to complain about the noise

[thegreatwideopen]

Hi all,

Have NC for this. I live with my child in a rented flat which shares a common stairwell. The neighbour across from me is in her 50s, and has family round fairly regularly to visit (have 2 children, one about 4, the other around 1) but when they leave, the 4 year old can be noisy in the stairwell (chats to parents, sings to himself etc), which can echo in the stairwell. They have to go past my door and down a set of stairs to get outside. It isn't particularly late when they leave (anywhere from 6 -8pm) but aibu for wanting to complain to them/local authority? Would I have any grounds for action? I haven't lived there long, only a few months.

You want to complain about a 4 year old who sings in a stairway and talks.....

I think you should phone the council.

Can I be there when you do?

Utterly unreasonable, yes.

That's normal noise. My neighbours are all nice quiet people - the only time we hear them is when they leave their flat and chat on the way out. It's normal behaviour. I'm sure that's the only time they hear us.

Be thankful you don't live in my old flat, which came complete with neighbours who had drug fuelled karaoke parties till 5am, did drug deals in the hall, had a pack of feral (sweet but totally neglected) kids running riot till the wee small hours every day, dogs that fouled the hallway, constant swearing/shouting at each other etc. plus broken windows, anything that wasn't nailed down got pinched, etc.

Oh and at least one dawn raid by the police a month.

That's bad neighbour noise. Yours sound rather nice.

Yes, I am prone to overreacting. And perhaps I just expect more consideration from other people (I went to everyone's doors when I moved in to let them know I'd be doing DIY) But I can understand that they are just leaving, and I would feel awful asking them to keep a 4 year old quiet. Neighbours are all quiet in the block, so I really could be worse off.

I don't feel that isolates, plumped, as I do manage to get out and about, just think this issue in particular might have spiralled in my head!

Thank you all again for your replies, I do appreciate them.

Can you put up a heavy curtain behind your front door to try to add an extra 'cushion' between you and the sound?

It might only make a tiny bit of difference, if any at all, but it's got to be worth a try - sounds are always worse when there is nothing but hard surfaces for them to bounce off.

Flisspaps, I will give it a go, as it's worth a try.

Depends how long he's in stairwell... if less than 10 mins YABU. If he's playing out there while adults are inside, you could have a word with neighbour... after all a stairwell is a communal area not a playground. Years ago we lived in a flat where neighbour would let her toddler play noisily in stairwell (shouting and banging the metal rails to hear the echo) which was very irritating.
If it really bothers you and you don't want to confront anyone, maybe put a polite notice on inside of the front door, reminding all residents to keep noise down in communal areas like stairwell. Sometimes people just don't think and his mother is probably unaware he's disturbing anyone.

OP, if you ever speak to your Nieghbours do you think you could ask them. It's the type of thing that I wouldn't mind being asked if it was done nicely in an almost apologetic manner iykwim

Another thing that you could do depending in the neighbour is put a notice up, you would need to make it a polite, lighthearted and friendly request.

" As I said in my original post, they do have to pass my front door. Sometimes they leave just as I have DD settled, as it can be around bedtime."
Could you have a nice thick door curtain over your front door to deaden any sound from the stairwell? They also do a sterling job of cutting draughts!

Yes, Lilac, if I am totally honest it's just en route to the street that he's in the stairwell for. He doesn't play out in the stairwell at all, only on the communal ground to the front, and inside.

Deep down, I know I'm being unreasonable, I just needed to hear it from others, I guess.

Neighbours are all really quiet - two retired (but active) folk downstairs, girl with a baby upstairs, a family on the other side with teenagers, and the lady opposite me who, like I said, is in her 50s or so.

I will give the curtain a go. Again, if I am to be totally honest, he isn't screaming, jumping or whacking things, just chatting to parents and singing. He probably does love the echo. So perhaps the curtain will do the trick

BTW I don't think it's unreasonable to expect neighbours and visitors to keep noise down in corridors/stairwells... noise carries, and letting a 4-year-old sing loudly so he can 'enjoy the echo' is a bit inconsiderate of the people who live there. So YANBU to feel irritated, it's your home... visitors should be reminding their DC that he is in someone else's home and needs to be quiet when arriving/leaving via communal stairwell, people might be having a nap or trying get babies to sleep.

Op, that sounds like you are very lucky to have such good neighbours generally, so I am glad you are not going to rock the boat by complaining. Try and focus on the positives rather than dwelling on the one small negative.

Totally unreasonable. You should try living in my house at the moment - next door's landlord has sent in full building works after the last lot moved out. Start before 7am most morings, including Saturday and Sunday. Not only heavy machines but loud music to drown out said machines. Only to stop to have loud conversations and dirty jokes. I'm not sleeping at all at the moment, so being woken up by these arseholes makes want to storm around and shove their jackhammers up..... Anyway, I have to reason with myself that it's just short term, it will stop eventually and other people have a right to make some noise.

You can't complain. You can put a note on your door saying Quiet Please Baby Sleeping (I had one when ds was tiny in case of visitors and regularly accidentally on purpose forgot to take it down ) if they choose to ignore the sign, there's not much else you can do though

I don't think there would be any problem with politely raising this with your neighbour - it's not a big ask that the guests be slightly quieter as they go down the stairs, and I'm sure they have no idea they're creating a disturbance. But going to the council is madness!

living in flat you are sometimes unfortunately going to hear your neighbours. i wonder if the retired folk downstairs from you hear your child playing sometimes. i have 2 kids up stairs from me who have just had two more kids who run up and down the hallway and their cat plays with something on their bare floor late at night. i have a polish couple downstairs who must presume if you scream at the top of your voice it means you are enjoying the sex more. they both make revolting noises. if they had woke up ds13 up last night i didn't know what i was going to say to him that they were doing. i am going to go down today and ask if they could please put some music or telly or anything so i don't have to listen to their fecking screams. rant over!!!

YABU.

It's not constant noise. You complain, they will throw it out. Quite rightly.

Just out of interest, why did you feel the need to name change for this?