AIBU re cigarettes or is my husband?

[Miskate]

Background: my husband and I used to socially smoke and have 1-2 cigarettes of an evening after work. When I fell pregnant last February I stopped immediately, and he stopped smoking when I was around but would maybe have one when I'd gone to bed.

Since giving birth I've mainly stopped smoking, but on occasion, when drunk on a night out for instance, I might have one. Husband is the same OR SO I THOUGHT. I came across his secret stash when tidying up yesterday afternoon, so decided to hide it. He is fuming with me this morning, as he says he went to look for his cigarettes after I'd gone to bed and he couldnt find them, so he spent ages looking for them when he could have been finishing off a work project he's been doing in the evenings.

Was I wrong to hide them? Obviously I COULD have had an adult discussion with him about it but I chose not to.

Now it's all written down I can see that he didn't lie to me, but it seemed like a lie of omission that he hadn't told me he had these cigarettes in the house.

Yes because you're trying not to smoke, and he doesn't want to enable/encourage you.

If you were on a diet and didn't want to eat biscuits, he might hide them from your view too, which imo would be completely sensible.

It's not lying unless you asked him outright if he has cigarettes in the house, and he said no.

He waited for you to find them.

Perhaps he is annoyed with himself for his inability to stop smoking and didn't want a lecture from anyone else about it. If he was actually intending to hide them then presumably there are better and less obvious places around your house than the one he chose?

Tact is the way forward here. Agree when and where etc. Ask if he wants to stop and whether or not you can support him in that if he does. Don't lecture or try to dictate though.

The bedsharing and SIDS thing- does it still apply if you shower and stuff?

I've apologised and bought him a Frijj. I am quite glad I posted here as it's given me some food for thought re trying to not be a turkey about these things.

You're not supposed to turn all reasonable - I might have to retract my comment when I said you were a bit crazy

I mean, YOU'RE ALL WRONG AND A PILE OF WANKERS. CAN'T BELIEVE NOBODY TOLD ME TO LTB, NEVER COMING ON THIS SITE AGAIN.

I've apologised and bought him a Frijj

A brilliant solution to all marital strife

As I understand it, yes it does, as the problem is your breath (not just the smell but what you are breathing out, even b/w cigarettes).

Of course yabu they are his cigarettes you cant really think it was a good idea to hide them just why?

Pshhh a frijj milkshake? Was it full price and everything? Can't believe you appologised for being unreasonable. Who posts on aibu gets told they abu then says "yep sorry I was" and appologises to their husband? You might break mn...