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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Don't want an x-box in the house.

47 replies

Goldmandra · 27/05/2015 16:43

DD1 (18) has just finished Y13 exams and will be off to university in the Autumn.

She is, quite reasonably, revelling in her free time, spending lots of time at the stables, and lounging around in her room on social media. She's also going to help me redecorate most of the house over the summer ready to put it on the market.

She has decided she would like to buy a second hand x-box. She has the money in her savings so wouldn't need us to contribute.

However, we already have iPads, laptops and a Wii in the house and the whole family spends far too much time on screens ignoring each other. DH will have no self control and want to play on it night and day and DD2 (12) will be desperate to get on it but DD1 will have ownership so I foresee lots of conflict.

Added to that, I think DD1 ought to be saving her money because we can't afford to help her out an awful lot with her living expenses when she goes away.

I am being a massive killjoy and I know I don't really have the right to stop her but she is a good girl and won't get one without my blessing.

IABU aren't I?

OP posts:

Andrewofgg · 27/05/2015 17:35

YABU - and it's for you to tell DD2 that it's not hers and she can't use it. DH is another issue!

Original poster

Goldmandra · 27/05/2015 17:48

it's for you to tell DD2 that it's not hers and she can't use it.

I'm sure she will be able to use it with DD1's permission. These things just have a habit of making feelings run quite high, don't they?

DH has just said he won't want to use it which is hilarious!

OP posts:

ThinkIveBeenHacked · 27/05/2015 17:51

Id just say she needs to sort a tv for her room for it to go on. Id not be happy about it taking over the family tv.

Athenaviolet · 27/05/2015 17:53

I hate x boxes too.

I managed to keep them out of my house for years but eventually renaged.

Now I barely see ds at home unless he's had it banned.

So I understand how you feel.

But what I find quite about your op is dh will have no self control.

What a man child!

Is he like this with other things?

Andrewofgg · 27/05/2015 18:25

Goldmandra It's threads like this that make me glad we only had the one. Any my only sibling is a sister seven years my senior - I rarely cast covetous eyes on anything of hers except her bigger room and I knew I wasn't having that!

Original poster

Goldmandra · 27/05/2015 19:13

DD1 says MNers are awesome.

Now we just have to decide where it's going

OP posts:

Preciousbane · 27/05/2015 19:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Seriouslyffs · 27/05/2015 19:47

We held off having an consul until a year ago when DC3 was 14. It's in the only living room, which is great as we all moderate it's use. Were it in a bedroom or playroom it would probably get more use. As it is it's not only in competition with watching TV, but with listening to music, reading quietly etc. I suspect that DC3 has been on it for hours today (I was at work) but as he was also at the library at 9 and has obviously been to the gym (sniff) and can often go for weeks without going on it, that's fine.
My meandered to is that it's good to have it in the family room.

PurpleCrazyHorse · 27/05/2015 20:29

We have a PS3 and two Wiis. In fact one was bought for DD by my DDad (who at 5yo doesn't really play it), and one we got free that I use with the TV upstairs so I can watch Netflix in bed

TBH I think they're better in communal rooms as everyone has a say in what the TV is used for. It's therefore not much difference than choosing what TV channel or movie to watch.

DH plays on the PS3 a fair bit but not at the expense of family stuff and often plays with DD which she loves. As it's on our main TV in the lounge, I also want to watch trash so it's a bit of give and take

FlabulousChix · 27/05/2015 20:29

I'm assuming she has full student loans and hasn't been penalised by your incomes? I hope so and if not that yabu not supporting her. Not the child's fault they do t get full grants and loans due to parents incomes. Re the x box she is 18 what she does with her money is her decision. You can't compare a wii to an Xbox there is no comparison.

JCDenton · 27/05/2015 20:30

I'd be fine with it too. I'm always surprised by how many people on here 'hate' consoles and games. It smacks of 'what I like is ok, but what you like isn't'.

FlabulousChix · 27/05/2015 20:31

A PS3 is better for stand alone games but not online gaming. If you want to play with friends the Xbox is better.

Mamiof3 · 27/05/2015 20:33

She's an adult let her buy what she wants

It's an Xbox not a gram of coke

Mamiof3 · 27/05/2015 20:33

Ps I was once addicted to the Sims though, don't get the Sims

MrsGentlyBenevolent · 27/05/2015 20:37

I agree, tell her to get a ps3. I bought one with one of my first student loans and never regretted it. Excellent for gaming and tv watching, plus no need to pay extra for internet as with XBox. I'm totally biased though, as you can tell. Leave her to it either way,at 18 she's entitled to buy one and keep it to herself without being annoyed by siblings/parents over it.

Original poster

Goldmandra · 27/05/2015 20:44

yabu not supporting her.

I didn't say we won't be supporting her! I said we won't be able to help her out an awful lot.

Thanks Flabulous. I think she wants to play online with some of her current school friends as a way of keeping in touch so perhaps the Xbox would be better.

OP posts:

Original poster

Goldmandra · 27/05/2015 20:45

I bought one with one of my first student loans and never regretted it

I may not share that idea with her

OP posts:

MrsGentlyBenevolent · 27/05/2015 20:56

In my defense Gold, it was a treat, I could afford it. I still managed rent, food, books and a just a couple of drinks. I was very well behaved.... mostly.

crazykat · 27/05/2015 21:09

At 18 it's her choice as long as it doesn't need to be hooked up to the main tv.

We have a wii, two xboxes, laptops, tablets, a couple of dsi and smart phones between the six of us. The kids tend to self regulate screen time and they only get used when the weather means they're stuck inside. The eldest two dcs tend to go and play minecraft together while the younger two drive me nuts play together or they all watch a dvd through the xbox I'm their room.

Holdonforonemoreday · 27/05/2015 21:30

she's studied really hard, is off to Uni, you should be so proud of her.

Are you proud of her, why exactly are you wanting to deny her an Xbox?

What are you hoping she will do with her time instead?

Original poster

Goldmandra · 27/05/2015 21:54

you should be so proud of her

I couldn't be prouder of her. You have no idea of what she's overcome to get to this position and I am in awe of what she's achieved.

I want her to have a lovely summer filled with friends and horses and having fun. She deserves it more than most. I don't want to deny her anything.

I just don't really want another games console in the house. However, I'm prepared to accept that IABU and I've told her she is welcome to buy one. In fact, she is sitting with DH at the PC right now working out what she is going to get and from where.

OP posts:

maninawomansworld · 28/05/2015 16:47

She's 18 , of course YABU!
Unless an item is illegal or dangerous to the rest of the family then she can buy what she wants.
If your DH will be a problem than that's for you and him to sort out , it has nothing to do with her.

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