To not pay for these shoes?

[MsMarvel]

Dp had dsd this weekend, as he does every weekend.

On Saturday we went to a farm park and had a great day. When dsd was going down a slide, she scuffed the back of her shoes and wore away some of the rubber, as she tried to slow herself down.

It was a shame yes, shoes are now a bit scuffed bit she's a child, was playing, and shit happens.

Dad's mum has just been on the phone ranting about the damaged shoes, saying it was dp's fault and that he should pay to replace the £25 shoes.

AWBU to refuse to pay this? Surely damage happens to kids clothes, shoes etc and it's no ones fault, just something that happens??

Were they new? Does he pay towards her already? Yes kids do that but maybe she needs to be reminded not to.

Well, if she can't afford to replace them then either her dad buys new ones or his daughter goes without.

But if mum is making a fuss to be making a fuss then he needs to sort it out, calmly.

Yes he pays towards her through the official channels, as well as paying towards her when he actually has her obviously.

The shoes were a gift from someone, which dsd told us. So dp knew straight away that ex was lying when she started going on about how much she paid for them, and she had to totally back track when he queried it.

The shoes are still perfectly useable btw, slightly scuffed at the back so they don't look brand new any more, but not by any means ruined or needing replacing.

Well what shoes were they? either they were keep nice shoes or They were shoes for wearing.

between them they need to buy shies fit for purpose or just deal with the fact that shock horror shoes will get worn or scuffed with kids being kids.

either she needed to ask your dp to chip in for some quality shoes that won't look like shit after a normal kid activity or she takes the consequences of the cheap crappy ones or the ones not suitable for her child's lifestyle she chose to buy.

Why would you send your children out to play in clothes you dont want them to damage through normal wear and tear.

But dp needs to sort this with dsd's mum

They were just normal trainer type shoes, they were probably a bit more expensive than normal because they had flashy light things on them, but nothing out of the ordinary, that you would think about keeping for special instead of wearing for a day out.

Ex seems to be constantly grabbing for money, which wears very thin. Dp contributes for dsd, but ex is always demanding more. This latest thug will have come from the fact that apparently her tax credits amount has gone down since she move in with her partner, and that because of this dp should give more money. When dp tried to explain that his financial situation hadn't changed and that he was unable to change the amout, she went crazy.

Well then trainers are for wearing. her choice to forgo sturdiness for flashy lights. your dp isn't responsible fir her buying unsuitable items.

He's paying through official channels, and gives more when needed. He's doing enough, she should send her dd out to play in appropriate clothes and shoes.

Thing*

From the point of view of the mother, would you be annoyed if your child came back from their dads with scuffed shoes, but that it had been done on a nice day out? Surely the child enjoying themselves is more important than not looking immaculate?

Mine have come back with wet shoes, trashed clothes and all sorts. That's just life. The mum sounds a bit unhinged.

YANBU.

The Mum sounds like she's using it to have a go at you both.

All sorts of things used to happen to our clothes when we stayed at our dads. The only time I ever remember my mum asking for a replacement was when she'd sent me with a brand new top. It got wet and step mum dried it on electric heater resulting in a huge hole being burnt through it. That was not normal wear and tear. YANBU

She's asked for money to replace a white t shirt that I accidentally put in a dark wash recently, and it came out grey. She asked for double the amount it cost, and then went mental when we instead went to H&M where the top was, and bought it instead.

She had no reason to get annoye but she had clearly just wanted the money.

In that instance though we accepted responsibility for replacing because it was my mistake that ruined it.

Trainers are meant for playing in, and they're bound to get scuffed and dirty. It's ridiculous to expect to buy some more just because of a bit of scuffing.