I've always been quite strict with regards to meal times and keep treats to a minimum.
Yesterday we had been out for the day and both DC'S (5 & 22 months) were very well behaved so I told them that if they had a good attempt at eating their dinner, then they could have a small milky bar as a reward for their good behaviour.
I like them to try to eat a good amount of the food that is on their plate but I am very much against forcing them to eat every last morsel on their plates. We have always gently encouraged them to eat vegetables or at least have a try of whatever is on their plate and as a result, up to now, they will both try anything and will eat most vegetables put in front of them. I wait 30 minutes after them finishing their dinner to give them a treat.
DF decided yesterday that this wasn't good enough for her and that they should be eating everything on their plate!! I told her that I disagreed but she went ahead and told them that if they didn't eat it ALL up then they wouldn't be getting a treat, by this point they had both eaten 1/2 to 3/4 of their dinner Which is usually when they both decide that they are "full" (which is why I wait 30 mins before giving them their treat).
Until this point they had both been cooperative and well behaved and had both at least tried a bit of everything on their plate (we had beef stew with carrots, peas, turnip and mash) but due to her forceful attitude they both started to act up and get upset. They both ate a good amount and I made sure that they both got their treat half an hour after they had left the table.
I explained to DF that we had tried the "you must eat every last scrap on your plate" approach and that it turned mealtimes into a battlefield but when we backed off and gave more praise for what they did eat,they were more willing to try new things and ate more. She just responded "we always had to eat everything on our plate and it never did me any harm." I had to hold myself off from responding "apart from being at least 5 stones overweight."