What's 'being told off?'

[Luxme]

I was at a party today sitting on the grass with my 5 month old sat in between my legs. A 6 year old came crashing on top of us both, she landed on my LO and another baby who toppled over. Hence much screaming from both babies! I said 'be careful around the babies please' as I lifted her off my LO (I didn't shout) 5 minutes later the child's mother is screaming at me in front of all the kids, swearing and accusing me of telling her daughter off whose only 6 and didn't do it on purpose. The mother was inside the restaurant and wouldn't have seen this.

AIBU, is being told to be careful being told off? (In my day it wasn't) and if it is, was I being unreasonable given her mum wasn't anywhere near her, my LO and the other babies could have been hurt and was out of sight?

Its just a preciousness which seems to be everywhere now, I'm stunned by the amount of people who think other people should tolerate their dc's bad behaviour (or be good little victims of it), without saying a word and anyone who doesn't is in the wrong.

I know at least 2 parents who would have reacted in exactly the same way as this woman and both of their children are fucking hard work to be around.

Don't give it a second thought, Luxme. You did nothing wrong.

People can be such idiots. It may have a positive source (wanting to protect one's child is hard-wired into human beings) but that instinct wrongly applied can lead some people to behave like complete bellends.

I had something similar. Young boy about 10 running up and down my garden wall, not the one bordering the street the one between my house and next doors. He lived on the row of terraces behind. I asked him to stop as it's a good 8ft drop onto concrete from mine to next doors garden quite apart from the fact he was trespassing.

Next thing his dad is on the doorstep yelling that his son is entitled to play anywhere he likes, he got right in my face yelling and swearing. Not one to back down he got it back both barrels. I pointed out I was worried about his sons welfare more than anything, but no he wasn't entitled to run up and down my wall, he backed right down the big bully and when I showed him the wall he thanked me and walked off rather sheepishly with a very embarrassed and in trouble son with him.

The thing that got me is though, I would NEVER have told my mum that a neighbour had told me off, it would have been more trouble than it was worth, mum would have instantly asked what I'd done wrong, I'd have been in trouble for annoying the neighbours. We seem to have lost the ethos that it takes a village to raise a child. It used to be accepted that, within reason any adult would correct a child's behaviour.

My parents would have been so cross with me if I told them a stranger had told me off.

I wouldn't want my dd to be scared to tell me if she felt she had been treated unfairly but I would sincerely hope that I would be capable of not becoming a screaming banshee

She over reacted. Child went and told her she'd been told off and she lost her shit on you. Probably realised she was over reacting and couldn't put the brakes on.
Forget it and forget the classy lady . She just should have come over and asked what happened and see if lo was ok but no, maybe she had had a few????

She was clearly one of those parents who believes that her brat precious angel can do no wrong.

The child certainly won't have gone in and said she had been playing roughly around the babies and ended up crashing down on top of them. She will just have whinged about some strange lady telling her off when she was only playing - knowing full well how her mum would react.

I would hate to be thought of as one of those parents so I'll be getting the full story from DD when she's that age. I would be pleased if DD did something that warranted being told off, it would make her think before she acted next time. Provided they don't go fifty shades of crazy on her and its proportionate.

Ach she's just a simple minded aggressor.
I had something similar a while back where a P1 child kicked his football at my 3 yr old dd's face. He missed by a bawhair thank God. I told him to be careful. Next thing I know the mum is over giving it rah rah rah!

I just calmly said, "I told him to be careful. It was trivial. Come back when you can behave." then I didn't engage her any further. She stomped off to rage to her pals and that was the last I heard of it.

I still see her most days....we get on fine.