aibu to feel hurt by this? DM had a birthday recently - extended family invited

[NoahVale]

including me and mine.
however the evening before they met for a meal, she told me a few days beforehand, but said she hadnt mentioned it as we might not be able to afford it.
in the end i really wanted to go, just to prove something.
but being such short notice my dc couldnt come - we Could have gone

quite peeved about this attitude.

If your kids weren't fussed/ had other plans and are teenagers could you not have gone without them and had them get a bus home or left your husband to pick them up?
I agree I'd have felt miffed at not even being asked and would wonder if I'd been excluded for some other reason.
Do you get drunk and noisy at family occasions or do your teenagers?
Your mum would have been better not mentioning the meal or just saying she didn't want everyone there and wanted the big occasion the next day.