To hate nosey questions?

[Bishopston]

My main pet hates are nosey/interfering people. Although I've definitely made social 'slip-ups' along similar lines in the past - if I feel I've asked someone a question that's a bit on the intrusive side, I IMMEDIATELY regret it, and I must admit, I do it VERY rarely as I hate nosiness so assume other people do too. In the past year or so I've been asked questions by relative strangers about issues ranging from my weight to my sex life!!! I have a general tendency to feel obligated to reply honestly to intrusive questions - must be the 'people pleaser' in me lol. But then I feel angry with myself and the questioner afterwards. Any advice?

Haha love it MrsAsprey - I sometimes lead nosey peeps up the garden path - albeit easier to do if you're expecting the
questions than caught off guard!

I find if you deflect with three co-operative non-answers they tend to give up without it seeming too awkward.

you can often anticipate and prepare a handful of responses : )

Eg if you have the kind of job that everyone would have an opinion on

Where do you work?

Oh I work in

but what is your job?

Ah, I work in an office

and what do you do

well, it's mostly admin and customer service

or eg if you have been off sick

oh getting there now thanks

thanks, appreciate your concern, I am feeling better than I was

yes, it's been a tough few weeks but I'm just looking forward to getting back to work

Questions don't bother me in the slightest. If I want to keep information to myself, I do. I don't dither about it, feel uncomfortable, and then blame the person asking the question for my discomfort.

Who are these people? What are they asking? I like the misleading idea. Lets have some practice goes!

• Are you ok now? What was wrong with you? - Badly infected ingrown toenail. It's ok now. It's been removed. I did it myself, using a .....

• Did you plan to become pregnant again? - Well it got a bit confusing. Turns out the unicorn urine ritual that I had used the first time works for another decade. Who knew! I tell you, I wouldn't recommend it if you're on the cautious side...

That makes it sound like Cluedo - we could make up cards : )

TyneTeas - this tactic does work - I've tried it myself:
Q: Why are you working here
My Reply: I signed up last week
Q: No, I mean where did you work before
My Reply: Tells slight variant of the truth which can't be double checked!

And yes randomAXE I need to try your tactic - your response makes sense!

I hate nosey questions too. Because i have a large family it seems a free for all in regards to nosey sods. No i will not tell you my salary, its enough that i've just told you i work isn't it, no i will not start telling you the size of my home, what time the kids go to bed, how i find time to have sex/study etc. what the fuck does it have to do with anyone else?! I get you i really do.

My neighbour will just come out and ask whatever seems on her mind. Like many others on this thread if I am asked a question I tend to just give the honest answer. I was getting quite annoyed by my neighbour's questions especially as she was totally unforthcoming about herself.

Then one day last summer she decided to tell me about everyone living in the close. We have lived here for a year, she has been here about 10. The detail was just amazing. It made me realise that she had been asking everyone the same probing questions.

Since then I have actively avoided contact with her. I don't want my life retold to everyone else. I came to the conclusion that she had too little going on in her own life to waste such a lot of time on everyone else's.

Glad to see so many people feel the same way as me! Renniehorta, not surprised you actively avoided contact with her, that level of intrusion sounds a nightmare!

Crazy people! Its like they thrive on telling people how much they know about so and so...hmm strange

at Renniehorta's nosey neighbour!!!

A neighbour once told me some extremely intimate gossip about another neighbour. I've avoided gossipy neighbour ever since!