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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask if Thai massage parlours in the UK....

80 replies

cuddingandpustard · 29/05/2015 10:50

.....are actually brothels??

A work colleague went on holiday to Thailand and mentioned how much she enjoyed the traditional massage she had over there so I mentioned that there's a place near me that does them and why doesn't she go there for another. She laughed and asked didn't I realise that Thai massage parlours are brothels?

Am I completely naive? If I wandered in one Saturday afternoon would they look at me like I was insane? Do people actually visit them for traditional massage or is it really all hand-jobs and pearl necklaces or whatever goes on in brothels?

Enlighten me Grin

OP posts:
CombineBananaFister · 29/05/2015 13:33

Think your friend was running with the seedy stereotype in-joke Sad but as others have shown there are varying degrees of 'customer service' at massage parlours so she isn't completely misinformed, nationality not withstanding.

When I was at uni we did actually have a thai massage parlour a few houses down from us above a hairdresser and it was dodgy but blatently honest about what it offered. The phone box opposite (giving age away there) gave explicit rundowns and prices of services it offered - not sure how they got away with it tbh. It got shut down so many times then opened with a new name.

TengoSueno · 29/05/2015 13:50

When I used to work at a newspaper I had to phone up the 'massage parlours' when their adverts were up for renewal. We had a symbol for the genuine ones. I remember a lady coming into reception one day who asked me about 10 times if she needed to provide her certificates! She was most pleased when I said we never checked. Grin

betseyfly · 29/05/2015 14:00

I was sitting at a bus stop in Shaftesbury Ave the other day with my 8 yo DD. The Bus Stop is right in front of a Chinese 'massage' parlour. The Women in the doorway, enticing men inside, were all wearing extremely short skirts, lots of cleavage, thigh-length boots, high heels, lots and lots of make up, big hair etc. I felt a bit uncomfortable sitting there TBH.

That is all.......

TheGirlFromIpanema · 29/05/2015 14:11

I feel sorry for proper massage therapists who are (from what a friend tells me) subjected to this sort of shit reasonably regularly Sad

She stopped working from home after a particularly nasty run-in with a disgruntled twat, over the phone when booking I should add, because she was scared as she had already given him her address.

Trinpy · 29/05/2015 14:25

winter I meant that we were told to always refer to ourselves as therapists to avoid confusion. You do have to be very very careful with the words you use. And yes, unfortunately there are many men who will assume a woman offering massage is a prostitute unless it's really clearly spelled put to them that that is not the case.

BettyCatKitten · 29/05/2015 14:50

A friend of mine is a masseuse and will only have female clients as men have 'asked' for extras in the past.

member · 29/05/2015 15:08

I'm still aghast at the French polishing tbh; how did people know who would genuinely shine their antique bureau?

inMansplicable · 29/05/2015 15:28

I know a lovely Thai woman who owns one, and to make matters worse, it is in the local city's well-known "street" for prositution.

As far as I know she is a nice, cultured lady and there isn't anything untoward or unsavoury about her establishment, despite the perception on the part of other people that it must be a knocking shop.

niceandwarm · 29/05/2015 15:39

French polishing! Who'd a thought it Shock No wonder the person I found in the newsagent post cards to french polish my book case was absolutely useless at it Grin

Lilylonglegs · 29/05/2015 15:52

When I went to Thailand the massages were all dirt cheap but I noticed they only targeted men so thought maybe it was a happy ending type of massage so stayed away. I can see how someone would think that personally.

TattieHowkerz · 29/05/2015 19:55

I went one in London, in the basement of a restaurant. It was basic, but good. Not a brothel. They had signs everywhere saying not to ask for sex etc. felt a bit sorry for the women working there, I assume they had to fend off harassment from customers Hmm

Pantone363 · 29/05/2015 20:00

I booked DP in for a thai massage in Poland.

Yep, turned out to be a brothel. The receptionist was LOVELY to me. Brought me tea and magazines whilst I waited. DP came out and said it was a bit weird when she asked him to remove boxers and she shrugged when he declined. When we googled it was a well known and reviewed brothel!

Sizzlesthedog · 29/05/2015 20:21

I want to back up Trinpy

I am a therapist, and the word "parlour" is code for brothel.

We were always taught not to advertise massage.

I had to decide to only treat females after many years of people thinking I did "extras"

Really expensive salon, and aged 19 I was asked by a regular female client if I treated her partner would it still be the same treatment as she had or would it be different (wink)for him really pissed me off.

Changeasgoodas · 29/05/2015 20:37

It was explained to me on holiday in Thailand to only go in places that had a sign for "Traditional" Thai Massage, if you saw massage without traditional, it was likely a brothel. Don't know if that still holds there or here.

Poly - so upset by what you have written, how can someone be so casual that there may be trafficked women suffering in a property they are earning money from?? Please, please, please check these places out, all it would take is someone sitting outside surely for a few hours to know.

crouchenddadder · 07/05/2017 13:00

It is very mixed. The key I use is how pushy the sales process is when a man walks in the door. Places that specialise in hand jobs will quickly try to usher men into a service, while giving women a cold shoulder (roll eyes or mumble, breaking eye contact, not giving any confirmation that a slot is available)
I truly believe many businesses do both, and simply let the staff choose their customers based on what kind of service they are happy to provide.

crouchenddadder · 07/05/2017 13:09

What does "Carry On" mean?

Destinysdaughter · 07/05/2017 14:04

When I was in Thailand I had a couple of massages there. Lovely and relaxing. Was a bit taken aback tho when the female therapist massaged my breasts!

emilybrontescorset · 07/05/2017 14:23

How depressing for genuine therapists.
I would go to a health spa to be certain.

Graffiti1975 · 20/05/2022 01:32

This reply has been deleted

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BobLep0nge · 20/05/2022 01:52

Zombie thread

Kitkatcatflap · 20/05/2022 01:56

Years ago I used to walk past one that had a sign saying 'no extras' in the window. I am so naive, I assumed it meant being your own oil and towel - every day is a learning day.

Sortilege · 20/05/2022 02:14

I think any time you see the words “massage” and “parlour” together it’s sex work. Legit massage places don’t call themselves parlours.

Sortilege · 20/05/2022 02:14

BobLep0nge · 20/05/2022 01:52

Zombie thread

Oh FFS. So it is.

User3568975431146 · 20/05/2022 02:16

I have been to Thailand several times but never had a Thai massage as I have back, neck and shoulder problems and I'm worried that it'll make things worse.

There are a couple of Thai massage places close to me but you have to be naked apart from your pants (my friend went who didn't mind and said the massage was really helpful) but the naked part is a no go for me!!

DteamTheMoors · 20/05/2022 02:46

I can only speak on the U.S., but a very well known (actually famous) professional football (American NFL) coach got arrested at an Asian massage place in Florida in a surprise! raid.
I never heard if he was charged, but I’m told the “customers” never are - only the workers. Seems like there wouldn’t be workers if there weren’t any customers. Perhaps it’s a chicken & egg thing.

Plus, everything happens in Florida. In fact, google “Florida man” and your birthdate and see what comes up.