worries job centre will sanction me as limited in job options after involved in RTA that has left me too scared to drive

[stuckinthevalleyshelp]

Sorry I've had to name change for this as I think I will be torn to bits and a bit scared that I'll look like an entitled brat.

I used to travel 50 miles to work each way in a job that was OK but didn't love it. One morning there was an impatient driver behind me that was driving far too close and looking like he wanted to overtake. Even though it was on a stretch were there was no overtaking. After a few mins I reduced my speed as he pulled out trying to overtake. He did so and unfortunately there was a car coming the other way very quickly and they had a horrific collision that caused a fatality and a life changing condition. I got caught up and had several injury's that although not life changing I was signed off work for a few months. Although I feel responsible for this I was cleared of any blame what so ever. But still I feel that if I had of kept my speed or increased it then this wouldn't of happened.

When it came time to return to work I just couldn't face driving again. Work were understanding for a while, then my employment was terminated.

I've been on JSA, CTS and housing benefit for almost 18 months now. I agree to look for a job within a 3 hour daily bus ride. Unfortunately the buses are slow and with multiple companies you can't get very far in this time. I've had very little luck getting and job and the money I have to live off doesn't even cover the basics so I've just about eaten up all of my savings. Unfortunately I now don't have the money together to get a deposit if I wanted to move. Not sure I could live off this money for much longer now my savings are gone, but there is very little locally for work. Just signing on costs 13 pounds in bus fares and there is no help for a bus pass.

If I could get into the city I probably would be able to get a job but I still don't feel ready yo drive and can't ever see myself doing it again.

Aibu to still not want to drive?

You can get esa for a mental health issues but you would need a sick note before any of the form filling it starts on the same amount as jsa. I would also speak to your job centre advisor let them know you no long have access to car - they can't make you get a car no one on jsa can afford to buy one. Be as honest as you can about your anxiety because they could ask you apply for a driving job which couldn't do, but if you wait until then and then tell them you very likely will get sanctioned as they will think it's an excuse. It is also possible for them to change your job seekers agreement to include this.

You don't mention a partner or children so have many options re moving. A house share in a big town would be a great starting point. Lower moving costs and the chance to work to save up for your own place.

£18000 could have been a great deposit on a flat in an area where you didn't need to drive.

Driving is not the be all and end all, thousands of people work and can't drive.

Totally agree with Littlemonsters re a house share in a city/big town.

I have a friend who hit and killed a pedestrian in her car. It wasn't her fault and she had no chance of stopping in time but she is also now terrified of driving. She still has her car and practises going very short distances with people (even round the block is a challenge for her) but she has panic attacks and can't continue.

However, she lives in a city with excellent public transport. Her work were required to move her to a dept where driving wasn't a necessity and she gets in and out on the bus. Her housemate and other of us help her out with lifts and talking therapy where possible and she feels very supported and able to cope.

In a more rural area her life wouldn't be manageable any more.

I really feel for you but I think, ultimately (after you've been given a reasonable amount of time to get over something this awful) the onus is on you to make life doable for yourself.

Are you sure the termination of your employment was legal? Did they make reasonable adjustments?

You need to move. I suggest you put your money/energy into making this happen rather than chasing unfair dismissal as some have suggested. A horrible thing has happened to you and unfortunately it means that your current location isn't tenable any more.
Are you renting now? How much deposit will be paid back when the tenancy ends? Or maybe consider a house share whilst you find work and save a drposit.

Considering what has happened to you, you sound like you are doing great. You are having a very normal reaction to soemthing really abnormal occuring. Your GP sounds hopeless, really terribly ill informed about mental wellbeing, can you find another? You don’t need ‘counselling’ it sounds like you could do with some CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy) with a focus on the trauma and the anxiety around driving. You must have a psychological therapies service near you. Increasing Access to Psychological Therapies (IAPT) was rolled out nationally, so there should be a service near you. . Goolge IAPT and then the name of your local council/area and see what pops up. For many of these services you can self-refer (just contact them directly). Best of luck.

She says she's had two courses of CBT - I assumed CBA was a typo.

I agree with seeing your GP. Lots of people don't drive for a variety of reasons and it is not unreasonable that you can't face driving for the time being. I don't think you will be sanctioned for not being willing to drive. But I agree the way forward is to at least consider moving somewhere it would be easier to get to work without having to drive.

Your insurance should be able to organise some counselling. I know two people who were in vad accidents and they both haf counselling and are now back on the road.

Won't mention my job I hate myself sometimes for it but you can get signed off JSA by a doctor for up to 6 months before you have to be assessed and yes you might not remain on ESA after that but it might give you a bit of time to get your head together. The system is changing though. You can also work part time on ESA and not loose out on benefits which may help you to regain your confidence. You need to go into the JS and be honest about what you can actually do not try and please them or be keen. You do not have access to a car and you must tell them, this will help with their expectations of you. They will expect you to travel 90 mins each way to a job however that includes walking to the bus, train waiting etc.
I will say I know you have had an awful time truly horrific but the longer you leave it the harder it will be to return to work. I really hope you can find the support you need.

She's been on JSA for 18 months and has run through her savings. More benefits aren't going to help. She needs a job.

God you poor thing, what an awful thing to go through - and still be going through.

To me it sounds as though the traumatic memories have a hold on you. Is there any way at all you could access specialist help to ease your mental health ie a psychiatrist who specialises in treating mental trauma?

I just wanted to wish the OP good luck.

Also wanted to say we live in a very, very rural area that is 9 miles from the nearest town and public transport. We are surrounded by nothing but farmland. When my son became unemployed and could no longer afford to run his car, the Job Centre told him that because of our location he either had to keep his car or get a scooter/motorbike as otherwise he would be declared as not able to work and receive no benefits. As he already had once had an accident on a scooter, we paid for his car/insurance/petrol in order for him to continue getting JSA.

A lot of employers ask for a driving licence as part of their requirements, even for jobs which are 99% office based.

Why did you tell them you could drive? Just tell them you don't have a car.

'A lot of employers ask for a driving licence as part of their requirements, even for jobs which are 99% office based.'

What if you don't have one? A lot of people don't. It costs a lot of money to get one.

'When my son became unemployed and could no longer afford to run his car, the Job Centre told him that because of our location he either had to keep his car or get a scooter/motorbike as otherwise he would be declared as not able to work and receive no benefits.'

And how on Earth would someone who is on JSA be able to afford to get a scooter or motorbike (and pass the motorbike test) when they cannot afford to run a car?

They cannot force a person to run a car or vehicle.

We have people in our area which are many miles from the Job Centre and work and they are not required by the JC to run a car or motorbike.

Irrespective of jsa, I think you need to move for the long tern future. Any chance your mum could loan you a deposit?

Sorry, but I think that with 18,000 you should have used the money to move closer to your previous job so that you could have continued to work. I'm surprised you were not considered voluntarily unemployed for JSA -- there are many many people who are on JSA who were not given the opportunity to help themselves that you were with almost 20 thousand pounds! I understand needing to pay for physio, but presumably you would have been in a better position to do so had you moved and kept your job.

I'm sympathetic to your situation about driving fear, but you had a great opportunity to move with that money so that you could have kept the job you had. As it is, you need to be willing to do whatever necessary to get into a new job and get off the JSA. If that means a lot of travel for interviews or moving in with your mum, then that's what you have to do.

I think it was £1,800.

The post said 18,000. But 1,800 would make more sense in the circumstances.

I agree that moving to a town with good public transport links is the best option for you. Not everyone drives - I never have and am 57.

90 mins travel is in line with public and private sector employees these days, so not unreasonable

From your op it sounds like you have two choices: either get help with your driving phobia or move somewhere where you can access jobs by public transport.

As a single person you could find a room to rent. It is possible to find these with little or no deposit. Once you are working you could then look for somewhere else. Or are there any friends I'm a town you could lice with temporarily while you find you feet? You could pay them rent.

I am confused, if you claim JSA do you get housing benefit etc?

Because it sounds like you burned through £18k , your benefits and your savings in 18 months assuming you would get another job. Despite knowing that finding a job without a car would be difficult.

Im so sorry to hear of your situation OP Its not always possible to move though as that in itself costs money.

And the idea of living in a house share with people you dont know I know that can work for some but can also be risky.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/_chat/2358246-Live-in-Landlord-walked-into-my-bedroom-last-night

You're right. It is £18k. That is a lot. Well, if it's gone, it's gone. I think you need a job in town and your GP needs to find you some counselling. What else can you do? It could even be a good thing for you.