04

I'm Canadian and my friend in the UK recommended it to me. We're both ttc actually but even if we weren't, I would love mumsnet! I enjoy the questions and how helpful and caring so many people seem to be. Most posters come across as genuine and lovely! I always liked advice columns, and I like comparing my own reaction to a question to others' points of view and gaining different perspectives.

Also: I love the British English words/phrases we don't use over here ("stroppy", "cocklodger", "get on with it", "have a go at", etc.) and I find myself wanting to use them in conversation. I read so much mumsnet that the other day when my dad mentioned "tea" (the drink) I thought he was talking about dinner!

jenkait · 18/06/2015 02:07

Sorry for the double post! Still learning :)

LackOfAdhesiveDucks · 18/06/2015 02:16

I'm Canadian as well, but have been a member of a UK based equine forum for nearly 10 years (and did live in the UK for a year). An OP on that forum was directed here by someone when they asked a child related question and because I was curious I took a look around. That was about 3 or 4 years ago and I've never left. I don't post much but I love reading, there are so many topics that aren't child related at all!

MsRhettButler · 18/06/2015 02:18

I probably stumbled across a MN thread while I was googling something else. I originally just stayed to laugh at the more hysterical AIBU threads (Blush), but after a while I started to realise that there were normal lovely people here facing real problems and giving out real, good advice. I can't count how many things I've learnt just from lurking.

I think a side benefit of reading MN is that stemming from childhood I've had emotional issues regarding children, and often I just tried to box that away as "I hate kids, can't stand them" to the point where it started to become real. I don't want kids at all, but hearing the 'other side' of the story, the struggle that some mums face bringing up their kids, has helped me to deal with this emotional baggage and become a much kinder, gentler person around children.

Smile
ToastedOrFresh · 18/06/2015 03:47

Pink pearl clutcher - I don't read the childcare boards....I read all the random shit you lot yap on about grin

This^. Thanks, coming right back atcha !

SteveBrucesNose · 18/06/2015 04:09

Through a forum war

There's was an one pf many anti-dubai thread on mumsnet which started looking at expatwoman and generally bitching about how bitchy, spoilt, entitled all the posters there were.

Expatwoman wnded up having a post about it. I followed the link, spent a while with my knickers in a twist on all the daily-mail-esque 'facts' about dubai which were being spouted as true over here whilst laughing and agreeing with all the pisstaking of EW posters. I the. Got banned from EW and got suckered into AIBU

ToastedOrFresh · 18/06/2015 05:13

I heard about it on mainstream media and it was referenced on other chat sites too.

I didn't think I would be welcome here as I don't have children. Don't want children & no intention of pretending otherwise. Yes really. People like me exist and do live happy, productive lives as part of the wider community.

Curiosity led me here. It's funny. Infuriating. Informative. Interesting. Keyboard warriors galore of course ! To me, it's a magazine that updates just about every hour.

Somebody once rounded on me as they genuinely believed that MN'rs are their friends right down to doing Secret Santa. Oh yes. This was in response to someone breathing new life into the 'Penis Beaker' thread by creating the ultimate, 'TAAT' thread about a thread.

I said that Penis Beaker summed up MN perfectly for the banal rubbish that it really is. IMO.

I agree with those that reference the subjects on MN that have got nothing to do with parents or children. Which, tbh, is the majority of discussion subjects.

Mehitabel6 · 18/06/2015 05:40

Someone asks this question every few months. I have no idea why. It is far more interesting to have the widest possible readership. It is quite possible to come on and have discussions that have nothing to do with children.

AnnaFiveTowns · 18/06/2015 06:15

I googled "plastic v wooden windows" when we were renovating our house and a thread from Mumsnet popped up; it was absolutely hilarious, some of the posters were extremely quick witted and funny. I then delved a bit deeper and somehow ended up on AIBU and I couldn't believe how politically and socially aware the (majority of) posters were. I hate to say it but prior to this, Mumsnet had conjured up images of boring discussions about breastfeeding, potty training etc. and I say this as a mum. Actually, it would have been very nice to have had all the info at my fingertips when the kids were younger but it just sounded so dull that it didn't cross my mind to go onto the site.
I'm so glad I stumbled across it; it's now my go to for pretty much any problem and most of the posters are intelligent, articulate and thoughtful. I also like the fact that, as a bit of a leftie living in DailyMailsville, the political views on here are quite refreshing.

ClashCityRocker · 18/06/2015 06:20

Out of 100 threads currently in active, only 35 are actually about children/motherhoods/conception - there's always been enough to keep me busy.

Google anything and a MN thread comes up.

ProudAS · 18/06/2015 06:26

I was previously a regular on Raising Kids until that was discontinued. I mainly used to post on the autism board and share my experience of the condition. I originally had similar intentions on mumsnet but found AIBU addictive

Lovemydogs2015 · 18/06/2015 06:29

I am glad it's a genuine question. I have seen these threads turn unpleasant before, which is why I was wary.

Mrscog · 18/06/2015 06:29

I now have 2dc, but found MN 2 years before we TTC dc1 after searching for something random, probably property/style related. Found it a really interesting site and just stuck around.