Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

TTC when I'm supposed to be a bridesmaid in 6 months

43 replies

Vespar7 · 16/06/2015 19:36

I'm a bridesmaid for my best friend and just found out the wedding will be in 6 months. I was about to start TTC this month but now I'm wondering if it's a bit selfish because my dress will need major altering if I do fall pregnant and I suffer with awful morning sickness for the first 4 months so won't be much help with planning. Even though she is my best friend I don't want to discuss it with her because I am a bit superstitious about falling/being pregnant. Should I just wait 6 months even though I'm desperate for a baby now?

OP posts:
MrsBojingles · 17/06/2015 15:46

Crack on. I deliberately bought my BMs loose dresses (two birds) as I knew one was TTC. If she's a true friend she'll be delighted for you.

DinosaursRoar · 17/06/2015 15:46

agree don't wait.

Is it going to be more of a DIY wedding? if so, she might need lots of notice to rule you out of jobs/tasks, but that should be fine if theres lots of other family and friends to help out, and give you nice 'sitting down' jobs to do!

Purplepoodle · 17/06/2015 15:49

Go for it. If you fall preganant just pay to have the dress alteres

MissBattleaxe · 17/06/2015 15:52

Go for it. If you fall preganant just pay to have the dress alteres

Why? She is doing the bride a favour, not the other way around.

OP- just carry on. It's somebody else's wedding and fertility is a funny old thing. You could get pregnant in one month or twelve months. Life goes on despite your friend getting married. Good luck!

Ethylred · 17/06/2015 18:01

As long as you're not TTC with the groom go ahead.

icelollycraving · 17/06/2015 18:19

ethylred Grin
Crack on but don't tell her unless you get pregnant.

NRomanoff · 17/06/2015 18:29

Has the dress been measures up yet? If so I would offer to pay for alterations if I got ph. Just because I wouldn't want to incur the bride my more expense, for me.

But I wouldn't not ttc. My sil asked me to be bridesmaid knowing I was ttc and got pissed off that o got of, even though she wasn't gettin marries for 18 months and my son was 6 months old by the wedding. It causes no end of problems. Never been the same between us since

Original poster
Vespar7 · 18/06/2015 20:28

All of the bridesmaids are meeting up in a month to talk about dresses so I guess I could try and subtley suggest something that would work over a bump. I have been planning for the last 6 months to start trying this month and I just found out a few days ago that the wedding is in 6 months. She got engaged very recently so I was thinking it would be earliest next summer. Am going to crack on as it might very well take even longer than 6 months though hopefully not!

OP posts:
Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 18/06/2015 20:32

No you get on with things, you can't be expected to put your own happy magical event for someone else's no matter who that someone else is. The world don't stop for or revolve around Brides to be!
Oh good luck

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 18/06/2015 20:32

Sorry missed the words on hold out there

flubberbust · 18/06/2015 21:58

Just do it. If my best friend/bridesmaid was pregnant for my wedding I'd have been thrilled for her.

Good luck Smile

maddening · 18/06/2015 22:00

Well even if you catch first month you will not have a newborn which is the better way round :) and you can be sober sensible bridesmaid.

littlefrenchonion · 21/06/2015 12:13

DH didn't get to be best man at his best friend's wedding - I went into labour the day before! They didn't mind one bit and were really happy for us.

DD was born at the same time they were saying their vows!

scarlets · 21/06/2015 13:44

You sound like a lovely friend. I'm sure she'll be happy for you if you get pregnant, whatever the timing.

By the law of averages, you'll probably be in the early stages in 6m time anyway, with no need for a bigger dress.

mileend2bermondsey · 21/06/2015 13:55

Why? She is doing the bride a favour, not the other way around
Confused How is OP doing the bride a favour?
If a bridesmaid was to put on 3 stone between the fitting and the wedding, should the bride be expected to pay for her alteration too?

MissBattleaxe · 21/06/2015 14:30

Being a bridesmaid shouldn't leave you out of pocket at all. Costs should be covered by the bride.

mileend2bermondsey · 21/06/2015 15:21

I cant agree with that at all. The bride has done her bit by paying for the dress intially. If the bridesmaids gain/lose weight to the point their dresses need altering they cant expect the bride to foot the bill. Thats totally UR.

MissBattleaxe · 21/06/2015 17:09

Well surely they should be altered near to the wedding and not several months before? Also I disagree that anyone asked to be a bridesmaid should be expected to pay for anything to do with the task.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page