Why are people so awful over money?

[alphabettyspaghetty]

I just don't get it.

We've had two instances now where money has ruined a friendship both where people have borrowed money and not paid back or had something from us with intentions to pay us for it and haven't.

The second one has really annoyed me it's my dps car (not a expensive car £300) we have had £100 from the person but nothing else. My dp has chased and i'm about to chase but I know for a fact they have had a takeaway tonight (it's a neighbour) and I saw her dp coming out the local shop with 2 bottles of gin... I don't get it. The first thing I do when borrowing money is pay it back asap. Just frustrating that kindness is being taken for granted twice now.

What's the money for?

Has the person who got the car been allowed to take possession of it without paying in full?

The first one my dp bought someone a festival ticket on the promise they would pay him back when they got paid. They even went to the festival then made excuse after excuse when they got back all while posting on the dreaded Facebook about trips to London, a handmade specialised pc they built etc etc

So they owe you money for a car ? What about the first one!

Ilovesooty

Yes that's what I'm probably more annoyed at dp about. He just signed over the car. Frustrating

The first one was a different person by the way!

Get yourself to judge rinder.

Going forward, payment in full or no deal. Simples.

Yes you'd think dp would have learnt after the first one... I just thought that friends wouldn't do that. Obviously I'm wrong!

It's horrible when that happens op. My sister does it to my mum all the time. So hurtful when they clearly put your last in the list of their priorities. Don't be so kind in future.

Has you dp been proactive chasing the money? What has he done? How many times has he reminded them. I think id be looking at the small claims court

Can you text or phone his friend by x date.

Yanbu! This is not small amounts of money, I don't understand why you wouldn't pay someone back! Go to their door op.

Dont lend money. Ever. It clearly doesnt work for you. Decide on a new policy with DP now. No lending, even if its a tenner until tomorrow. Zero lending policy. Seriously it is the only way to avoid this problem.

Your DP clearly has terrible judgement combined with shitty "friends" who are taking the piss. He needs to protect and assert himself, this is unacceptable.

You and your DP need assertiveness training. Allowing someone to take possession of a car without full payment is foolish. You need to stop 'loaning' anyone money at all.

"Neither a lender or a borrower be" is good advice.