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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Not to care about my car?

43 replies

whatlifestylechoice · 04/05/2015 21:31

About 18 months ago I bought an old car with very low mileage (was previously owned by an old man) for about 3k. I learned to drive late in life, so this is only my second car. The first was written off when DP had an accident in it that was not his fault.
We live very rurally, down an unpaved track.

Tonight, one f my neighbors called around to tell me that he had reversed into my car by accident, and has slightly dented the bumper and scraped the side a little bit. I went to look at the damage and it was as he had said so I told him not to worry about it.
I was telling a friend this earlier and he said I was crazy not to pursue it as neighbour has actually damaged my car.
But it's only scratches and dents, which the car already has plenty of. At the angle and speed my neighbour was reversing, he's highly unlikely to have caused any functional damage, And I don't really care what my car looks like, so AIBU just to let this slide?

OP posts:
tobysmum77 · 05/05/2015 07:20

yanbu or our old car I wouldn't have cared about, I'd have just been Grin look at it. New one I would get him to pay to repair it though.

tobysmum77 · 05/05/2015 07:22

But I think you are a bit precious actually, you specifically mention it has a low mileage. Theres something really special about getting to 100000 imo Grin .

Nightboattocairo · 05/05/2015 07:38

Is this thread the motor equivalent of stretching a chicken to a month's meals?

Bakeoffcake · 05/05/2015 07:59

I have the same attitude towards cars, we've had everything from old bangers to new cars, and I feel the same whatever the car. They get you from A to B. I don't give a shit about how clean they are or if they have a few dents and scratches. Dh is exactly the same.

TeWiSavesTheDay · 05/05/2015 08:08

I don't care either. Our Car is 7/8 years old.

I don't understand why people care about scratches at all tbh, even on new cars - you drive them around outside, trying to keep them scratch free is a fool's errand! Who needs the stress and pressure?

DEATHcameforSirPterry · 05/05/2015 08:23

I've got a 15 year old Seat Alhambra. It's so covered in chips, bumps, scrapes and dents that I'd have no idea if it was a new mark or not. Grin

It's been the best car ever but is finally on it's last legs and we're looking a fairly new second hand car. I'm going to be terrified to drive it in case it gets scratched.

penisland · 05/05/2015 08:27

I don't understand why people care about scratches at all tbh, even on new cars - you drive them around outside, trying to keep them scratch free is a fool's errand! Who needs the stress and pressure?

Because for some people cars are an obsession, their number one interest. Do they go around belittling your interests and hobbies?

OP it sounds perfectly reasonable in your situation to not bother. If the car is already a little beaten up and you're not really fussed then that's the way forward.

penisland · 05/05/2015 08:32

Still hanker after a Renault 5 GT Turbo

Have you driven one? They're pretty crap! There are much better contemporary hot hatches.

frangipani13 · 05/05/2015 08:36

I admire your attitude OP and wish more ppl had it. DH scratched the bumper of a colleague's ancient shit heap of car (ours was an even shittier heap) a tiny bit, offered to repair/pay to get the bumper touched up. Colleague insisted on going through the insurance so our premium has gone up. Insurance company advised that by the time this man got a courtesy car etc the total cost of the claim was over 1.5k which seems complete madness.

Songofsixpence · 05/05/2015 08:43

YANBU.

I'm the same with my car. It's just a car, it gets me from A to B. As long as it does that, then I really don't care.

I reversed into my house the other day, every time the kids get out they bang the doors on the garage walls, I live at the end of a unmade track so the outside is filthy, the inside is full of rubbish and dog hair.

It's not a complete skip, but the odd scratch and dent doesn't affect my ability to drive it.

DH is extremely precious about his car. He has a company car which is leased and has to be returned in good condition every 3 years. His company get fined per scratch so he's careful with it

scarletforya · 05/05/2015 10:33

Fine, but when you get hit from behind, always open and close the boot to make sure the boot floor hasn't moved. Otherwise it's just cosmetic.

tobysmum77 · 05/05/2015 10:37

It is cosmetic but if a car is newer then it is worth less with a dent in the side. If you are on HP then you often have to pay for damage.

penisland · 05/05/2015 10:42

Not true scarlet just because the boot opens and closes does not mean that there hasn't been damage done to internal impact absorbing structures. If the damage is not repaired and you're hit again you could end up more seriously injured due to the crash structures not being able to do their job. This is why a seemingly small impact with a cracked bumper may cost £££ to repair. Always get your car checked out if it's been in even a small accident (other than parking dings etc)

feezap · 05/05/2015 11:22

YANBU, you are being nice if anything but why potentially cause bad feeling if you really don't care? Everyone is happy now so you are perfectly normal to keep it that way.

I fessed up when I scratched a car at work, it was only a tiny scratch and my car had no mark on it at all (typical). I offered to pay for any cost to repair and did, it was £70. To be honest, it was one you could have done at home if you knew how and that was a lot to pay. I was pregnant at the time and this guy earned probably three times what I did but it was my fault and I paid (I wish he had been a bit more normal like you OP!)

balletnotlacrosse · 05/05/2015 11:22

My car is ancient and I don't worry about scrapes and scratches. I wish more people just viewed them as practical utilitarian objects and not as treasured possessions or status symbols.

Bogal · 05/05/2015 12:10

YANBU - a neighbour biffed the bumper on my car while parking and came over in a right fluster offering to T-cut it, repaint, blah blah blah... I told her not to worry about it - there's no point in getting precious over a bit of cosmetic damage!

bellybuttonfairy · 05/05/2015 12:36

Im always bumping my car - dh now just wearily shakes his head. I never worry about knocks and scrapes.

Cars are delicate things - its to keep them cosmetically perfect.....

penisland · 05/05/2015 12:49

Hang on feez you damaged someone else's property and wish you hadn't had to pay for it? £70 is pretty cheap for a smart repair but why should he have been out of pocket due to your carelessness? Just because you don't care about your own property doesn't mean that others feel the same about their property. You're lucky he agreed to the smart repair rather than going through insurance and having it repaired properly which is what I would do in that situation. The whole panel would need to be painted plus blending into the surrounding panels.

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