Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

Original poster

Was my dog unreasonable?

22 replies

a2011x · 21/05/2015 11:19

Been thinking about this since it happened last week and the situation has me a little nervous and would like some views please.

Last week I had to pick up something for my mother from a shop in the middle of town. I was taking my dog out with my mum after I had dropped it to her as we were all going together from hers with her dogs.
I had my daughter with me and I took the dog with me for convenience as to save me going back home when I was very close to my mums anyway. I pulled up directly outside the shop and parked directly outside the shop, its usually a road thats closed but you can use it before 10am so was maybe 5 feet away from the shop door. I had to get a large bulky item so left my dog and child in the car with the windows slightly down, I was in the shop for maybe 1 minute. A volunteer in the shop who has learning difficulties of some kind (relevant) asked if he could look at my dog, so I asked him just to wait a moment while I carried my item out then I would take him over. As I was handing over the money he darted out of the shop ( nearly being run over) and to the window next to my dog and child. I shouted wait a minute as I will introduce them, before I knew it he had stuck his hand straight in to the car in the direction of my daughter and I am ashamed to say it frightened my dog and she tried to bite him. I don't know if she would have but I shouted at her in time to stop her. She didn't touch his skin and I was apologetic to him. He still hadn't taken in what had happened and tried to put his hand in again and my dog was barking at him. I asked him to move away from the car and his manager came out to tell him it was a silly thing to do. For context my dog is usually a friendly and loving dog, perfect with children and other dogs. If I had been there I doubt she would have reacted but it bothers me that she decided to take control. Do you think my dog's reaction was normal ? Is this natural dog behaviour? To add she is usually in the boot with a guard up to stop her coming in to the car but as it was a 5 minute journey I allowed her in the back seat, which I now won't ever do again. Please let me have your honest opinions, sorry for length

OP posts:

Signlake · 21/05/2015 11:33

I think he was protecting your daughter. Normal dog behaviour. However, I'm sorry to say this, if he had of bitten - you would have been unreasonable for putting the dog in this situation

The thing that is mainly bothering me though, is that you left your daughter alone with the dog. One minute or not, it shouldn't happen. I trust my dog and he's never shown aggression or bit (apart from the teething days!) but I would never trust him alone with my children

The situation could have been really bad! At least you know for next time though. I bet you got a really bad shock

sadwidow28 · 21/05/2015 11:37

I can see that you are worried, so I will start:

From your post, I would say that your dog is NOT aggressive and will NOT actually bite. But a warning bark and lurch forward is the way to protect his family and himself. However, he knows the boot with a guard is his safe space. If he doesn't usually travel on a seat then your dog will have been confused and exposed to a new situation which made him anxious and dominant.

My recommendation is NOT to travel with your dog outside of the boot (but you have already decided not to do it again).

I have a saloon car and my Border Collie does travel on the back seat with his harness attached. He is a calm, submissive - but still doesn't like an unknown human sticking their hands through a window. He barks very loudly !

Original poster

a2011x · 21/05/2015 11:40

I totally understand but just clarify I was standing next to the shop door a few feet away, it was a charity shop that had just opened so it was pretty casual and I know them well so she was happy to exchange money and item at the door because they were in the car. I was carrying a huge plastic dog bed which is where I think I went wrong because I wasn't aware of the guy as much as I should of been. With my daughter strapped in to her seat and my dog strapped in the back I thought all was OK, I didn't realise the dog harness was so stretchy but she nearly strangled herself jumping in the front. I would never leave them alone in any other situation

OP posts:

attheendoftheday · 21/05/2015 11:43

My very gentle and passive labradoodle will bark and lunge at people or dogs she considers to be threatening our dds. It's totally normal behaviour and I don't think your dog was at fault.

ItsAllKickingOffPru · 21/05/2015 11:46

No, your dog was not BU at all.

MaxPepsi · 21/05/2015 11:50

Normal dog reaction I would say.

My dog travels in the boot at all times. He would have destroyed the car if anyone randomly started poking their hands through a gap in the window whilst my nieces or nephews were in the car in an effort to protect them.

Signlake · 21/05/2015 11:56

Ah I see. Didn't realise that your dog was strapped in. I apologize for the no dogs and children alone together

In that case, I'd agree with other that you're not being unreasonable at all!

Alisvolatpropiis · 21/05/2015 12:00

Yanbu and neither was the dog.

SonceyD0g · 21/05/2015 12:07

No not in the slightest.
He was guarding your daughter. Normal dog behaviour.
I would always put him in the boot tho in the future.

TedAndLola · 21/05/2015 12:07

If I was sitting in a car and someone unexpectedly thrust their hand through the window I might bloody try to bite them. Dog WNBU!

RedRugNoniMouldiesEtc · 21/05/2015 12:13

Anyone with any dog savy would never do something so silly because they would know it might provoke such a reaction from any dog however passive. Also because it may have frightened a child depending on their age. Clearly this young man wasn't dog savy so went ahead and got the response a dog savy person would have expected.

You weren't unreasonable
your dog wasn't unreasonable
he wasn't unreasonable

It's just one of those things. Don't worry about it.

Blistory · 21/05/2015 12:13

Your dog wasn't unreasonable but I'd caution you that although she didn't make contact this time, this is one of these situations that can escalate very easily.

Both my dogs do this so I had to install window guards - it wouldn't be their fault if they bit some numpty putting their hand in but it would be mine and I refuse to put my dogs in a position where they could be destroyed because of my carelessness or someone else's.

I've found that I cannot prevent idiots from approaching my dogs so I need to go to additional lengths, whether I like it or not and whether it's fair or not, to ensure that the dogs can't cause harm.

Original poster

a2011x · 21/05/2015 13:22

Thanks everyone for making me feel better, I started thinking that maybe if she was prepared to bite she may have an unpredictable nature of some kind, a shock when your dog is usually so friendly and loving. Lesson learned, will keep her in the boot where everyone will stay safe. I just keep wondering if she had bitten could she have been put down etc, but I suppose I will never know. Seeing that I will be keeping her in the boot at all times I dont need to worry about it anymore. Thanks again

OP posts:

helenahandbag · 21/05/2015 13:30

My dog actually barks and jumps up at DP (the dog weighs 6kg and doesn't pass my knee when standing on his back feet, no real threat in this situation!) when we are messing around play-fighting, his instinct is to protect me. Similarly I was firmly massaging a sore muscle in DP's back and the dog ran up and tried to get at my hand to stop me - he thought I was hurting DP!

Your dog's reaction was completely natural and you warned the person not to approach without you being there. It's not your (or the dog's!) fault.

Jenda · 21/05/2015 13:35

Your dog acted responsibly I think! so did you. if he had bitten him it would have been unfortunate but lesson learned for the man who shoved his hand through the window. Dog probably picked up on your apprehension when you were telling the guy to wait too so he was backing you up

partialderivative · 21/05/2015 13:41

Was my dog being unreasonable

This is a reverse thread isn't it

You are the dog!!

Original poster

a2011x · 21/05/2015 13:48

Woof

OP posts:

MagpieCursedTea · 21/05/2015 13:56

It's just a really unfortunate situation. Your dog's reaction was perfectly normal.

Higgle · 21/05/2015 14:24

I think most dogs would behave this way. I've noticed whenever I park next to a car with a dog in it they seem to have a tendency to do aggressive posturing. Possibly partly to protect. I'd never stroke a strange dog through an open window.

NoImSpartacus · 21/05/2015 14:35

Your dog was definitely NBU !

Schmoozer · 21/05/2015 15:26

I've got a very docile little dog, if Someone shoved their arm into the car where the dog and my DD was, I'd be OK if she lunged aggressively to protect them,
Your dog IS perfectly reasonable ??

sadwidow28 · 22/05/2015 00:15

Your dog would NOT have been PTS even if she had bitten the interloper. She is usually passive rather than an aggressive dog that wasn't controlled. First bite and circumstances would mitigate against her being 'to blame'.

Flip