To think my bag isn't too extravagant!

[TheoriginalLEM]

For my birthday last year my DD and DP bought me a Cath Kidstone bag, admittedly it was £70 which is a big wedge of money but it was a birthday present and i absolutely love it, its still as decent as when i first bought it despite me chucking it around in my usual way. Ive never been a bag person before and its nice to have somethig that is mine and nice. I never spend money on myself, i cut my own hair and all my clothes come from charity shops. I live in converses which are full of holes and a pair of tk max birkies and in the winter my northface boots i got from john lewis sale for £40 are on their second year and will last at least another.

Some work colleagues spotted my bag and were all "oooh get you with your cath kidstone bag" (actual words) and when i said it was only £70 and a birthday present there were raised eyebrows all round.

I can't imagine i'll have to buy another bag for a loooooooonnnng time and surely that is better than buying several "copy cat" bags on the market for £15?

It made me feel really bad actually and its playing on my mind because we really don't have very much money at alland whilst the bag imo wasn#t expensive, it was to us,the eyebrow raising colleagues are far better off than us so was I selfish? Have i been too long on the school playground were all the mums sport mulberry bags? I just thought Cath Kidstone was a standard, relatively cheap make? .

Honestly, I think she was just being nice. In some cultures being nice is more obvious: "I think your new bag is lovely." but in the UK and Ireland there is usually more a bantering element to a compliment and while it's definitely a nice bag, it's not exactly like you turned up with your arm weighed down by a Celine trapeze. She wasn't being snarky about your unbridled extravagance - I think she just meant "I am pleased to see that you have a nice bag".

You don't need to justify spending on basic grooming and presentation. I'm getting the impression that you have too much of a hang-up about your own self-worth and either quite low self-esteem or a touch of martyrdom. Even if you don't have very much money, if you have a job you are pretty much required to look groomed and presentable. Getting your hair cut by a professional and buying clothes that haven't been used is not extravagance, and nor is it expensive - it is perfectly normal and you DESERVE it and you. There's no virtue in saying "oh I've always cut my own hair" or prefacing Birkenstock with TK Maxx.

I have to admit i have a thing for bags. I just think that different situations require different bags! I have been able to control it now, if you have a bag that is nice, fullfills it purpose and you use and was a gift i dont see the problem. It would be silly to leave it in the closet like some of mine

It's not that much money to spend on a bag, that's why you should have just ignored her.
My bags all cost more that, but they all last years and years. Makes more sense than buying a cheap one that will need replacing every few months, to me.

I thought you were going to say you'd bought a seasonal Louis Vuitton (I.e. Non classic style that won't increase in value)

Of course YANBU!!!

maybe the raised eyebrows because you said 'only' £70. I mean, £70 is quite a lot of money to many people and 'only' makes it sound like you think it was cheap.

Regardless, I think you are overthinking it and your colleagues may have been surprised as kath kidson doesn't sound like a brand that you would normally shop in.

Oh fgs at my workplace, this would be a bonding comment. As in, an opportunity to have a bit of a laugh.

OP you're overthinking it. Get over it! (Not meant bitchily)

I'd just reply "I know, right?!" I had this recently when I got some new glasses and opted for "designer" ones - someone said literally the same thing "Ooh get you with your designer glasses!" And I said "I know, right? Aren't they awesome?" And that was that. The person didn't need to know that I claimed 90% of the cost back on my insurance :)

It's your bag, your money, your life. Own your choices! I always go with a yay me! approach. I don't justify anything to anyone, why should I :)

OP, just enjoy your lovely bag.

Now this is a gorgeous but expensive bag

Some people like to get competitively cheap when it comes to bags. Head over to Style & Beauty and you'll find all sorts of sniffy responses to people spending hundreds of pounds on a bag, like it's some sort of crime

You love your bag, and £70 isn't much in the grand scheme of things. Don't let anyone make you feel bad or too extravagant.

Cat kidson bags are rubbish. My dm bought me one as a bday pressie. The strap failed. Go to fatface. Their bags are lovely x

My fatface one cost £28 and looks amazing one year later...

Take back a Cath Kidston bag if it breaks - they'll mend it or replace it.

I work on a cost per use basis. £70 is a lot for a bag you'll use once - if you use it every day it's a bargain.

Why does it matter what she thinks? One person thinks £70 is too much, to another person £700 is a bargain.

You can't change her thoughts about your bag, so let it float past you. Life's so much less stressful when you don't give a toss what other people think.

I would say 'get you and your fancy bag' if a friend had Cath kidston bag, but wouldn't think they didn't deserve it, would be jealous mainly ! Enjoy it

Ignore the comment and enjoy your bag.

I love nice bags - not blingy branded ones, I prefer nicely-made practical ones made in good leather. My daughter calls me the Imelda Marcos of bags but I don't care!

Blondie i tried that they werent interested as its now old stock. Ill just never but anything else from cath kidson. Prefer fatface bags now anyway.

It is standard and cheap. £70 for a bag isn't much. Perhaps she was being sarcastic

That's bizarre! It was a present! I have a £500 Louis Vouitton & a £250 Vivienne Westwood bag (both gifts on separate special occasions). It's not like I would buy one everyday so if somebody said that I'd tell them to F off! Cath Kidston is cute & she sounds jealous...

I don't thin £70 for a bag that was a special present and a treat by family members is ridiculous extravagance.

Now the idiots that put their names on waiting lists for £500 bags and then discard them a year later because they're no longer the latest thing..... I would love to sent them out to the 3rd world for a few weeks voluntary work. They have seriously skewed priorities and need a major reality kick up the arse.

'think' and 'send'.

Sorry!

You're overthinking it

They're probably just a bit envious - Cath Kidston is not my cup of tea personally, but most of my colleagues would comment on someone bringing a new CK thing into the office.

FWIW we are far from minted and I don't think £70 is a ridiculous amount to spend on a good quality bag as a gift for someone special at all.

I actually would have been raising my eyebrow at your "it was only £70!" comment. £70 to me is a fair bit of money and would never be "only" that value!! I wouldn't bat an eyelid at someone treating themselves or their spouse to a bag of that value but WOULD have commented with the initial comment they made like "ooh get you! Cath Kidston bag, lovely!" Type of thing, Because that's a compliment, and most people love to receive those, it's just cooing over someone's birthday present to make them feel good!
I would have been VERY at your wierd "it was only £70!" defensive comeback instead of saying "ha ha I know, I'm a lucky girl" type of thing that most people would say.