To not share my discount

[Ijustdontknowwhattodowithmysel]

I get a discount for a spa day, i can get it for a third of the price for me and two thirds for a friend. I have no money at the moment but neither does she. I'd like to go with her but I don't mind going by myself, but I'm just wondering if it's really tight of me to invite her at two thirds off otherwise I'm basically paying more. Is this really tight of me? Don't mind if people say I'm being mean, I haven't decided yet but I'm thinking I might just go by myself.

I'm confused. If she's getting a discount you ARE sharing it. Just because your discount for you is cheaper again, she's still saving money. Are you asking if you should subdidse the difference so you both pay an equal amount? I wouldn't.

I don't understand.

Is it 1/3 off for you on your own but if your friend goes you pay full price and she gets 2/3 off?

Why would you subsidise a discount for her, with a discount intended for you. Surely the price is the price, the discount is the discount and you your proportion of the whole cost?

I think if the OP goes on her own it will only cost her 33% of the normal price, the other person would get it for 66% of the price so if they both go together it would be 100% of the cost of one person.

If they split that cost, OP would be paying 50% for herself rather than 33%

Is that right?

I think the OP is saying she feels she ought to pay half the overall price so they get the same discount.

YANBU - take the full discount you get and do the same for your friend. Otherwise you are effectively subsidising her trip, when you are happy to go on your own. No need to mention to her that you are getting a larger discount if it will make you feel uncomfortable.

No it's 1/3 for me and 2/3 for her but I suppose what I've missed saying is I'd feel bad if she was paying more? Say it costs £100 I'd be paying £33 and she's be paying £66 but if I shared my whole discount we could both go for £50. Money is REALLY tight for me at the moment but I've been saving up to go to have something to look forward to.

If I'm readin g this right:

OP pays 1/3 of full price (e.g £30 instead of £90)
Friend pays 2/3 of full price (e.g £60 in stead of £90)

So, effectively, you're buying one getting one free.

SO, if it was me, I'd go halves with my friend :)

it all depends on whether the friend knows about how tight money is. Whether they know how much you're paying.

Thanks for clarification.

If money's tight then YANBU to go alone if it's cheaper that way.

If you'd enjoy it more if she's there then, yes I'd probably resign myself to paying the way you describe and saving up for longer.

Neither is unreasonable.

Can your friend not for as a singleton too and get her own 66% discount?

33%, Seriously.

OP, if you both go and share both discounts then you get more % off (assuming she would have to pay full price without you), surely that's a Win: Win situation?

Share discount between you both.

It would be cheaper for me to go alone. If she went alone it would cost her 100%. Am I even making any sense? I don't want to piss people off.

I think I might go alone. Thanks everyone x

If you want her to go with you, then I'd be upfront with her: tell her she's getting a third off because she's going with you, so it will cost her £X, but you're getting a slightly bigger discount.

You've done whatever you needed to do to get any discount at all (been receiving their emails, mailshots, whatever), and she hasn't, so I don't see why she is entitled to the same discount that you're getting.

If she's pissed off that you're getting a bigger discount, then nothing's forcing her to go with you, and you have said you wouldn't mind going on your own. If I was your friend, I'd be glad you'd invited me, and glad I was getting any discount at all

It's actually something I've earned rather than something I've sent off for or been emailed about, but I still have a niggly feeling that I wouldn't be being kind.

There are situations where people are not upfront about the discount they get and it is seen as rude - eg friends inviting you to a particular restaurant that you wouldn't otherwise choose, and paying their half of the bill with vouchers. So I can see why OP is second guessing herself.

OP would you go alone if it cost 50%, or is 33% the maximum you can afford just now? If you can't afford the 50% price then offering to split the entire bill with your friend is beyond your resources just as if that amount were the full price or 10% or whatever.

Be open with your friend. If 67% is too much for her then she can't afford to go. You are never obliged to subsidise your friends, but particularly not when you've already arranged such a substantial discount for her from full price.

If you've earned the discount, then I think even more reason to not give your friend any more of the benefit of it - she's getting a third off already. And well done for earning it!

There's a difference between being kind and being a doormat

Agree with apprentice viper

It wouldn't bother me in the slightest if I was your friend and you had the bigger discount, especially as it's something you have earned, although it would be better if your friend knows in advance.

Personally, I would either split the discount or go alone. It would be too awkward for me otherwise.

Simply explain to your friend you can't afford to pay more than £33 and let her decide if she wants to go.

Can you not just tell your friend you've got discount for a spa and it'll cost x amount. She won't know then that you're receiving more discount

Ah! If it is cheaper to go alone I have misunderstood the subsidies. Sorry.

Have fun, whatever you choose to do.

Oh yes! basic maths. You said in your OP that it would COST you 1/3 the original price, not that you could get 1/3 off.

Explain it to her, she gets the second discount if she wants to go. If she doesn't you will still have a lovely day out

lazylou she is only paying 1/3 of the price (eg, £10 instead of £30) she is getting a 66% discount for herself. And a 33% discount for her friend. (Friend will pay £20 instead of £30)