To be upset that Bruce Jenner has chosen my DDs name as her new identity?

[Soupsetrightnow]

Before anyone starts hating on me I am one for live and let live. I have no issues with transgender and other such things. I really do believe in just letting people be people and judging if I like people based on their actions and words NOT on their age/race/gender/sexuality etc. My erractic friendship circle is proof of this. However in this case I am really upset because of the following concerns:

My DD is already currently being bullied, both verbally and physically at school. She is a timid child and often comes home upset. School are helping but there's only so much they can do.

The name she has chosen is not just the same but the same (somewhat unusual) spelling.

My DD is old enough that there are kids in her school year who WILL see the magazines, covers and name in the press. I don't want to out myself but she is into double figures so not young kids here. We are talking hormonal kids old enough to see and understand this stuff.

Kids are mean and nasty. I've been there and my DD is already there. It took me 7 years to shake a nasty nickname I was given in primary school.

I am just dreading the bullying getting worse. It only takes ONE person to see it and start "Caitlyn was a man" and she could be stuck with it for years.

AIBU or I am I being PFB about this? Please someone reassure me I am over reacting :(

I think you are overthinking it. I think because your daughter is in the very distressing situation of being bullied you're hyper vigilant and anxious and that is understandable.

But I think you should calm down and cross this bridge when you come to it. If it does become an issue you can coach your daughter to respond with a withering put down about how she understands that all people are different, although they are obviously too silly and immature to understand that. And how she is proud to share her name with someone who's stood up to bullies and been proud to be who he really is.

Sorry, ignore me. I didn't realise Caitlyn was official. I thought it was another rumour.

Caitlyn is also the name of his sons gf! If anyone should feel annoyed it would be his son.

It's official now and it is Caitlyn. The news came out today and Bruce is now officially Caitlyn and using female pronouns.

Thank you for the perspective and for the understanding from those who do.

Changing schools isn't an option. The other local schools are horrific in comparison and I had to fight to get her in the one she's in.

Here's hoping if anything comes of it we can turn it to good. If it comes up I think I will sit down with her and actually show her how positive a role model she has been and how great so many people think she is.

Whilst I can see that the potential for bullying would worry you - (kids pick up on anything and I can see that being the type of thing kids would find) I think you should worry about it if it happens, which is unlikely and not pre-empt it.

She had to pick a name, you don't have the monopoly on that so in that respect YABU, sorry.

I think you are overthinking it. I think because your daughter is in the very distressing situation of being bullied you're hyper vigilant and anxious and that is understandable.

I am and tbh I know I am and that's why I posted. I wanted to get it out and read back everyone telling me to stop being pfb and calm down about it.

We have decided that IF it comes up we will talk to her about Caitlyns story and how much good her transformation has done for people who are marginalised by society. She knows what transgender is but not this story as she has no interest in gossip mags/reality shows etc.

Thank you all.

You need to be getting angry with the school for not dealing with bullying.

An article I read in TES once said there would be about one transgender child for about every 300. The school needs to be taking action so this discuss sensitively - because there will be such children in every secondary school.

Her, her, her, her, her.

She, she, she, she, she.

Bruce Jenner has chosen her new name; she has every right to choose whatever name she wishes to.

The DM are shamefully transphobic and use inverted commas around 'she' to present their hateful attitudes and perpetuate transphobia.

Bullies bully for anything. You're over-thinking.

An article I read in TES once said there would be about one transgender child for about every 300

My story was part of that article. It was after Lucy Meadows killed herself.

DS1 has just suggested that Jenna Jenner would have been a nice name :)

I'd worry less about this and more about what the school are doing (or not doing) about the bullying.

I'd tell her before it comes up with the bullies. That way she will know what to reply.

Replies to bullies:

1. oh are you transphobic? How embarrassing for you.

2. most people get the name their parents give them. She chose her own name and chose mine so reckon it's a better name than yours

3. i was surprised too, who would have thought she'd have chosen a name with the same first sound as the kardashians but spelt it with a C

4. fuck off

OrlandoWoolf - great of you! It was about the same time that a child at DDs primary school decided to identify as a girl instead of a boy - the school handled it very very well, despite being a C of E school.

Is this real? Spelling being similar or not, many people have this name, of course yabu!

It's a lovely name, your daughter should embrace it not be ashamed of it! If bully's pipe up then just tell them to do one!

I'm pretty sure he didn't spell it with a K intentionally !
Good on her though, looks bloody fantastic

^^Ruby she does

I had a look on twitter & like the Kardashian / Jenner family or not/ indifferent to them/ don't know or care who there are the way they are all supporting Bruce/ Caitlyn is outstanding & I think it's probably made this transition 100x easier & they should all be applauded.

As for the name it's just a name & a catchy hashtag it'll blow over & pretty sure most school kids would go who?

When your child is being bullied reletlessly i think its like a kick in the stomach for parents you feel useless powerless and heartbroken for your child this has stirred emotion about your caitlyn however you know you are being sensitive to this yanb to think this might be another bloody thing for you dd to endure

if these bullies are as bad as you say they are then the school needs to step in and sort it out.
i would contact a solicitor if the school wont step up.

I hate the Daily Mail, however I think I read that Bruce Jenner as was referred to his female side as 'Her' (his quotes) so for the purposes of grammar, the DM referred to 'she', rather than using it to belittle his change. (It's a minefield, now I've just called him him, rather than her, because I was using the old name. Happy to use she now she is Caitlyn!)

I think the OP is suffering from a badly worded title, rather than actually blaming Bruce/Caitlyn. I know you are just worried about more ammunition, rather than thinking the name was chosen to cause your daughter difficulty! Try not to over think it, it's unlikely to come up, but maybe think of some witty retorts she could use if it was used to bully her? The existing bullying itself is the real issue here.

Well, Kim has just announced that she is expecting their second child, so hopefully that will be the topic of conversation.

Is your DD getting adequate Pastoral support? I agree that bullies will always find a reason to bully.

I understand where you are coming from and agree with the pp above about preparing some comebacks in case it is an issue

Have a chat with Caitlyn before school as a pp suggested.

You know it's not rational to blame Bryce/Caitlyn for any new bullying. The bullies, their parents and school need to deal with it. You need to love your dd and give her a few come backs of ignoring them isn't working.