To go to the Dr about anxiety?

[36hourdayplease]

Hello

It's been years since I've been on here, but I remember AIBU always had the most traffic.

I planned to post on here yesterday - but I had an almighty shit day so thought I'd post today ... which is proving a 'good' day up to now. Most likely due to the fact 3 year old is at nursery and 1 year old is having a nap!

Basically ... is there any point in me going to the Dr's about anxiety? If I go on a 'good' day, I'll smile, joke and be embarrassed about wasting an appointment. Tell the Dr a good nights sleep has made me feel better and I'll depart blushing promising if I feel sad/anxious again soon, that I'll come back.

If I go on a 'bad' day ... I'll probably cry so much I can't speak and he'll put me on antidepressants.

I am FULLY aware that on the outside I am smiley, kind, considerate, have a lovely family and friends. A car. A house. A job. So what is there to moan about?

I've just lost my Dad at 67. He was ill - but it was being treated and we were hoping that in a matter of time he'd be well and back to himself. It was a shock and I think about him all the time. I miss him so very very much.

I've always been a little anxious and been able to control my panic attacks - which have never turned into full blown panic attacks, but my heart races, I go dizzy, my palms sweat and it takes a good few minutes of deep breathing and talking to myself to bring myself out of them.

To add to this, we're in the process of moving (was to be closer to my Mum and Dad) and it's all balancing on our mortgage provider now requesting further document to prove my husbands self employed income. We are holding up the chain - pregnant woman at bottom and very ill lady at the top of the chain. This too is stressing me out.

I'm worried about my mum who is being very brave - but she's lost her best friend and she's not much over 60.

I have 2 young children (1 & 3) who I adore but they are boisterous little things who I tend to shout at when I'm stressed. This makes me feel bad too.

My hair has started to break off and I'm looking tired and older.

I also get sharp (very short) shooting pains in my chest when I'm very uptight and my mum was worried as my Dad was diagnosed with a weak heart but that too was deemed under control. This eventually broke him.

I told her it was probably indigestion - but she wants me to see a Dr.

I was sorting through some of my Dad's things the other day and my mum told me my lips 'looked a bit blue' ... so she's even more worried about me now, which in turn makes me worry about her!

It's just a vicious circle in my head.

I'm also forgetting thing. I had a cold last week and couldn't remember if I'd taken paracetamol or not! So I had to wait 4 hours to take more just in case!

A more laughable moment was going to the supermarket with one earing in. Why I forgot to put the other in I'll never know!

I also have a job (part-time) that involves me engaging with clients and writing documents using explanatory words - I find myself stuttering and going blank on the most simplistic of words!

Is my brain just crashing from overload?

Or should I be seriously worried?

And what can the Dr really do apart from tell me to relax, take on less, and it'll get better?

Will it?

My word - I'm sorry this post is so long ... I was planning to write a condensed snap-shot of my situation.

If you've read this far - then thank you.

Anyone around to offer any advice?

Smoking isnt healthy but a cigarette and a glass of wine is getting you through atm dont try and deal with everything at once it will just tip you if you dont have that few minute bolt hole for a fag from your boys then its something else to worry about.

Glad to hear you have made the appointment. You have been through an awful lot, so be gentle on yourself. I am so sorry also about the loss of your dad.

All the best, and keep posting here, if it's helping too. There is always an ear to listen, and lots of us know what it's like.

Just wondering how you are doing op.

I felt exactly, EXACTLY, like you. Good day I'd feel like a fraud. Bad day they'd get no sense out of me as I wouldn't be able to talk for crying! So I put it off and off.

Eventually I found a website that listed the symptoms (I have depression as well as crippling anxiety) and printed it off, highlighting all those I have. It was practically all. The GP, and any good GP, took my simply handing this list over as to how hard I was finding this appointment, and was fantastic. And since then, while having reviews for meds or needing extra help, I have gone through anything from laughing and chatting through appointments, to being incoherent. They are used to it, believe me!!

Do go.... anxiety is just the most awful illness. I have terrible depression that on and off can have me from feeling quite ok'ish to suicidal, and yet I would happily trade living with that for the rest of my life if it meant never ever having another anxiety attack. After a severe case this month that saw me in A&E, seeing a lovely doctor, I was sent home with meds that got me to sleep for the day for the first time in 4 days, I had spent the last 4 nights pacing. And then a follow up with my own GP, a tweek of regular medication, and I'm back on an even keel for now. Medication does help, you just have to ask! Believe me they've seen and heard it all before!

Dunkling you sound very brave. I can't read a post like yours without wanting to help. Sorry if it sound pathetic in the light of the magnitude of what you face but have you tried yoga? I think its amazing and helps (even if its a tiny amount) with sleep and feeling able to cope.