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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to think if you leave the queue, you re-join at the back?

68 replies

LittleMiss77 · 19/05/2015 12:34

long story short - guy in front of me leaves queue, i step forward, he rejoins queue but demands to be let in where he left. I point out that he left the queue so no, he cant do that, he calls me polite and then shoves me and my 33wk pregnant backside out of the way to get his place back.

Was i BU?

Either way, he's casting me off to the pits of hell... my family too. Do you think i'll need suncream? Im very pale....

OP posts:

ChiefClerkDrumknott · 19/05/2015 13:31

Did anyone else in the queue or any employees say anything when he shoved a heavily pregnant woman?

OnlyLovers · 19/05/2015 13:32

This thread is so British.

I think if you leave the queue you've lost your place too, but do agree that there are special circumstances like the 'quick look at a sock display' example cited above in which case it's correct to let the person keep their place.

He's a twunt for pushing anyone, full stop, but it does seem particularly that you're pregnant and he thought that was OK.

sandyway · 19/05/2015 13:33

He was queue jumping. You move you forfeit your place and he assaulted you. Totally you are in the right.

Original poster

LittleMiss77 · 19/05/2015 13:33

DrumKnott - nope, not one thing. They all had a good look to see what was going on though.

OP posts:

Dr0pThePirate · 19/05/2015 13:34

The worst ones are the people who let their friends go in front of them

It's still queue jumping damn it! You're making everyone else wait longer because you're to flippin' lazy to queue up like everyone else!

Breathe, breathe, breathe

morethanpotatoprints · 19/05/2015 13:36

He's a twat for pushing you, whatever the reason.
The ones that bother me are the ones who queue and conveniently remember they have half a shop left to get.
You start loading up the belt and they come back with half a trolleys worth or their oh does.

balletnotlacrosse · 19/05/2015 13:37

I can't believe a staff member didn't intervene.

Drop, I was in a checkout queue once and a guy came over to talk to the couple in front of me who were friends of his. When they had finished paying he just dropped his own groceries onto the belt. I was too surprised to say anything.

SirChenjin · 19/05/2015 13:41

I missed the bit where he'd joined another queue and then came back to yours . I take back my "I'd have let him in" in that case.

Cockbollocks · 19/05/2015 13:41

YANBU, what a twat.

No issue if he was just grabbing something else quickly - but joining another queue isn't on.

yellowdinosauragain · 19/05/2015 13:44

We were queueing for a train ride once traveling from one end to the other of a theme park. Because the boys wanted to, it would actually have been quicker to walk. We had a look at the queue length and judged that we'd get on ok so it was worth the 15 min wait.

Except just as the train arrived about 6 people arrived and pushed in with the person in front of us who'd been holding their place while they had a coffee. He would have heard dh and I discussing whether it was worth waiting or not too.

Dh wasn't having any of it, and made it clear that given that they were pushing in and could go to the back. He wasn't rude but it's fair to say they knew he wasn't going to back down so moved to the back muttering passive aggressively to themselves.

I bet it would have been a different situation if it had been 5ft me calling them on it rather than 6ft 4 dh though. Like I can't imagine the twat in the op would have chanced it with a big bloke but thought it was fine to bully a pregnant woman

What a wanker. Ywnbu.

Dr0pThePirate · 19/05/2015 13:48

Or the time I was 40+ w/p and waddled up to the checkout with 3 items in my basket only to arrive there neck and neck with a little girl who told me her mum was going first. Ok I thought, well mums not here and the conveyer belt was clear. I put my basket down and had just got my sandwich out when mum arrived with a weeks woth of shopping and cut in front of me!

Then the next till opened and the person behind me tried to go in front of me to that one too!

People eh? Awful things!

Dr0pThePirate · 19/05/2015 13:54

ballet I think that's called a "chat and cut". A truly gutless maneuver only used by utter wankers.

It must be challenged at all times. If they resist going to the back of the queue you have to insist they at least let you in front of them.

balletnotlacrosse · 19/05/2015 13:58

You're right Drop. I will be more on the mettle next time I see some chancer try this trick.

ChiefClerkDrumknott · 19/05/2015 13:58

DrumKnott - nope, not one thing. They all had a good look to see what was going on though.

That's rubbish Your colleagues were probably concerned for your safety more than anything, given that he thought it was ok to shove you at all, let alone whilst pregnant. But they were wrong, you were in the right.
May his crotch be infected with a thousand fleas!

balletnotlacrosse · 19/05/2015 14:00

If employees stood by and did nothing I would complain to the shop manager. Even if they were intimidated by the guy they should have got security to intervene.

AlpacaPicnic · 19/05/2015 14:05

I'd have screamed and clutched at my bump if he'd shoved me. Start crying a lot, make a huge fuss and draw lots of attention to him, maybe even fallen to the floor in a dramatic fashion.
What a twat. Him, not you. I cannot believe nobody stood up for you. I'm angrier about that than the queue barging!

Dr0pThePirate · 19/05/2015 14:22

How to deal with queue jumping

m.youtube.com/?#/watch?v=0IGMcicQwAA

lottiegarbanzo · 19/05/2015 14:41

Where were the shop security staff? Why did the cashier then serve him?

I'd be complaining to the shop manager, asking about any CCTV and possibly reporting the assault to the police.

grannytomine · 19/05/2015 14:51

My funniest moment in a queue was one Christmas. Huge queues and everyone getting a bit tetchy. I joined a queue, woman in front of me said, "My husband is here." I looked puzzled, she said, "You can go there, my husband is there." Now I was beginning to think she was mentally ill. So she said, "This place is for my husband." He was off filling the trolley! She expected me to move back to free up the space she was reserving forhim. I couldn't help myself, I just started to laugh, I found it hyterical that this well dressed middle aged woman was jumping up and down because me and my trolley were in her husbands space. She took offence and said, "Oh if you are going to be like that." and stomped off. It was really strange and still makes me laugh for some reason.

And no I don't think you were being unreasonable.

grannytomine · 19/05/2015 14:58

Oh I just thought of another one. Two women were shopping. One was at the deli counter and I was behind her, the other one joined her and started ordering stuff. I wasn't impressed. Get to checkout and again one of these women was in front of me and the other tried to join her, I said I was next and she wasn't going in front of me. They got quite nasty, I can't think of a polite way to say it but they did look rough. I held my ground. One got served then me, she stood at the end of the checkout giving me evils. I wrote a cheque (remember when we did that when shopping) and assistant asked for my bank card. I lied and said "Oh I seem to forgotten it, will my Police ID card do?" Woman at the end of the checkout suddenly backed away, gave look to her friend. I had a feeling I was going to get roughed up but the good old warrant card saved the day.

helenahandbag · 19/05/2015 14:59

He definitely lost his place by trying his luck in another queue - how bloody cheeky!

My DP had an argument with a woman in Heathrow - it was silly o'clock in the morning, we'd been flying all night back from NYC and we were queuing for our connection to Edinburgh. As the doors open and the queue begins to move, a woman stands up and tries to push in front of DP. He asked what she was doing and she said that had been there before. DP pointed out that we'd been standing there for 15 minutes and she hadn't been there, and she said, "I was tired so I went to sit down, but I was here before!"

Luckily DP is very large, very loud and very sweary Glaswegian so it didn't take long to get her shifted

cogitosum · 19/05/2015 15:07

I went to self service till at Waitrose the other day and there was one till available and a trolley of shopping unaccompanied... I ummed and ahhed and then took the till seconds before the lady came back.

We then spent an awkward 5 minutes apologising to each other by which time another till had cleared!

In your situation there was no way he should've pushed back in

DepthFirstSearch · 19/05/2015 15:17

A bloke once tried to start a second, parallel queue for an airport counter when we had all been waiting for the two counters to open for 45 minutes, and when I pointed this to him he ignored me.

I told the check in ladies when they arrived, and they prevented him and the other idiots who had left the original queue to get behind him from checking in until we in the original queue had.

I did wonder if he would go for me after getting past security!

KeepOnTryingTilYouRunOutOfCake · 19/05/2015 15:24

Was stood in the bus stop when DS was tiny and in pram, only 2 prams could get on and there was me and another lady with a pram. Bus pulls up and a different lady walked up to the bus along side me (other lady had gone on bus already, as it was a queue, you see) and as I went to get on she said no, I was here before you, she had stood behind the row of bus stops in the under cover bit, cause it was raining. Fair enough but still! She was in all fairness no where near bus stop til bus came. Not do you mind if I get on I was trying to keep dry, she demanded me off, so she could get on.

Me being all meek and mild at the time, backed off and let her on. I wish to this day I'd had the balls to just carry on as I was and get on the bus, as the ladies left at the bus stop said I should have.

Grr.

MaidOfStars · 19/05/2015 19:37

I once witnessed a very sweet queue war. We were queuing on a dock for a boat trip on Lake Como and were at the roped off bit at the front. An older guy was next to us (plenty of room). Behind the older guy was a similarly aged lady (they weren't together). She inched forward, older guy centred his stance a little firmer. She tried to inch a little to the far side, older guy decided he needed to lean on his walking stick placed just a tiny fraction against her leading foot. She shuffled out to the side a little further, the guy moved his walking stick out to match her. She recentred and moved forward, he stepped back just enough. And so on.

All these little inching movements for about ten minutes, was so cute. Neither of them actually moved more than six inches away from their starting position.

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