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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not go to intern`s farewell coffee?

22 replies

StationsAndTrains · 07/05/2015 18:14

tomorrow is her last day. Boss has organised a 30 min farewell meeting in office, and I don´t want to go.

she has sat in our office for nearly a year. she was never interested in us (when came back from being sick she never asked if okay, or from trips abroad) but was always very keen to talk about herself. I didn´t want a friend, but she could be polite. She has never attended a team meeting or any other coffee morning meetings - boss organises these to celebrate birthdays.

she went out for long periods of time in core hours, going for breakfast at a near cafe. she has "worked from home" taking her 5 minutes between finishing her work at home and signing in at office (the trip can`t be made in that time). etc etc. falsified boss´s signature on time sheet. she has played the system, and the boss has allowed her...

all came to a head when she was doing evening job in our office, making non-stop calls. The work she was meant to be doing, didn´t get done. And what she did was full of mistakes.

Colleague asked her if she could perhaps concentrate on her work a bit more. and she blew up, how dare we say that, she is honest and working hard etc. Since then (8 weeks ago) she has only said hello and goodbye - and worked even more for home (I don´t blame her for not wanting to sit in office)

so, would I BU not to go to a 30 min farewell coffee thingy?

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 07/05/2015 18:17

I don't really know why you're asking.

I guess it depends on whether not going, is likely to cause you any problems at work?

DorisLessingsCat · 07/05/2015 18:19

The most important question to ask yourself is "will there be cake?"

I can fake smile at anyone for a bit of battenburg Smile

FourEyesGood · 07/05/2015 18:19

You've put so much effort into a post about someone you're not bothered about...

Just don't go.

Peckhamplex · 07/05/2015 18:21

YANBU - she sounds unpleasant. No need to pretend you're pals. Assuming you can avoid it in an unobtrusive way.

Beeswax2017 · 07/05/2015 18:23

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DinosaursRoar · 07/05/2015 18:24

She's going. Farewell drinks for people you dont like aren't for the person involved, they are for how you are viewed in the office.

Not going (unless you have a good reason like you need to be in another meeting) will make you look petty to your boss.

Orangeanddemons · 07/05/2015 18:24

But she isn't being paid I guess as she's an intern....

Icimoi · 07/05/2015 18:26

Is the farewell meeting at the end of the day? If so, if I were you I think I might invent a reason for needing to leave early. Otherwise, you could say you're just too busy.

OTOH, you could attend on the basis that so far as you (and, I suspect, many others) are concerned, you are celebrating getting rid of her. Suggest to the boss that he provide champagne.

VelvetRose · 07/05/2015 18:26

She sounds dreadful. When people are that blatantly unreliable, rude and disinterested in others it's very difficult to be anything other than happy that they're leaving! If you go what will you say?!

Mrsjayy · 07/05/2015 18:26

Go free coffee and possible cake she wont get very far being rude and disinterested

ChaiseLounger · 07/05/2015 18:28

I wouldn't go. Or maybe I would if there was a slice of coffee and walnut?

Original poster
StationsAndTrains · 07/05/2015 18:28

she will leave to go to it from our office, and it takes place in the open space outside the office, so it will be notuced.
why am I asking? cos normally a nice person, get on with people, but this one has pushed me too far...
good point on cake :-) may ask colleague to smuggle me some!

OP posts:
DisappointedOne · 07/05/2015 18:29

If she's an intern filling in timesheets she most certainly should have been getting paid!

AlternativeTentacles · 07/05/2015 18:29

If she is an intern one day she might be your boss. Go, smile, eat cake. Go home.

madamedesevigne · 07/05/2015 18:32

Of course you should go, if you don't go you will look spiteful, petty or just plain odd. Be the bigger person and wish her well.

VelvetRose · 07/05/2015 18:32

Wasn't she paid at all? That's a bit much to be fair!

Original poster
StationsAndTrains · 07/05/2015 18:34

she is paid (who said she wasn`t?) and her wage wasn´t much lower than mine.

OP posts:
EmpressOfJurisfiction · 07/05/2015 18:35

She might have been paid. I've done paid internships before.

EmpressOfJurisfiction · 07/05/2015 18:35

Sorry, cross post.

mynewpassion · 07/05/2015 18:35

I'd go just to grab cake and take a paid 15 minutes break. Probably never speak to the intern and then grab another slice of cake to bring it to my desk.

DisappointedOne · 07/05/2015 18:35

While internships are common in certain industries it's incredibly hard to have an unpaid intern. If they're paid expenses only then they can come and go exactly as they please - not turn up, take long lunches etc. They can't be responsible for anything, or do "work". If you want them to be useful members of the team and control what they do and when, then you have to pay them at least minimum wage.

VelvetRose · 07/05/2015 18:36

In that case yanbu at all!!

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